Virgo and anger management.

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8/12/2010 10:34:47 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I



So anyway, I brought the first 3 seasons of Niptuck few years ago. There was one of the main characters Dr. Sean. Dr. Sean was a mild mannered surgeon, very boring, very family oriented, and not willing to show his emotions. Due to many of the events in the show, he started to show really aggressive traits. But all of them were self destructive and violent.


To me, this is what a Virgo is. A Virgo is that clean cut man, but with a lot of hidden darkness. A lot of issues of pride, hostility, and restraints that he doesn't address or talk about. A Virgo mask these things, as he typically know they're not healthy. But at some point in a Virgos life, he completely explodes and he becomes what many people say,"A different person". There are many things I've noticed about Virgos. I don't think Virgos have an easy life. While on the surface they may seem to do a lot right, there are many things they do wrong. Its not hard for a Virgo to have a great career, and if he's good enough, he can be finacially well off fairly quickly. Virgos have a lot of discipline. And this comes easy for a Virgo, as worldly issues such as career management are things Virgos handle pretty well.

On the emotional end, Virgos do not handle this well. And as such, it's common for Virgos to suppress themselves when it comes to emotional issues. Virgos methodically and systematically learn train themselves to block out displaying any particular emotional declaration. In this way, the Virgo maintain control. And early in a Virgos life, they reinvent themselves and create a "face" for the outside world.

cont...
8/12/2010 10:42:13 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

In this, many people learn a Virgo due to his "front face" or I would say interface for people to interact with. He studies human reactions, and base his dealings with people on crude social methodology. Utilizing his incredibly analytical skill, a Virgo typically always "respond" the right way to situations. But in this, there is a downfall.

Emotions fall into grey areas, and with such, some things in life aren't limited to the "proper response". A Virgo, being the logical creature he is believes in merits, as this is the way the way typically work. But emotions rarely work this way, and as such a Virgo may do everything right, but they become boring to their partners. And in such, people find Virgos unimaginative but great people. This leaves a footprint with Virgos. But Virgos, in their coping skills "keep it moving" and ignore the situations and go on with their lives. They rarely give themselves enough time to grieve or emotionalize the situation, they vouch to simply ignore it.


However, all of these darker traits of a Virgo start to reach a boiling point. And with such, a Virgo just snaps, and becomes indulgent. It's not hard to find Virgos who are abusive, engage in drug abuse, or get involved in dangerous lifestyles. A Virgo really just start to self destruct, and his anger and hidden hostility takes over. Has anyone noticed this about a Virgo? Do Virgos show very big extremes?

In building the perfect front face for society, Virgos lose who they are. And in doing this they never figure out who they are. Virgo their anger, and their destructive natures is the road to self-awareness. But it's a hard road.


8/12/2010 10:55:47 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

Every sign goes through something similar to it Gemtaur. Pisces run from their issues and trap themselves in a world of delusion until they're forced to face their issues, and look at themselves in the mirror. Aries have to learn to submit pride and tackle their self-indulgence and anger. It is a personal road, but it's nice to have someone hold your hand while you walk down it. you will probably go through something similar, sooner or later in your life. The people around you won't be able to intervene much. But when people have struggles, the best you can do is offer support and understanding.
8/12/2010 11:09:00 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

You have to make a personal choice in this situation. The things he do to you and his life, can you deal with it? Does it affect you in a negative way? Are you ultimately happy (this is important). If you feel you can't deal with this, then you have to let him go, or else he'll pull you into his mess. I had to make the same decision years ago with a Pisces woman who was going through her own personal struggles. When I finally broke up with her, I asked myself if I was happy. And I wasn't. She didn't make me feel happy, even if I had strong feelings for her.


Are you with him because you love him or do you simply feel you love him? Are you with him because you care, or because you feel obligated? All of these are important questions that you must ask yourself.


At some point he is going to see himself messing up and do something about it. Will you be with him when this happen? You have to understand, this can happen a week from now or 10 years from now? Are you with him because you're waiting for him to change? If so, you'll only cause yourself misery and he may never change.


If your love for him is strong and undeniable, then it make be worth the scars. But it's something you have to resolve with yourself.
8/12/2010 11:26:43 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

She's coming by tomorrow. She's somewhat back in the picture. Not sure where it'll lead though. Shes very typical of a Sag, but she's a nice person. However, I think she has an issue of seeing me as being too nice, and would love to see more my more aggressive qualities. I think I'm going to talk with her about this if she comes through tomorrow.
8/13/2010 12:58:28 AM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

aquilas, that's what happen with a lot of Virgos. Virgos aren't afraid of emotions, as a matter of fact they admire them. The real problem is, Virgos do not trust their emotions, and have a need to conceal them. When they show anger, it's extreme anger, and they know it hurts people around them. So it's better for them to pretend that they don't have it. Virgos simply don't take emotional risk, because they don't want to put themselves out there.


One thing I learned about the Sag, and the Aries I was kind of dealing with before her was that there is nothing wrong with that. I held the Sag while she cried and I consoled her. Years earlier, I wouldn't know to do that, or bring myself to do that. But I realize that my issues with women is opening up to them, and I understood that there is no way I could connect to a woman unless I was willing to be there for her in her vulnerable moments. I still have issues with expressing my emotions, and I still have many phobias. But I've learned to have courage and be brave. I tell myself that I can deal with it, and that gives me the strength to put myself out there more.

Your ex Virgo will get tired of being alone. The great thing is that he is willing to verbally admit his issues, which is a big step for Virgos. But then again, Aries and Sags are more aggressive than an Aries would be. One of the cutest things the Sag told me was this:


"Hold me, it's easy, just put your arms around me like so. See how hard was that?"

8/13/2010 1:04:38 AM | More
sorti-fantastic poney



Born on august 28. Here

Hmm...
8/13/2010 1:37:37 AM | More
sorti-fantastic poney



Born on august 28. Here

The user who posted this message has hidden it.

8/13/2010 1:37:50 AM | More
sorti-fantastic poney



Born on august 28. Here

Although my experience didn\\\'t reach to an extreme, I have found a link or connection of the Virgo male and Siddhartha. If I can name a man to journey into the depths of hell, I would can simply refer back to Siddhartha because he was a sponge that needed to learn the values, the emotions, the life-style, and the obsessions of the common man. He fell into many extremes, but he later understood his quest, his home, and his problems. He was a part of his father as how his son was apart of him, and he had to face the fact that his son hated him far more than any being can anathematize. Siddhartha had lovers (sexual encounters), lust for power and money (greed).

He like many virgos: \\\"envied them [for] ... the sense of importance with which they lived their lives, the depth of their pleasure and sorrows, the anxious but sweet happiness of their continual power to love. These people were always in love with themselves, with their children.\\\"

But he couldn\\\'t get over the burning ache of his son: \\\"It was true that he had never fully lost himself in another person to such an extent as to forget himself; he had never undergone the follies of love for another person. He had never been able to do this, and it had then seemed to him that this was the biggest difference between him and the ordinary people...[now] He was madly in love.\\\"
8/13/2010 1:40:01 AM | More
sorti-fantastic poney



Born on august 28. Here

Just something, in case it ever helps you Mr. defense...But I understand what you are talking about...
8/13/2010 3:57:26 PM | More
CLCNY30

female

Creative Virgo

Posted by Mr. Defense
aquilas, that's what happen with a lot of Virgos. Virgos aren't afraid of emotions, as a matter of fact they admire them. The real problem is, Virgos do not trust their emotions, and have a need to conceal them. When they show anger, it's extreme anger, and they know it hurts people around them. So it's better for them to pretend that they don't have it. Virgos simply don't take emotional risk, because they don't want to put themselves out there.


100% on point.

I made a mistake yesterday of telling a Taurus how much I cared about them last night...and I got a "...I understand" in return, and I swear to God...I could have literally balled up my fists and punched myself in the heart repeatedly for opening up and telling him--and the funny thing is that I would not have been as hurt as that nonchalant response from him made me feel.

A Leo friend, who's always keeping my spirits high--I love her to death, she's my sister from another mister, she said,

"Awww, he doesn't know what to say back--he's probably blushing over there, don't feel bad--you probably made his day "

And sure enough, just as I flung my phone down in anger, I got another text from him saying,

"miss ya. all the time."

I :")'d all over.

It's hard for us, we don't like rejection--so we feel that if we don't put ourselves out there with our hearts held out in our bare hands in front of us, we won't feel pain, but we still do, lol.

We still do.

8/13/2010 4:14:40 PM | More
CLCNY30

female

Creative Virgo

That's a hard pill to swallow, gem

I hear you, I get you, and I know you're right, but God...

Saying I will try, and actually trying...2 different animals to me...

I'm just way too f'n emotional, and get hurt too easily. It's really why I distance myself from people, both physically and mentally, but they keep trying to pry their way in!! Why???? LOL. I give off EVERY vibe and sign that I don't want to be bothered, but people still approach me, and I feel obligated to be friendly...

*sigh*

I just turn my phone off on the weekends sometimes, just because I don't want to deal with others. They're determined to change me into an extrovert, and they don't understand that it's just not me.

The One will understand though, I know he will. He won't seek to "fix" me, or change me, but will just show me alternatives that I can take or not, but will tell and show me that he'll love me either way. That will open me up enough to consider the options.
8/13/2010 4:51:22 PM | More
CLCNY30

female

Creative Virgo

Posted by gemtaur
They see you for you are: a sensitive, beautiful soul. Just like I did despite your caustic responses those weeks back.

They're trying to tell you that it's okay to allow yourself to be vulnerable. But go at your own pace. Go as slowly as you are comfortable with.

There's a Zen saying: Jump. And the net will appear.


Awww! :") ty so much. I'm glad you were able to see--I don't mean to come off rudely, I just been through so many reasons to be defensive in my life, people trying to control me, people abusing me that I automatically put up my defenses whenever I feel harassed or threatened. Ty for your words.

Jump and the net will appear...hm...that sound scary and wonderful all at the same time, lol.

Well, I'm open to him, it's up to him now. He's in an unhappy relationship, it's up to him to decide if he would like to continue on with it, despite how it's slowly killing him (he's told me he accepts extra hours at work just to get away from her...wow...) or explore something different. The option is his...but I won't stop letting him know that I care for him more than he could ever know.
8/13/2010 4:52:29 PM | More
CLCNY30

female

Creative Virgo

Posted by catguy
Posted by gemtaur
They see you for you are: a sensitive, beautiful soul. Just like I did despite your caustic responses those weeks back.

They're trying to tell you that it's okay to allow yourself to be vulnerable. But go at your own pace. Go as slowly as you are comfortable with.

There's a Zen saying: Jump. And the net will appear.



Does that include fishnet stockings? Just curious...


and stilettos

I mean, if you're gonna do the thing, do it right, no?
8/13/2010 6:43:59 PM | More
Mr. Defense

35 years old male from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania  

I can defend myself against anything. I

I disagree. I believe any given water sign is way more negative than Virgos. Virgos CAN be negative, but they do know how to have a good time.
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