virgo men and distance/space/disappearing
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Real virgos I know can't forget their real love that easily (there are some weird virgos as well that keep on marrying again and again and keep on talking about their "loves" but they are a few..and not that hard core virgos)
It takes a while for them to love and forget some one, but if you handle him very patiently and maintain that delicate balance, it shall work after a long time.
Be positive and think positive.
|"Here's what I'm struggling with at the moment. I'm dating a Virgo. We've been growing closer and closer and on Monday had an incredibly intimate, profoundly emotional sexual encounter. I haven't heard from him since."|
Was this a "planned" happening? Or was the encounter more of a spontaneous event? Us V-men prefer lovemaking to be scheduled and pre-approved. Has more to do with our sense of wholesomeness and scheduling, rather then getting caught up and letting go in the rapture of the moment. Perhaps you embarrassed your chaste Virgo, V-Lady?
|Oh goodness, I didn't even think of the pre-approved aspect. It was about as planned as you can get without actually pulling out a calendar. On Saturday night, we had a super racy internet chat. On Sunday, we had a super racy internet chat, each went to bed at midnight, then both ended up online two hours later unable to sleep because we couldn't stop thinking of having sex with each other. On Monday, he was able to get away for an hour to come and see me. That seems to be the schedule we're regularly on. Needless to say, I am feeling a bit like a just like me (but I'm also getting a perverse satisfaction out of that element of possession).|
He's a father to a two year old child. He's a surgeon. He teaches and does research. Every part of his life is planned down to the minute. There really isn't a lot of room for spontaneity.
And as an update... I just had an online conversation with him. Apparently, he's been really busy with work for the past couple of days. Interesting bit was that we only talked about Monday night's sex once. I was talking about something going on at work and, as we were changing topics to something equally unspectacular, he interjected to ask whether or not I liked the sex on Monday. I said I did, he affirmed that he enjoyed it as well, and then we moved on to more banalities. Nice conversation, but nothing that makes immediate sense to me in terms of what's going on in my head. I'll need to sleep on this.
|Ahhhh!.....he's a scholarly, educated Virgo, is he? Arent all of us V's? |
More than likely he was breathlessly awaiting that moment in the online conversation to blurt out his fear of rejection, by affirming if he was able to please you? That is, after all, our primary purpose in this world. Giving of ourselves to others.
what is the age difference? Is it too much?
If so, you may need to process slowly , in particular in physical areas.
|New day, new set of neuroses.|
Thank you so much, tollbooth, for that perspective. When he only mentioned Monday night that once and only to see how he performed sexually, I thought he was telling me that the whole experience was irrelevant (or at least had significantly less impact on him than it did on me). It never occurred to me to think that he was actually quasi-nervous about his performance. I do have to say, though, that I am sorry he didn't say anything about his own feelings. I should have asked.
Capgirl, I'm 33. He's 36. I don't hold chastity as being particularly sacred and with the right person I'm ridiculously "easy". There's nothing left to blush over when it comes to the physical stuff. It's the emotional aspects where we both move very, very cautiously.
|It's the emotional aspects where we both move very, very cautiously.|
You got that right! I agree with this, emotional stuff is the one we need to be more cautious about..
|***I'm also telling myself to remain non-emotional. In that sense, I've decided that I'll be warm and receptive when he does get back in touch. Then I'll wait a bit and explain to him what I'm thinking in terms of my needs.|
And I'm sure every water sign reading this is thinking "wtf"! Whatever***
Uhhh, me being a water sign, think this is an excellent choice. I don't believe in smothering. You know he cares for you. Give him his space, it sounds like he will be back when he is able to handle this.
My chi-town girls was up!!! V-lady and Starfish!!!
|treetrunk it's cold. You rock on starfish for not letting it get you down.|
|QS... How's everything going with your virgo? It would blow my mind if yours and mine were in sync.|
|Lol wow what a complicated topic. Now I am not much of a love sick girl over Virgo's myself but I have been confused by them before.|
One of my good girlfriends was by last weekend and she was telling me about her Virgo X and her getting back together for a hook up (We'v told her time and time again to not see him) its not that he isn't a good person because he is. I've had the chance to meet him and I thought he was charming and very polite.
To the point. I have never seen it 1st hand but I've heard of it from her that he keeps leading her on. Like he'll tell her he doesn't want a relationship and she'll say fine and back away and then he'll come back and pretty much seduce her back to bed and then leave and not speak to her weeks on end and then come back again or like the Lady up above mention, naughty chat lol. Like he'll seek her out online and naughty chat with her.
I just don't get that whole cat and mouse game. Were all pretty sick of hearing about him but I don't want to walk away from her just yet. I know she needs some guidance and you all are bringing up some very interesting subjects.
Things that I am stuck on...so he's ignoring her and its painfuly obvious to US that he is. So is this backing away...a small play on his affection for her or is it exactly what I think it is (cowardly scurrying for the nearest exit)?
To be honest I don't get Virgo men and maybe it's best lol I let her make her own mistakes instead of toiling or giving advice because there are few things that I know nothin about and Virgo men are one of them.
|Oh ya while I'm at it she told us some juicy detail about her "personal time" with him. All four of us are very close so secrets are safe in our circle. |
So to the point she was telling us "Have you ever had a man just come out and ask you RIGHT after sex if it was good"? and I replied "Not right afterwards but later on throughout the session yes" so she says "Well Virgo whom I thought was always confident asked me right after sex" and she goes on "Like right when we both layed down after we were done...he comes out and says 'how was that...was that good for you?'"
That can't be a Virgo male insecurity like I read above because I honestly believe that it's an entire MALE insecurity...the need to ask, to seek out etc even though the woman clearly had hers and he had his and it felt good and she moaned.
I still think it's silly when my CAP asks me if it was "good" lol inside I laugh because Im thinking (Ummm I clearly got off, I clearly made noise, I was clearly all over you, I clearly had fun).
Anyhow I am babbling ttyl
|Things are jumping to mind that I completely ignored earlier thanks to DD.|
My virgo is really, really curious about whether or not I enjoyed myself. I think all men care (unfortunately to varying degrees), but my virgo is really, really insistent on receiving that validation. It's only occurring to me now that his interest really is about feeling wanted to a degree that I haven't seen in other signs before.
They're definitely complex.
|Well, every person I've ever slept with (sober) .. we knew.|
In my opinion .. if a person can't tell by how their lovemaking was making each other "feel" and it has to be told, then somebody isn't paying attention, in which case .. if they aren't paying attention .. then the lay was crappola. ;P
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