Some advice on this Cancer woman's behavior

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11/28/2011 11:37:51 AM | IP

42 years old female from A Lush Meadow, US of A

In the dead of night, it's the anti-sig.

You have 2 alternatives. Live with the drama, or cut it loose. It reads as user/enabler. You can isolate everything down according to ethnicity, zodiac, etc, etc ad nauseum. But that is the upshot.

thirdeye

11/28/2011 10:10:43 AM | IP

Posted by MoonBunny
OK.

We're NOT so complicated. Cancer women are traditional. Most of us expect proper courtship with the men doing the pursuing with all the proper rituals. Flowers, gifts, trips to the funfair, and we must be shown respect due as ladies as if the men are gentlemen, and we expect our men to be. Doesn't mean he needs to hide all his depth, but only it has to be within limit, don't overdo it.

Piscies itself is the real complicated of the two with mind games, illusions and whatnot, Cancer merely reflects what she receives and perhaps play along. I have it from many friends the Pisces male are flaky. You need to work on yourself maybe, and not her. Finding fault about all the females that come your way isn't going to make you look good as a man, is it?

Ok I can vaguely see where this is coming from, however I haven't been flaky with her, I've been supporting her in her job, her medical life, and her personal life. Admittedly there have been times where I have had to change plans, although not often. I've found fault in two previous females on here (one I think most people agree had serious red flags, the other flatly boasted she's playing guys out, and now we're here...) I fail to see how that consitutes as all?

Additionally, don't you think saying Pisces as a collective whole play mind games, smoke and mirror illusions, and what not is a bit of a sweeping generalization? I could easily apply negative traits and if you look at my first post, I notably said while I know a, b, and c are negative traits of Cancers does this seem normal from an outsider's perspective? Implying that I thought some perspective as opposed to making a blank statement about an entire collection of people.

MoonBunny

11/27/2011 12:08:35 AM | IP

female from Europe

Virgo Ascendent Cancer Sun (2nd deca

Really now? This Pisces guy was the one going "all the other girls are gaga over me and they always act how I want my girl to act so why not you?" to his Crab girl. I mean, if there's something about your girl that got you hooked, why try to change it, instead of accepting it? And if she's not the kind of girl you want, you could always walk away.

You see this kind of Fish flip-flopping going on all the time.

capcap

11/26/2011 9:40:58 PM | IP

Don't communicate with her!!!! She won't want to lose you so she'll come back. Don't let her control you. Control yourself enough to where it bothers her more than it bothers you. I told mine I'm really good at controlling my emotions..and she told me she doesn't believe it. I showed her too much affection because I wasn't afraid. She'll toy with us to make sure we don't go away. She'll make it sound like we're the bad guy no matter what. Even if she likes us at times, when we try to control her..she'll make it sound like I have no right and that I'm lucky she's still keeping me around even though I've done questionable things. They manipulate!!

I love you cancers, don't take offense to anything i say. It's just the immature one's can really get to us Capricorns cuz when we feel something...we know it's right.

capcap

11/26/2011 9:36:52 PM | IP

dealing with a cancer doing the SAME things to me. well same as in she is being just as crazy. She says one thing one day...she feels what she says in the moment. Thinks for like 1 day because I'm getting too close, goes defensive and feels her way out through a different emotion. Like i caught mine in a lie and that night she apologized to me so much because i walked out on her and told her to get out of my life. This girl..the next day doesn't respond so i get worried because i just trusted her so much the night before. I flip out on her for ignoring me and not reassuring me with trust...like it was bad. I probably was the meanest I've ever been to her.. I'm a capricorn, i will not take butter and my words will hurt. It's gotten to be so much that she made us do the craziest thing ever. She convinced me to go to couples counseling because I saw things my way(relationship) but she never did(friends). I was like wow, but i went along with it. I was like the doctor will see that she's crazy. We get in there...i say my side...she tells the doctor she didn't know what to do because when i caught her in the lie she was so petrified that she couldn't think. I was like WOW.. then after the thing i was like i can't believe i listened to her taking us to COUPLES COUNSELING because she wanted us to remain friends..when all we've ever been according to her is friends. Anyways after all that craziness, we ended up sane somehow.. we always do. But after that, I was like I'm not doing this anymore. Don't let her control you. Don't text her. Don't do anything for her. I don't know if it's working for mine because we haven't really talked in the last few days. And today i texted her for the first time saying i need your advice on understanding someone else(another girl). We send 2 texts, she says she probably isn't the best person to help and I was like well don't worry..i was hesitating to ask but I only did because we're good friends. I said don't worry and told her I'd talk to her later cuz she said she was busy with family. After i say bye, she replies saying she won't be getting any texts for the next 20 minutes cuz she's switching her phone and then says Bye. ...cookiemonster i'm not texting you is what I wanna tell her. I hope this finally works because I'm treetrunking tired of this crazy ass cookiemonster..even though we care for eachother like no other.

MoonBunny

11/26/2011 8:15:35 PM | IP

female from Europe

Virgo Ascendent Cancer Sun (2nd deca

OK.

We're NOT so complicated. Cancer women are traditional. Most of us expect proper courtship with the men doing the pursuing with all the proper rituals. Flowers, gifts, trips to the funfair, and we must be shown respect due as ladies as if the men are gentlemen, and we expect our men to be. Doesn't mean he needs to hide all his depth, but only it has to be within limit, don't overdo it.

Piscies itself is the real complicated of the two with mind games, illusions and whatnot, Cancer merely reflects what she receives and perhaps play along. I have it from many friends the Pisces male are flaky. You need to work on yourself maybe, and not her. Finding fault about all the females that come your way isn't going to make you look good as a man, is it?

thirdeye

11/26/2011 6:59:30 AM | IP

Different person

MoonBunny

11/26/2011 1:19:00 AM | IP

female from Europe

Virgo Ascendent Cancer Sun (2nd deca

Didn't you say she was French awhile back?
Or is this a different Crab?

thirdeye

11/25/2011 9:55:31 AM | IP

Posted by extempjunk
OMG, I have a Cancer female friend just like this in a relationship with a Pisces guy. She's in her late 20s and Chinese too. Starting to freak out and wonder if it's her or something, lol. Anyway, in reference to the above, maybe she thought you think it was cute. There's gotta be some reason you're with if you're putting up with all of this stuff. I mean, you're not just asking for validation that she's acting unfairly and immaturely, are you? I think that's been established.

Haha could be me, although I doubt it. After a serious of different issues throughout the week I finally told her it's time we consider letting go, the jealousy and paranoia from her end got to be too much and it was affecting me as well as friends. Friends felt intimdated by her beahvior and how she would constantly question one of them in particular even though she was telling her the truth, said Cancer wouldn't believe her and kept drilling her, to the point that she thought she was going to have to lie just to appease her and ended up leaving that night with her boyfriend because she was essentially uncomfortable. Even worse, I have a friend visiting and she decided that I shouldn't give this friend who is female any time on her first day back and having not seen her in 2 years I said that's not fair and that I had already made an invitation for this Cancer to meet this friend. Despite the fact that this friend even saved our relationship at one point, the Cancer feels threatened by her and says she doesn't want to meet her or talk to her and that I shouldn't be planning my evening around this friend because she doesn't want to be dragged around town. Kind of a fair point but not really, and given the fact when her friend came in town we had to wait for him to meet up with 5 hours after we had planned and I had to change a group of 8 people's dinner plans to accomodate her meeting her friend, which she doesn't think was me being accomodating and even expected me to be buying her and her friend drinks for the night. She didn't like that, so she walked away from me and went home. All in all said, I just need to pick up my stuff, because at our age I don't put up with this kind of behavior. Sadly she's not going to let me pick up my stuff till we have a "cool down" period.

extempjunk

11/17/2011 8:51:27 PM | IP

And miles to go before I sleep.

OMG, I have a Cancer female friend just like this in a relationship with a Pisces guy. She's in her late 20s and Chinese too. Starting to freak out and wonder if it's her or something, lol. Anyway, in reference to the above, maybe she thought you think it was cute. There's gotta be some reason you're with if you're putting up with all of this stuff. I mean, you're not just asking for validation that she's acting unfairly and immaturely, are you? I think that's been established.

CrabbyTwins

11/17/2011 2:26:19 PM | IP

from USA

GEMINI/CANCER "CANCIMINI--The crabby t

Posted by thirdeye
All my friends who have heard me rant about her, think she's psychotic/paranoid/childish. She's had tantrum fits because I wouldn't sleep at hers jumping up and down repeatedly and saying "no no no no no no" in a childish voice. .

Was this your idea of the type of woman u want in your life?

CrabbyTwins

11/17/2011 2:24:30 PM | IP

from USA

GEMINI/CANCER "CANCIMINI--The crabby t

Posted by thirdeye
Posted by CrabbyTwins
Oh shes Chinese.......
this makes all the difference in the world believe it or not.
They are brought up with different beliefs. Their culture is very different.
Doesn't mean that they do not cheat or are not deceitful but at the same time. They are workaholics......

but wait a minute.....

She said she doesn't like her because she is asian and she knows how asians are.....This could be why you became insecure of the relationship. She made a jealous statement which in turn made her look bad. She planted a seed in your mind and now its back firing on her.....

I wander if she realizes what she has done by making comments like that......I wander how americanized she is?

Well she lived in the States for a few years, so she's pretty Americanized. Still though, it's not her questioning my friend that's the main concern. It's her behavior with the other guy? I mean I am at dinner with someone I am dating/like the last thing that comes to my mind is if someone who hit on me is coming to the event and what seems to be concern that they didn't contact me as opposed to someone else at the event...

True. It brings me back to my previous statement or rather question, what will make you happy? What do you want sincerely, bcuz living with these constant fears of what is, is not healthy. Your going to either trust her or dump her. Possible give her an ultimatum and then what. Continue to eat the same bullbutter.

thirdeye

11/17/2011 11:08:01 AM | IP

Posted by CrabbyTwins
Oh shes Chinese.......
this makes all the difference in the world believe it or not.
They are brought up with different beliefs. Their culture is very different.
Doesn't mean that they do not cheat or are not deceitful but at the same time. They are workaholics......

but wait a minute.....

She said she doesn't like her because she is asian and she knows how asians are.....This could be why you became insecure of the relationship. She made a jealous statement which in turn made her look bad. She planted a seed in your mind and now its back firing on her.....

I wander if she realizes what she has done by making comments like that......I wander how americanized she is?

Well she lived in the States for a few years, so she's pretty Americanized. Still though, it's not her questioning my friend that's the main concern. It's her behavior with the other guy? I mean I am at dinner with someone I am dating/like the last thing that comes to my mind is if someone who hit on me is coming to the event and what seems to be concern that they didn't contact me as opposed to someone else at the event...

CrabbyTwins

11/17/2011 10:56:25 AM | IP

from USA

GEMINI/CANCER "CANCIMINI--The crabby t

The user who posted this message has hidden it.

thirdeye

11/17/2011 10:34:24 AM | IP

Huh?

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