What to do? (please respond ASAP)
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|I work with a sag (made a previous post about him)|
Everything was all good, up until a few days ago. I'd given him my number before I went on a cruise. And he texted me a few times, but since I was on water half the time, I didn't have service.
When he texted me, it was from some yahoo mobile thing. So I didn't actually have his number. A friend/coworker (that knew I liked him), told me that he kept asking about me, like when was I coming back & whatnot (even though I told him the specific date).
Then one day I asked him if he liked the manager & in his response he said "no. I like you VERY MUCH". So me being ... a person, I thought he meant he liked me like that. Especially considering that after I came back, he gave me his actual cell phone number twice.
Then we were texting last night, & at some point he was like, I am at the movies I can't text anymore. So I text him again 3 hours later, telling him that I needed to ask him something. He responded by saying that he was driving, but would text me when he wasn't busy. By 11:30 he hadn't responded, so I text him again (I couldn't help it, I was bored.)
No response. Couldn't sleep last night. woke up @ 8 text him again. and again. and again...
I know that sounds stupid/desperate but I just wanted to talk to him. (and I knew at the time that I should have waited for a response before continuously texting him).
anyway when he finally does respond, he said that he was with his girlfriend (which he had denied previously), and that's why he didn't respond, but then he ignored my texts when I started (in his words) demanding a response.
Then he says he likes me as a friend and he didn't mean to lead me on, if he did (everyone at my job thinks/thought he liked me). Then he swears that he never said he didn't have a girlfriend. But I KNOW he did. I remember the specific things he said, how the conversation went down, where we were, hell I even remember the damn day.
He said he didn't know I liked him & that he thought we were just friends. And that he gave me his number because he thought I was a cool person (then why the hell did he invite me to hang out with his kids???)
Anyway, what I'm wondering now, is what should I do (at work) & How should I react around him? Should I ignore him? Should I act like this never happened? I mean I don't know if he even wants to talk to me anymore.
Hell I don't know if I want to talk to him.
I think a friendship is out of the question now.
What say you?
|You should steer clear of him. |
There doesn't have to be any hard feelings, you can still be cordial to him. Just don't waste your time on it anymore.
He definitely did give you mixed signals. He'll probably keep flirting with you if you let him.
Which I wouldn't...this situation reeks of drama. You work together. No bueno. :/
Honestly, he was probably in a fight and/or not getting the attention he wanted from his girlfriend when he was initiating contact with you. Now that they're all kosher, he wants you to back off so it doesn't cause him more problems.
He'll say he was only ever interested in you as a friend, and you misinterpreted his signals. But that's utter bullbutter.
& you both know it. So now, just walk away with some dignity. Hold your head high, nose in the air.
If you don't realize you're too good to be his Plan B, he'll make you that.
|If you want me to hide that after you read it, just say the word chica|
|okay, I un-hid the post.|
I'm just really confused by him. If I makes a difference, he is 41.
We've spoken through facebook. (although I'm not aware if he knows that I deleted him as a friend).
The one day we were texting & he didn't respond I sent him a message on facebook asking all the questions I wanted the answers to. When he finally did respond to my texts I told him to just ignore the message.
He then responded the next mourning with a long ass message. I don't remember everything he wrote, & I don't feel like re-reading it, but I remember him saying that he doesn't like to talk about who he's with b/c people start talking & he doesn't want to get involved with the chit chat @ work. He says that I shouldn't assume things, or make things up to fit a situation (which btw, I didn't do) & that he went through that when he was married (to a fellow scorp & an aries or leo) & if he was looking for a relationship, he wouldn't be into that. And then at the end he said he still wanted to be my friend (Just to be clear, I didn't ask him if he wanted to be, he just volunteered the info). He also said that at his last job he had female friends that had his # & he had his.
So I respond back. Saying I thought he liked me (and so did others) because he said he liked me, in comparison to another female. Like, how else was I supposed to take that? And about the phone thing. I thought I was the one that misunderstood that, because I don't give out my number to people. (all the people that have it @ my job, except him have it because it is posted; there's only about 15 people at my job) But some people I asked said they would be highly upset if their SO got a number from someone of the opposite sex after they were dating. In all honesty as it pertains to work, he doesn't need to have my number. Then I told him that he reminds me of on of my exes and that's why I flipped out. Then I told him about the situation when he said he was dating
He responded the next am. saying that him & his gf have no intention of getting married & they joke that they'll be dating forever. And that I was riding him hard about things that didn't/shouldn't matter (asking about if he likes te other girl maybe? him not texting me back-although, what I wanted to know was important to me) Then he said again that he wanted to be friends & he would see me at work. (but I'm off today & tomorrow)
To add, I don't know what kind of relationship they have. They've been together for about 4 years But I don't know if they actually lived together. (ATM he lives with his parents-not to long ago his dad got cancer-it's in remission now)
They only have the chance to see each other Mon-Wed as he works 10hr days the rest of the week
Also when I was first texting him, he was at the movies with her, but texting me.
I'm just confused as to why it seems like he wants to be friends so bad. We've known each other for about 2 months.
I flipped out on him.
According to him he's only interested in being my friend.
Most guys I know would stay far away from a girl that flipped out on them, especially if they're not dating.
I just know that I won't be going up to him to start conversations like I have in the past, but I won't be rude & say hi/bye after he says it.
|oh em gee.|
I forgot to add my response to his last message.
I text (instead of messaging on facebook) "*Do not respond* all of this could have been avoided, if you would have responded to my initial text asking if I took you wrong when you said you liked me. if you would have said yes, I would have fallen back & been on my way. & we wouldn't have this misunderstanding. You said you didn't text because you were going to see me & would have found a way to talk to me to respond, but you didn't. And that was something that I needed to know"
I haven't actually responded to any of his statements about us being friends. i'm still on the fence about whther or not I want to be his friend
|well after these last few days I don't have any interest in him like that anymore.|
I haven't found anyone that I'm interested in like that so I'll just continue being single
I just wanted advice on whether or not to be his friend (hence the last paragraph in the original post)
|my last post was in response to pigeonpie|
my friend said something similar, Dynamite. Either he wants to have sex, or he was interested, but realized the situation when I flipped out. (I forgot to mention that he did say he wouldn't get with anyone he works with. Or maybe he said hookup with... hmmm)
|He wants to be friends because he wants you hanging around for a backup plan or a booty call the next time he's on the outs with his girl or even just the next time he's not getting enough attention. |
Trust me. It's a Sag thing. I know what I'm talking about right now.
|:/ not our best trait. But I'm being honest... most of us have done this at one point or another. |
& the male Sagis are dogs...
|If you like his company, sure be his friend, but don't start reading into his cutesy bullbutter and let him suck you back in. |
He will flirt with you like it's his job, and then turn it around on you and tell you you misread his signals because you want something that just isn't there. :/
FFS, don't be Plan B.
|I may be a scorpio, but I'm NOT the type to be someone's booty call.|
I honestly don't want to be his friend, but I kind of feel like I don't have a reason not to.
But I don't plan on carrying on conversations with him.
If we do progress to being friends again & he said something flirtatious I would call him out on it, on the spot.
Briana what isn't a sag's best trait?
The funny thing is, this man is by no means a catch. I only liked him because of the resemblance to an ex. Physically.
but he is a 2 time divorcee (he said he worked too much), has 4 kids & has NO money (he's been laid off from his last 2 jobs, was unemployed for over a year & said he used up all his severance pay & most of his 401K). He's had a vasectomy (so he can't have more kids) & doesn't want to get married again. :/
also @ 41 years old, would he really still be looking for attention?