Role Reversal - Has a man ever made you wait?
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|Nope, I'd wonder if he has issues of getting up. I had one that took it slow, just because we really were enjoying each other's company, but when we did it it was, I landed right in the middle of the milky way and never felt better.|
Posted by ninjamu
|It's such a normal condition that people will respond knowing exactly what you mean, AND they would consider the title of it being a "role" as normal.|
|It's a no wonder why relationships are so treetrunked up these days .... people make the conditions of sex a top priority.|
Waiting for sex isn't apart of my life ... there is no waiting, or not waiting .... I don't allow sex to have that much importance to the terms of a relationship that I would even consider the existence of a waiting time, nor it's appropriateness.
Posted by ninjamu
|Trust me, if every woman in the world made a man "wait" for sex OR if every woman stopped giving it up, the sociodynamic for which men place a high priority on sex would ABSOLUTELY change. Men do whatever they're allowed to do. They allow their little head to think for their big head b/c 1. They see every other man/influence doing so 2. Even if punished for it (stds, unwanted pregnancy, etc.) there are easy quick-fixes that a man can obtain & move on from unharmed/unphased & 3. They're not put in situations with women that challenge them to think with their other head. |
For every 1,000 men that are having trouble thinking with their big head, there are 2,000 women who encourage that, tease them, put up with that and/or that don't give them a reason/incentive to change that. There are 3,000 stripper poles, prostitutes, hoes and willing participants. Anyone else seeing the connection here?!
Posted by ninjamu
Testerosterome may be 1 thing that contributes to a man's absolute craving for anything sexual, BUT I think the "We care about sex so much b/c we're men/humans" line is a bunch of bull. If that were the case, every man would not be able to control themselves. The mere fact that some absolutely CAN (especially when they want to) lets me know that no, it's not wired, it's just somewhat of a challenge. And the same applies to the ladies too. Men need to admit that sex is just 1 of those obstacle courses they rarely beat, vs. giving in & saying "Oh screw it, it's in my blood." Men absolutely do choose to place such a priority on sex either b/c of society, what they've been exposed to in childhood, and/or maturity. The only thing "wired" in a man is testosterone & even then, even though all men have it, all men DON'T place a high priority on sex.
In fact, recent studies suggest that actually women have a harder time dealing with sexual frustration & craving for sex more than men do, just like the misconception that men don't like to commit is false too (Men are more willing to commit/open to committment as women) But people mistake their lack of discpline as being considered something that's "wired" in us. People choose their own battles, & from there they choose to spend their lives combatting those obstacles.
|If I don't love you I will make no motion toward the bed. But that won't matter.|
|I'd think he was playing games too...or that he has something to hide, which would start to concern me and then I wouldn't know if I'd want to...lol|
No a normal thing to have go on as most are too impatient!
|It's usually a lack of sex that kills relationships.|
I don't think men choose to put a priority on sex. It's how they're wired. It just takes a lot of effort to not let the other head take over. Most men I know would like to opt out of being controlled by their dicks much of the time.
|My current flame made me wait. Not too long but he let me know it wasn't going to happen when I wanted it to. He was afraid to get into a relationship at that time and he didn't want me to develop feelings for him if he decided not to pursue things.|
|But if feelings/love is involved & yet he's still not willing to have sex, there could be a deeper issue there. The same coud apply too towards women who have everything they want but yet still won't give it up. |
Tyler Perry said that 1 of the reasons he always made women "wait" was b/c he was molested as a child by a 40 yr old women. That forever changed his concept/perception of sex. While other guys in their young 20's couldn't wait to jump into bed with the next willing chick, Tyler was saying "Hell no!"
I've met some guys who swear they're not even into masturbation or porn at all. I can believe a man that says he doesn't entertain porn, but it's quite hard to believe the men that swear they don't jack off. But hey, there really are some men that don't desire sex as much as their peers. The only thing "weird" about men like this is that they're different from most other men on this earth, NOT them actually wanting to "wait." Hell, I think alot of relationships would last alot longer & alot of stds would be NON existent had men stopped putting so much priority on sex like some women know how to do
|It depends. Normally the kinds of guys that make you wait will usually have some sort of strong opinion about sex, whether it's b/c of religious beliefs, mistakes in the past or simply him just trying something different. Guys like this normally mention their strong beliefs though, so it shouldn't be a huge surprise to a woman who notices that he's not asking for/up for sex. |
Not all guys are horn dogs. Some actually want to know exactly where a woman's mind is. It's not that they're making you wait b/c they're playing games, but instead that men TOO know how to change up the strategies a bit when the ones they've used in the past didn't work. Women do it all the time. After they sleep with 10 guys too early only to realize that doing so probably ruined things, they decided to try something "new" next time & actually make a man wait. Men do this too.
Just b/c a guy may not engage in the literal act of sex with you doesn't mean that he's not open to foreplay or other things that involve intimacy or sexual relations.
I agree that there's a difference b/w "taking it slow" vs. actually making someone "wait." There are 1 million other things other than sex that 2 people might go at different paces on. I think it's a SAD DAY when a man who actually thinks with his BIG head over his "little head" is seen as suspicious or one to play mind games. Smh
Now if a guy claims he's "not ready" for sex, but yet teases you all the time, he's probably full of shxt, is playing mind games and/or is testing you.
Hell 2 guys told me once that the reason they won't have sex early on is b/c they've had too many experiences with women poking holes in condoms. An unwanted pregnancy will make some men think TWICE before jumping head 1st into the bed w/ someone!!
|One tried, yes. My usage of past tense should make the outcome obvious. |
Physical touch and intimacy is very important to me. I'm not saying that I can't sit back and enjoy the building of tension. I love the anticipation! However, you better give it up after a couple of months or I will get bored. While I'm not fond of the 3rd date rule, I don't think it's weird when guys lose interest if a woman plays too hard to get. Utter prudish behavior is a turn-off for me as well. I need to fill all of my senses with him in order to make a final decision as to where we will, or will not, go. Physical closeness and sensuality is part of the glue in my relationships.