aquarius male, leo female...never a dull moment
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|i am a leo, and have been with an aquarius male for about a year now. we live together. i have read all about aquarian tendencies, and he pretty much fits the description to a t. i can say that it has helped me out alot in understanding some of his annoying behavior, and probably saved our relationship a few times. |
anyways, this aquarius male was cheated on by a saggitarius female almost 2 years ago, and it really broke his heart. he was totally convinced that this chick was his lifelong companion, and she basically just packed up her stuff, moved out with another fella and didnt look back. ive always sensed that he still had feelings for her, but i didnt let it bother me too much.
recently, however, i found some emails that he had sent, telling her, overall, that he missed what they used to have and that it was hard for him. of course i was quite dismayed, and i did confront him about it, in a non tearful, calm way, and he basically told me that he loves me, no matter what, but was confused because although he doesnt want to be with his ex girlfriend, he still has some emotions for her. we had also just had a short breakup (i was the dumper) the month before, and he said that played a huge part in his confusion. the whole email thing went down about 2 weeks ago, and although my ego was severely bruised, i decided to trust him and let the issue go.
what do you guys think about this?
i feel really crappy about it, as this ex girlfriend was the epitome of what an aquarius wants; unconvential, independent, quirky, creative....i dont know, maybe im just making a mountain out of a molehill, but i would love to hear some thoughts on this from an astrological point of view...what is going through this guys head???
|Hi... sorry to hear about your troubles. But be very careful in handling this situation. I have always consider timelines a crucial part to measure relationships, decisions, reactions, etc. I always think about when did they say this or do this to see how a pattern fits. Into the whole sqeam of things. |
You say that you dumped him about a month ago, and within a period of 2 WEEKs, he wrote his ex instead of writing you. That does not sound confusing to me, it sounds straight forward and premeditated. I wonder if his ex reject him again, and the only thing he had to go back to was you. He really needs to think about whats important to him, you or his 2year-ago ex-girlfriend who dumped him.
It's a hard sitatution to deal with, but if you really love him, love will cover a multitude of transgressions. But you really need to talk to him about it.
|mcamera...unfortunately, all you can do is go on with your life and IF he comes back around to you, then you know that it was meant to be between the two of you. you need to give him space and time to think about the decision he needs to make...but it sounds like he has some unnecessary baggage that he is carrying around. and that is never fun to deal with. BUT, you don't want to be second best, do you? you are too good for that. good luck with whatever decision you make...|
btw...i am a cancer female who is dating an aqua male for 3 years now, and i have been through a lot of ups and downs. so, i can relate in a way!
|thanks for the replies, i know this probably seems like a no brainer, but i'd like to include some more info so i can drag as much info as possible out of you people =]|
the thing is, i have broken up with this guy several times. the breakups have never lasted long, as they've always been over, basically, him not stroking my ego. he is, after all, a very independent person and he dosen't pay me as much attention as i might like sometimes.
anyways, i would dump him, in a rage, and wait for him to come crawling back. however, i always ended up crawling back to HIM, because i like the guy, as a person, even if he dosen't kiss my ass all the time.
i read somewhere that aquarain males are very honest, and hate deception. the article said that if an aquarian guy is decieved, the next woman he involves himself with is in for a challenge.
another article said that if an aquarian dude DOES get into a serious relationship, he expects them to stick by him unconditionally.
with that being said, i can't help but wonder if those things play a part in this situation. i am learning to deal with some of the irritating things my boyfriend does, because i realize it's in his nature to do them. im trying to reason this out the same way i guess.
|I'm currently seeing an Aqua myself and I have never had a friend or a previous relationship with one before. Their relationship behavior is extremely confusing and I guess now after reading so many posts describing the same things I'm experiencing, I don't feel so bad. Or at least maybe I shouldn't take it so personally. Being an Aries, my reaction is much bolder and in your face than my water sisters Maybe it'll provide some insight for y |
The Aqua freeze blew in once I told him I wasn't ready to have sex with him. Things happened so fast that I still wanted to get to know him and he told me he was looking for a relationship himself so I didn't think he'd take it as such a big rejection. Boy, was I wrong! Then after his distancing act, I became less affectionate to which he had the nerve to accuse ME of acting different. So I called him one night to have it out & tell him the reason I wasn't being as affectionate was because of his distancing act. He had put up some major walls and I was tired of banging my head against it. He did not like that AT ALL. He politely told me that this was not a good time to talk because he was having a 'bad night' ???? I let it go and said I was sorry if something was wrong and hoped he would tell me. I assumed that it had nothing to do with us. But, a few hours later, he drunk dialed me. Alcohol acts like a truth serum because he spilled his guts. Basically, he told me he wanted me to call him (I don't tend to pursue or initiate things until a more established relationship). He wanted me to take more initiative in the relationship & once in a while his insecurity reared up where he'd say, "Sorry to bother you, I'll go now" and repeated that often even though I was being completely receptive to what he was saying and agreed that I would try to meet his needs.
Since then I have but he hasn't so much. We had another little thing were I told him it was obvious he was too busy for me, so he should just focus on whatever he was busy with and I'll fade out. Again, he doesn't want me to go but doesn't make a tremendous effort himself either. It is exasperating to say the least and I really don't know if I could put up with this much longer. So, I sympathize with you dealing with this for so long.
|Sorry if I went on too long. I think there is something to be said for acceptance as long as it isn't emotionally or mentally abusive for you. I think men in general do not recover as well from hurts as women do. That isn't a slam, I love men and have brothers so I know what they go through when they get hurt. It's pretty awful. What I think you & I have to do is to determine if ultimately the relationship is worth it. |
I've known tons of players who do what they know women want them to do just to get the women wrapped around their fingers. I'm sure an Aqua could do the same, they are quite charming & witty. So you have to think at least he's being himself and needs to be accepted and loved for the good qualities he brings, just like all of us.
|mccamera...you are looking to your aqua to stroke your ego, and you shouldn't. you need to find happiness within yourself. you should never look to any man to make you feel better, give you compliments, or stroke your ego. bottom line...|
AND, your aqua will NEVER satisfy you in that way. if it's that important for you to be with someone who IS going to stroke your ego, you should probably find someone else to be with.
|i am not super leo or anything, i really dont crave the spotlight or expect anyone to worship the ground i walk on. and i most certainly don't think that i'm some kind of goddess...that is really not my style. i am more insecure than anything, and sometimes my aquarius boyfriend plays that up in me, unintentionally i believe. he actually is quite loving with me most of the time...eh, whatever, im not gonna dump the guy, i just cant bring myself to do it...|
|i understand that you are insecure...that is what i was trying to get at in my other posts. but, you cannot blame him for your insecurity...that is your doing. and i am sure he is a great guy that treats you well. don't break up with him, but just take a step back and think things over...sounds like both of you need a little breather.|
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