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Situation with a pisces girl

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ksirtadnimeht
7/2/2012 3:21:05 PM | IP

Posted by IntriguedScorp
I was like "Yay" and then I was like "sorry "

She sounds very immature (how old is she?) and like she cannot be outside a relationship for one minute. Also, maybe she's back with Mr Abuser. If so, he's probably overly possessive and jealous and she feels the need to announce to the world that she's taken because of it. She sounds a mess.

You are much better off without her. Have a wonderful life and forget all about this crazy experience is my advice. Good luck.


She is 24. It's a new guy she is with, from the looks of his FB page they met a week ago, and within 5 days were in a relationship. Thing is, she met this guy a few days after i'd stopped contacting her, and then announced their relationship a few hours after she'd started speaking to me again, so I can't help but think that she is testing me out and seeing how I feel for her.

Anyway, I told that there is no way i'm pursuing her whilst she is with someone else so if she does want me - which seems impossible for her to answer directly - then she needs to break up with him, if she stays with him then i'm going until my feelings are cleared and I can see her just as a friend. Her response was typically vague about him not being all that great, that he blows him off and she's not gonna answer his calls for 3 days... So, no direct answer there, AGAIN!

Thanks for the advice, I'm curious to see where this will flow, I'm giving her a chance to make it clear or not whether she wants me, so i'll see what she does and then go from there. I won't be messed around, but i'll accommodate the reality that people are different and work different ways and just cos I don't get how she behaves doesn't mean it is wrong or without reason. But the moment it feels wrong within then it'll be over. Thank you again.
IntriguedScorp
6/30/2012 7:25:34 AM | IP
IntriguedScorp



Scorp with a Saggie Moon. That's all yo

I was like "Yay" and then I was like "sorry "

She sounds very immature (how old is she?) and like she cannot be outside a relationship for one minute. Also, maybe she's back with Mr Abuser. If so, he's probably overly possessive and jealous and she feels the need to announce to the world that she's taken because of it. She sounds a mess.

You are much better off without her. Have a wonderful life and forget all about this crazy experience is my advice. Good luck.
ksirtadnimeht
6/29/2012 9:01:26 PM | IP

The user who posted this message has hidden it.

ksirtadnimeht
6/29/2012 8:58:25 PM | IP

Ok so she has returned, BUT, two hours after her return she announces on her Facebook that she is in a new relationship! Now, given she's been gone for 6 weeks, and given she knows clearly how I felt about her, why does her return to me have to coincide with revealing a new boyfriend? Who does that? If she has a new boyfriend then shouldn't she be immersed in him rather than renewing a friendship with a guy who she knows has feelings for her? I think this one is a headtreetrunk par excellence! I don't get her. I wonder if she wanted to see how id respond to her return before anything else? Cos I didn't greet her return with any enthusiasm or warmth - cos I didn't feel it, i'd accepted that she was gone and I was moving on, and maybe cos she didn't get anything off me she made this new relationship official?? I dunno, that might just be my vanity, but at the same time, there has to be some explanation and reasoning behind her actions.

This is going beyond any personal feelings now and is becoming more of a pure fascination with how a fellow human being operates. Cos I don't get it. Her actions aren't something I can relate to. I can't understand what would lead her to contact me for the first time in 6 weeks and then within 2 hours of that announce a new relationship. But i'd love to understand! I'm on a spiritual path and my life code is 'love everyone, in every moment, every circumstance, no matter how they behave' and so being confronted with this kind of behaviour is something of a challenge to my love just cos it seems to unloving on her behalf, and yet we were close, i've been so good to her, given her so much support. I think I got myself a freaky fish!
ksirtadnimeht
6/29/2012 3:57:16 PM | IP

She's returned. Just got a message on Facebook off her. She said she'd decided to take time out cos of health issues, but that she is healthy and happy now. She said that she was happy that I was here still.
ksirtadnimeht
6/25/2012 5:03:08 AM | IP

Posted by piranhaparadiise
Pretty much agree with scenic in that you've done your part...you've messaged her and now it's time to let things settle for a while...let her have some breathing space...maybe she will come around maybe not...but the right thing to do is give someone the *choice* in whether they want to hear from you or not...and in that I mean let her decide to contact you when she is ready or not...you need to respect her space and Pisces have no problems cutting off contact...you will have to be a fish to understand that we can do it and it can look cold but for the fish it is needed...because sometimes people inundate us with their heavy aura/vibes...emotions whatever...even a simple hello how are you....we can *feel* *sense* the emotions behind that...and *that* can drain us....hence many a fish disappear and sometimes for good...mostly...


Yeah I think I overdid my love and compassion for her. I get like that... kinda love bomb someone. But i'm not gonna give myself a hard time over that. She appreciated it for a while but I guess in the end it maybe got too much and no longer helped her but instead swamped her with another layer of emotions. I just have to look at myself and learn. It's difficult to know how to interact with people at times. On the surface we can all seem so similar, but underneath such different forces are at work, and once you get past initial superficial interaction you have to be so sensitive to someone to truly serve them with love and compassion. So long as i'm learning and growing them i'll embrace any situation, however much it might sting me. I just hope that she gets the love she deserves in life.
ksirtadnimeht
6/25/2012 4:58:40 AM | IP

Posted by Scenic
Didn't mean to be harsh or anything. She should get it, though. Whatever happens now, it's up to her to take responsibility and make something happen. I'm a really insensitive person, though, so if what I'm saying doesn't work with you, then do it your way. You have your own knowledge on what you think may work and it's probably more fit for your personality. I am sorry about your situation. I know how hard it is to let go of someone you care about. You want to keep talking to them to see if things can work out, but you also have to know when to stop - and that's really difficult. Good luck. Update if any word from her!


No, don't worry, I appreciate and need honesty. I think i've read the situation with her wrong - defo she has misled me in parts, but she was emotionally messed up and going through shht and probably just wanted some relief, even if it wasn't real, but just a temporary fix. And anyway, if truth be told, I don't have much feeling for her - how can I from just talking online? I think it's cos when I commit to someone I really commit to giving them my all, and so to do that and to support her as I did throughout what she was going, but then for her to just go is a bit saddening, BUT, I have to take responsibility, because I obviously was not what she wanted or needed in the end, and that can only be because of my actions. It's truly no big loss... it's the confusion that causes me the most angst.
piranhaparadiise
6/25/2012 2:54:04 AM | IP

female

Pretty much agree with scenic in that you've done your part...you've messaged her and now it's time to let things settle for a while...let her have some breathing space...maybe she will come around maybe not...but the right thing to do is give someone the *choice* in whether they want to hear from you or not...and in that I mean let her decide to contact you when she is ready or not...you need to respect her space and Pisces have no problems cutting off contact...you will have to be a fish to understand that we can do it and it can look cold but for the fish it is needed...because sometimes people inundate us with their heavy aura/vibes...emotions whatever...even a simple hello how are you....we can *feel* *sense* the emotions behind that...and *that* can drain us....hence many a fish disappear and sometimes for good...mostly...
piranhaparadiise
6/25/2012 2:30:24 AM | IP

female

Pretty much agree with scenic in that you've done your part...you've messaged her and now it's time to let things settle for a while...let her have some breathing space...maybe she will come around maybe not...but the right thing to do is give someone the *choice* in whether they want to hear from you or not...and in that I mean let her decide to contact you when she is ready or not...you need to respect her space and Pisces have no problems cutting off contact...you will have to be a fish to understand that we can do it and it can look cold but for the fish it is needed...because sometimes people inundate us with their heavy aura/vibes...emotions whatever...even a simple hello how are you....we can *feel* *sense* the emotions behind that...and *that* can drain us....hence many a fish disappear and sometimes for good...mostly...

Scenic
6/24/2012 9:53:06 PM | IP
Scenic

female from U.S.A.  

Sun Pisces Moon Pisc

Didn't mean to be harsh or anything. She should get it, though. Whatever happens now, it's up to her to take responsibility and make something happen. I'm a really insensitive person, though, so if what I'm saying doesn't work with you, then do it your way. You have your own knowledge on what you think may work and it's probably more fit for your personality. I am sorry about your situation. I know how hard it is to let go of someone you care about. You want to keep talking to them to see if things can work out, but you also have to know when to stop - and that's really difficult. Good luck. Update if any word from her!
ksirtadnimeht
6/24/2012 12:13:02 PM | IP

Posted by Scenic
I think you're thinking waaaaay too much into this online thing. If I were her, I might not necessarily delete you, nor want/care that you see that I'm online. I wouldn't care. I'm online for other reasons and talking to other people. AND, if she is just trying to get over some things in her life, then she may want you back in her life, but not at the exact moment, which is why she doesn't delete you. I think you need to chill. Try to move on with your life. Don't bother her. If she cares enough about you, she will contact YOU. And if she were to be playing games with you, then once again, she would end it and contact you when she realizes that you're done playing along. You've already tried to contact her and she knows you're interested in continuing your friendship, etc with her, so what else is there to do? Wait.


Lol, true that. I suppose it's my only slightest of slight insights into what is going on, but you're right, it doesn't matter, i'll just leave her be and let her decide what happens - if anything - next. Thanks for the kick up the butt. I think the other poster gave me some encouragement so I thought i'd run with it for a bit, but it's irrelevant, she'll contact me if she contacts me, end of. Thanks.
Scenic
6/24/2012 11:28:50 AM | IP
Scenic

female from U.S.A.  

Sun Pisces Moon Pisc

I think you're thinking waaaaay too much into this online thing. If I were her, I might not necessarily delete you, nor want/care that you see that I'm online. I wouldn't care. I'm online for other reasons and talking to other people. AND, if she is just trying to get over some things in her life, then she may want you back in her life, but not at the exact moment, which is why she doesn't delete you. I think you need to chill. Try to move on with your life. Don't bother her. If she cares enough about you, she will contact YOU. And if she were to be playing games with you, then once again, she would end it and contact you when she realizes that you're done playing along. You've already tried to contact her and she knows you're interested in continuing your friendship, etc with her, so what else is there to do? Wait.
ksirtadnimeht
6/24/2012 11:07:42 AM | IP

The user who posted this message has hidden it.

ksirtadnimeht
6/24/2012 11:05:59 AM | IP



I am of the opinion that one should always do what feels natural to them and not because they feel obligated based on advice or whatever. Do your own thing. Let the chips fall where they may. You sound like you have an awesome head on your shoulders and are very grounded in reality--in which case follow your own instincts.

cheers!


Right, thanks , that is sweet of you, but I could have Einstein's head, but Einstein in a maze is still Einstein in a maze... know what I mean? I am lost. But you make a great point... follow my instincts. I need to get out of my head (as awesome as it apparently is lol) and listen very carefully to my intuition, and then trust it. I did a few weeks ago, and I was convinced that she cared for me but needed time to herself... absolutely convinced, but then my thinking interrupts. I come back to this one thing... She has FB on her phone and she is permanently logged in. Now, deleting me would probably be too harsh a thing for a pisces to do, but if she blocked me then i'd have no idea that i've been blocked because all it would appear to me is that she isn't online, and I know she'd be aware of that, so it just makes me wonder, because if she really did want me out of her life then I don't think she'd want me to see her online all the time, she'd just want to be gone, right?
IntriguedScorp
6/24/2012 10:12:06 AM | IP
IntriguedScorp



Scorp with a Saggie Moon. That's all yo

Posted by ksirtadnimeht
I could send a little message to let her know i'm thinking of her, and maybe if I continue to do that gently every once in a while then she will see that I am for real, and that I do care about her, and i'll just leave it up to her as to whether she ever replies.


I am of the opinion that one should always do what feels natural to them and not because they feel obligated based on advice or whatever. Do your own thing. Let the chips fall where they may. You sound like you have an awesome head on your shoulders and are very grounded in reality--in which case follow your own instincts.

cheers!

 

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