Virgo man in love with Aries woman
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|Is there a Virgo man who has ever been involved with Aries woman... or can someone post their views on this realtion....|
Sorry my last post on the other board wasn't helpful. I tried. If you don't mind, keep us updated. Well, I can't speak for everyone else, but, I'm interested in updates.
As for your question about the dynamic between Aries and Virgo in a relationship, there's a book by Linda Goodman entitled Love Signs. She gives her take on relationship combinations between all the signs, even delving into the man and woman of each combination. Okay, that was clear as steel. Let me give an example. She'll give an overview of Aries and Virgo relationship. Then she'll give her take on Aries Woman and Virgo Man, then Aries Man and Virgo Woman.
I stress, take what she says with a grain of salt. Using only sun signs, purely stereotypical images of the signs without regard to other factors that make up a whole person, I find the book to be an expansive excursion into naivity and unbridled presumptiveness, BUT, it's keeps interest. I like her writing style. Take what fits and leave the rest.
VirgoSquared is on spot with a great explantion of the signs by Linda Goodman and a fascinating writer she is! Check it out forsure...in the meantime I pulled this info. off another site...hope it helps in someway - again with using the advice of VS...this pertains only to the sun signs so take it with a dash of pepper
I am Aries, My Lover is Virgo
Do your friends keep telling how very different you are from your Virgo? You've known this all along. If your relationship seems to be working, it is a testament to your good nature and determination to succeed.
There are some things to be aware of. Your Virgo lover is very industrious, just as you are, but you both assert your energy in different ways. Virgos wake up in the morning and know what they expect to accomplish by the end of the day. If they don't finish, then just like the little Energizer bunny, they keep on going, and going, and going 'till they're done and satisfied with their performance. They don't need a boss to push them; their ambition is strong enough on its own. They wouldn't dream of disappointing others (or themselves) by not coming through on what they've said they'll do. Living up to promises is a big deal to Virgos.
While you see the big picture, have more courage, and are better at networking, your lover is a wizard at details and organization. With your sweetheart at your side, you can become stronger. You will have a better chance of seeing your dreams come true -- task-oriented Virgo will remind you of things yet to do and support your efforts 100% of the time. They are also more flexible and can present you with options when you face an obstacle or a crisis.
Yet Virgos see flaws where you may see none and, of course, they have a way of always being right. Sometimes you may feel like you're with a taskmaster and feel like nothing will ever be perfect enough to please your sweetie. Realize that your lover is not challenging your abilities but polishing up your style. Your lover wants to make sure you shine out there in the world! Keep your ego in check. If you take note of your Virgo's advice, you'll soon be very, very successful. I am convinced that behind every phenomenal Aries is a caring, attentive Virgo.
In bed, you are the take-charge type, while your Virgo is more reserved and willing to let you set the pace. This description is not tied to gender. Aries women can be downright thrilling in bed because they know what they want and go for it. Virgo is an ideal partner for Aries because they not only speak up (ruled by talkative Mercury, how could they not?) but they describe gently, with care, what they need you to do. If communication is nine-tenths of compatibility, you two have it made. Still, the chemistry between you could use some tempering. Your Virgo needs to be soothed a little after that long day of work in order to get in the proper mood. You can't get lazy with the task of soothing them down, even if you've been together for decades. Your impulse to jump right in will leave your lover a wreck. The seduction tactics you choose are going to be very important -- if you get it right, the result will be a delectable dance as you each try your very best to please the other.
|Me thinks I desire a Virgo.....that sounds so yummy! Are Virgos selfish lovers?|
|Hi Virgo Sqaured,|
My friend your advice can never go wrong... i have made my decision ... will not call him (it hurts when i say this)... but heart keeps going bad to old memories where we had some good time... may be he is over it.... he didn't call me ever since the last time that was 12th of Nov (hehe i rem he date too)... but then yes not every thing ends the way you want it to end. the only fact that keeps bugging me is what must have happened for him to take such a sudden decision... i try hard to forget everything then i am back to day when the desire to know the answer is strong... i feel like calling him and asking what has happened ... we were never in a relation ... damn it why the hell didnt he expain it ... may be some part in me still want him..
But as you said my friend he has the right to make his decision... if it has to end it has to ....... though i will have my emotional bout at times... and the quest to understand virgo's will go on
You're going to hate me after this, but I've done the same thing with friends when I've felt neglected, wronged, or when I thought the friendship was more stress than it was worth, and perceived the relationship as being unsalvageable. If it helps any, one of them I actually missed. Ignoring ordinary, I actually told her I missed her before fading away. It may have been subtly put, but for me that was significant, I've never said that to anyone before or since. I said it mildly because I would've picked up on it if someone expressed it . . . oh damn. Maybe not. It just hit me that she did express it. A few times in fact. It shunned overtness, but still, the sentiment stood there forlorn and questioning. She's not one to put herself out their either . . . insecurity's jumping up and down with the trophy on this one. Thanks Reka. I'll call her.
In my case I can explain this behavior, I don't know if it'll apply to your Virgo, but here it is. I'm an invincibility buff. Impervious to wear and tear, fatigue, stress, the elements, the need for food, air, water; from the outside looking in I could live in space absent the suit. The catch is the "S" on my chest is plastic, hell, biodegradable paper even, but I'm not comfortable in letting it flake and crumble when illuminated by reality, letting deep seeded insecurity shine unabashed. Vulnerability isn't fun. Don't worry, I'm getting to the point. "Need" falls in this category, it's a vulnerability. To tell someone what you're perceiving as wrong, what's missing in a relationship with another, shows a "need." Missing something implies you need it to suffice, to be content, to be happy. I'm not comfortable expressing that, so given a choice between talking about what I'm feeling, be that neglect or hurt or even stress, it's easier to take my coat and hat and leave without noding "good day." Leaving the other, if they actually care that I'm gone, wondering what happened. No one has ever asked what happened, and barring one person, I probably wouldn't explain so . . . I may miss aspects of the relationship, but stubbornness has to suffice.
Reading some of the post here, taking note of the effect this has on people, I'm actually trying to change this. Even realizing the effect it has on me; loneliness. Earth school; life is learning, understanding, and growth; I'm trying.
|Okay, that was supposed to be ended VirgoSquared.|
I guess the personal nature of the post distracted me. Any way . . .
|hey Virgo Sqaured,|
You sound so much like my Virgo....For a moment i thought its him.... yeah may be he was not able to express what he wanted to and the times when he said it ... i thought he was lying to me... You know what, I dont know if this is with all virgo's but there was a way of him saying bye... he used to make me feel so special you would feel that ur the only person on his mind and then reality would strikes again......
It was not that i liked him at the fisrt go... it was developed when he used to speak earlier he always came out to be a caring person... he wanted to know small details in my life... i never told him but i liked the attention.. I am not a person who can speak my feelings.... if i like someone i would not take the initiative to tell that person i like him.
The problem with me is i just cant forget that good side to him... its easy to hate (you jus have to remember all the hurt that person has caused to you ) but with him i cant even do that.... may be i can never ever hate him... Time is the best heal.. this would heal too.... When we first met i was not meeting him he persuaded me for almost 15days and i said yes.. may be that was a wrong decision ... and there would a lot many maybe's
At times i feel i should forget all this and call him... ask him now as he must have been in a better state of mind (its been 2 week since we last spoke), but then im scared atleast now i have left it on a good note. what if he again say there is no issue and start ignoring me again ... i would be back to sqaure one.
I dont see him online these days ... may be he has removed me from his messenger or he is really busy... the earlier seems to be more likely. Even when im writing this post i feel like just calling him and asking him what happened... its just the arien in me who wants to have a answer no matter how ... we just cant let go.
Also he called me last and i didnt return his call ( the same call where he said i will call you over the weekend) and knowing that he has hurted me he must not be feeling like going back on his word
Believe me this sucks.... Im in state of constant confusion... Keep writing... I like reading your post... Do send me a reply on my current state of mind and how do i tame it
I really admire the way you can take hold of your life and move on.... i want to do it too... but with me there was never a major fight which could have made him take this decission..... You know how it is.... just a day before that we were ok talking to each other and the next day again on chat he asked me where am i (I had not told him that i am coming To US).
May be i didnt want to get into my routine of calling him and all... also he is never open as to what is happening in his personal life with me ... He was like if you are in U and if you havent told me... I will be really upset with you.. and then he just stopped talking and the whole saga...
As i told you i will get there too may be it will take some time ... but i will get there
You know, people keep telling me I sound like their particular Virgo, which is kind of scary, since they follow with how the feel their Virgo screwed them over. I hang my hat on the notion that to think a certain way doesn't necessarily predetermine a particular action. Like, you can have ten people that all hold the same thought, but the way each act on that thought may be different. Thinking the same way, different responses. At least that's what I'm hoping any way. It would hurt to be the spark that has some crimson Pisces or Scorpio female drizzling their tears and tempers on these boards, peppered with "that a**hole" and "that insensitive bastard." Guilt would be a shark.
As for you, your vibration feels better. I mean I can sense a distinct difference between the first post of yours I read and this one. Don't get me wrong, I'm feeling a sadness about it, but it's, an optimistic sadness, if that, makes, any sense at all. I don't know, it's just the impression I get. You can't hate him? Why would you want to? Be glad there was a good side, that's kind of the point of relationships. You say he used to make you feel special, for him to make you feel that way, I'm sure you made him feel the same way. To note, wanting to know what happened has nothing to do with you being Aries, it's just human nature. I can think of a few times where I wanted to show up at someone's door at 3:08 AM in the rain, banging on the door, "What happened, Man! Talk to me, what I do!" A neighbor yells, "Shut up!" I yell an explicative, the cops come, it gets bad. Or send the needy single line email, "Talk to me. Please?" It's odd the way people connect and get so familiar with those connections they essentially need the other. This band, Silverstein, there's a lyric in one of their songs, "You're giving up on me. I blamed, myself to sleep tonight. . ." It applies, because when someone leaves, it feels that way. Whether you've did anything wrong or not, if feels like they've given up on you, and when you don't know why, you blame yourself . . . well, I do anyway. So, I believe you. I know it sucks.
You know, I'm a Virgo, but I do have my moon in Aries in the eighth, so I do understand a lot of what you're feeling. In fact, I have few emotional propellants in my chart, the twin Virgins just mute their external expression. The cosmic joke of balance, like mixing pillows and nails. Yeah, there maybe a dynamic balance, but it's not like the warm balance of caramel and chocolate. Another thing with me is my focus is singular. I'm not good at multitasking. If I'm working on a project, or exploring a curiosity, that's my focus. Conversely, if it's a person, again, that's my focus. When that focus goes awry from absence, it's difficult to deal with, BUT, that need isn't going to be expressed outwardly at all. Going to feel it, not going to show it. I put this part in to answer your question as to how to tame it, which is, I don't have an answer. I don't think people can control what they feel, only how they respond to those feelings. We're pretty much relegated to experiencing them until time blunts the edge. If you call him though, and he ignores you . . . that would be so brutal. You're going to feel like hell. That fire is pushing you to call him, interrogate; but what's the point? Aside from intellectual curiosity, on the off chance he responds, will anything he tell you suffice; make you feel better? I think you're looking for Valid Reason, but that cat . . . seeing him is like someone seeing Elvis eating a Twinkie at the bus stop in biker shorts. Yeah, the bloated Elvis. There may have been a guy there, but it wasn't Elvis. Conversely, you may get a reason, but in all likely hood, you won't see it as valid. As much as it would hurt and suck, if I was you, I'd let him be. If he calls and explains later, great, but outside of that . . . try to channel that Aries fire else wh
|Hey CB, |
I am posting this info. from a book that I have. I am not sure if this will shed light for you - just thought in some small way it may help. I hope it does as all any of us desire is - Peace of mind.
"Withthin every relationship, there are moments of non-relationship. Smart couples use these moments to take time alone to reconnect with self and to recharge. They don't end their relationship when the energy gets low. They don't have an affair. They give each other room to breathe. It might be for an hour or two, for a day or two...perhaps even for a month or two. Each person must find ways back into Self and that means disentangling from other. Each person must find time to ask the question "Who am I now?" The answer to this question changes from time to time. That is why we must not forget to ask the question. Relationship is both a journey into intimacy with another and a journey into intimacy with Self. We forget that. We think it's all about other, but that is not true. Indeed, if our journey into another's heart does not take us into your own, then our progress on the path is interrupted. We need time to internalize. We need time to breathe and be alone. It is part of the cycle. We move together and apart. If we do not move apart, we cannot come back together. You can't have a relationship with all highs and no lows. You can't have a relationship that is all together. Every relationship must fall apart, not just once but many times. That is how it grows, That is how new intimacy is achieved.
Our models of relationship don't allow for his kind of interpersonal transformation within the context of a committed relationship. In our models, people either stay together in a frozen state, or they remain distant and uncommitted. People who stay together "no matter what" stop growing. They cannot even look at each other any more. Life energy leaves the relationship. It cannot abide the limiting patterns and structures.
People who fear intimacy take a rocketship out of the relationship at the first sign of trouble. They move from lover to lover, never breaking through to the source of love, in themselves or in the other person. Some relationships have no staying power. Others have no transforming power. Real relationships require both."
Taken from DANCING WITH THE BELOVED by Paul Ferrini
|Thanks for sharing that Freebird. Very profound, and oh so true. I think we all need to remember that there is no definition for how a relationship 'should' be. All relationships bring us something and it is up to us to find the good them.|
I can relate to the state that you are in as i have myself gone through this phase and thought why does he want it all over again.The push and pull is too difficult to handle.... I still have sleepless nights thinking about it... I think we all pay for whatever harm we do onto others... The fact that he is trying to reconnect only goes to show that he know he has done something wrong... Let it go
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