Scorpio Man Moods
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Posted by MoonMan
LOL - true!
I'm only a Scorp moon, but my Libra self would probably be a bit more relaxed about the pulling away given that we do it too. I'm guessing it will probably ease with time while he works on his stuff. Just stay true and trustworthy which I am sure you are. He probably doesn't want to be fixed (most men don't even if we think they need it!!!)
|I am guilty of mood sometimes. It drives my libra wife crazy. I dont mean to shut her out, but sometimes i need to deal with my issues alone. It's nothing a person can do really to end that mood. All ppl can do is respect our feelings and let us work it out. I try not to slip into it, but i find that it's usually when i am dealing with a lot, or if i have much on my mind. Scorpio man is used to internalizing; we're the last sign that will come to others with our problems, be it a wife, shrink, or friend. Even when we do trust you, its still very hard to get out our feelings. They are intense and we dont want to run risk of scaring ppl off. |
Best way to handle the mood is to love him through it. When you see he's in one of his funks, give him a loving hug and let him have his thoughts. Kiss his forehead and let him know you're there if he needs you. Sometimes people want to talk us out of things; that only agitates us after a while. Yes, trust he will come out of it so no worries there.
He might slip in and out of moods when he's soul searching or something is weighing heavy on him. But if he's a man that cares about your feelings too, he will learn how to communicate and not shut you out so much when he feels a certain way. It will happen from time to time, but not frequently if he understands how it effects you. I dont think he's doing it to test you; I never get this way to test my wife. It just happens and I wish it didnt. That's why deep down I love her even more for being able to put up with this side of me. Im sure he appreciates you too.
When I'm moody and withdrawn, i talk to no one. I ususally am by myself doing things that get my mood back right again. If my mood is due to a problem, i am working to solve it. If i just need to retreat, i will catch up on reading, sports, video games. at times i just need to think and sort some things out. his mood is temporary and he should be fine if you let him work it out on his own.
|CaringCancer, there's nothing I can add. The posts above are right on the money. Please read what they said carefully because their answers are right on the money.|
Well done, guys.
|I was married to scorpio for 5 years. After the first few years I learned when his moods hit to not take them personally. Every now and again I would clarify, "are you upset with me or is there anything I can do to help?". Sometimes if he was in one for too long ( don't judge, I know this is very childish of me) I would throw my own fit and pretend to be upset about something. If I knew he was just grumpy for no reason this ALWAYS worked to snap him out of it. As soon as he thought I was upset with him or giving him an attitude he would forget why he was so grumpy in the first place. It just worked. Sigh. scorpios...|
Posted by DazedScorpPosted by CaringCancer
This about sums it up Lol..Specially #3. That's me all day LOL.
|Maybe some personal information is needed to understand everything.. Or maybe not.|
When I am "moody", whether it is angry, sad, or any other less than pleasant emotion that causes me to be withdrawn, there are two parts to it. Part 1 is that is how I am feeling, often I am thrown into this mood by conflicting thoughts, fears, hopes, etc. etc. etc. I am usually very aware of my emotional state and how I am presenting myself, and I use that to see who notices, and what their reaction is. The best analogy I have for my own personal "mood swings" is that my mind is like a maze and a minefield, there are many ways through and some are trapped, If you find your way through once you can probably do it again.
In other words, I typically find myself looking to see if the other person responds favorably, or not. If they do, then I take more notice, open up more, and talk about deeper and deeper topics until eventually you hit the soft spots. If you get there you are golden.
The mood swings will always occur (as far as I can tell).
3. (the only numbered one).
The way I have always described my own mood swings, they typically come from a kind of mental static/white noise that I can not quite describe. It causes emotional confusion and that is when I become withdrawn trying to figure out the cause of everything, These times I am usually so introverted I fail to recognize what is going on around me. So this is the other half of the mood swings. When I realize my mood (Which usually happens fairly quickly) I then tend to experiment with those around me, genuinely trying to both root out the cause, and see how others react. I find that when people meet my expectations in these times my mood goes away fairly suddenly.
|Continued - So when the appetizer came, he handed me a plate, as if to share with me. I put the plate back, with a grin on my face. (I know this it a lot of detail, but I feel its elemental to the story.) Me putting the plate back launched him into a temper tantrum. Maybe it was the bloodies on the empty stomach, who knows, but he was very angry that I took him seriously about wanting all of them. To me, it was more of a little joke, we joke dryly all the time. He decided he wanted to leave, and we left the restaurant without dinner, and he walked ahead of me to his train station. Shortened version, he left the city without me. He wouldn't answer his phone when I tried to find him, but one time he did. He told me that we are done, that he doesn't care at all, never did, and that it's over. OVER AN APPETIZER GUYS? What is wrong with this picture? He hasn't tried to contact me, text, call, etc. I've texted him an apology, and told him that I love him, and left it at that. What is his deal? Did he mean what he said? Is this REALLY the end of it all? After all this time and discovery, bonding and sharing? Why the freeze out? I am devastated.|
|the appetizer was a trigger. he probably has other issues with you he's not talking about and was almost spoiling for a fight with you to give him the excuse to storm off like a knobhead. done it myself tho...my marriage nearly ended over a bar of soap once, lol.|
|Thanks R1g0r. I don't know what issues he could have. He's supremely happy with me around, in fact, feels very attached to me and tells me I'm his angel. A teacher to him. Literally what happened could have been reconciled in a 5 minute discussion, in my eyes. Do you think he really meant it's over? The reason I say this is because the past week has been amazing. We have REALLY connected.|
|He's scared. He's pushing you away so he's not dependent on you, or his feelings for you. It has him in a tailspin. |
It's not the reason that set the fight, it's his feelings. Don't take the fight 'seriously', but take the fuel behind it serious. Smoke and mirrors if you will.
Keep trying. Regardless if he wants to be left alone or not, if you don't try somewhat he's going to take that as well that you don't care. And whatever you do, don't put him down or the ridiculousness of the fight. He'll take it that you're putting his thoughts and feelings down. He's hiding behind the fight. So in his mind, it's all serious. He's eye glazed RATM too.
If you hear nothing back after a few days, give it a rest and try again later in a few more days. Then if still nothing, put your foot down and nicely but firmly tell him you've tried, you love him and if and when he wants to talk to you, to contact you.
|Thanks Ocean - I'm sorry, but does RATM mean that he's angry? (like Raging?) I am unfamiliar with that term! LOL. I have to think that you are right - he's REALLY let go recently, opened up, and told me that when he's alone. all he does is think and count the minutes till we can be together again, because I calm him. To me that shows dependence. I mean I've seen the worst in him and held on to him regardless. As much as he can be immature in his temper/reactions, he's also very smart and I can't see this ending over this. But I am also realistic and don't want to hold out hope - I hear that when a Scorpio says it's over, it really is.|
|RATM = right at the moment |
Yes, BUT in this situation, eyes glazed over not meaning rage, but meaning he's not seeing anything else right now but protecting himself.
It does get tricky, that's why you can't give up. He may end up telling you to leave him alone and in a sense he means it so that he can have space ... needs it to sort through those feelings, the fight, start convincing himself he doesnt need you, etc.
BUT in another way deep down he doesnt want you to give up and leave him alone. Not when his feelings for you are strong. He wants to know you love him as much as he loves you. He wont tell you that. he will depend, count on, fingers crossed and pray that you won't give up. Even if he says 'ef off'. That you get it and him without him having to tell you. It's about becoming one with his mind. In his mind, if you are serious about him AND your relationship, AND also that you care about him enough, he is expecting you to know this. To get it all on your own. Without you having to be told.
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