Aerazo
@Aerazo
8 Years1,000+ PostsAquarius
Comments: 9 · Posts: 2257 · Topics: 92
Let's be honest..
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Yes, because I was too much of a wimp to tell him its over we have no future and not to contact me anymore. I also wasn't strong enough to see it through-so I acted out in a way he would end it and not WANT to see me anymore, even that only lasted so long right enough. Younger days. Learned from that.
I would never intentionally sabotage my relationship
I think the worst thing I do in relationships is I gloss over problems, if my boyfriend does something I don't like I don't really acknowledge it
I think the worst thing I do in relationships is I gloss over problems, if my boyfriend does something I don't like I don't really acknowledge it
I didn't send any text messages for 2 weeks.
Probably screwed myself over right away since the recipient never responded afterwards.
Probably screwed myself over right away since the recipient never responded afterwards.
Posted by TheGreatSearcherDefinitely an Aqua move :/
I didn't send any text messages for 2 weeks.
Probably screwed myself over right away since the recipient never responded afterwards.
Did you do it to purposely disrupt the relationship ?
Posted by cheekyfaerieYes, it's hard for me to end things too.
Insecurity's a sonofabitch. I've tried to scare them off with my crazy. "See? You really aren't good enough. It woulda failed anyway." Aka: self loathing mode
I've also starved people out so they'd break up with me and I didn't have to do the dirty work. If it turned into relationship chicken, I could point out those flaws as an exit strategy. "See. I'm not good enough. It's just gonna fail and I'm going to hurt you in the process." Aka: I'm sick of you and have horrible social skills
Thank goodness I've gotten better at this stuff. 😄
Mostly if I like the person but I know it wouldn't be good long term.
Posted by lovecraftianThe one who cares won't be turned off. 🙂
If it's someone I'm paranoid about losing I've shut down communication thinking girls aren't supposed to chase. But after so long in a relationship it's ok to strike up a conversation, chill out and open up a little bit without worrying about turning them off. They probably get more turned off by the avoidance.
I understand completely is hard to open up again after other failures.
I don't try to but I can be a bit ridged as a Capricorn... I try to go with the flow and play it cool but sometimes my Pisces irritates me with his ways. He's very sweet and we have a lot of fun and things in common but he gets moody sometimes and that's when we clash. I think I sometimes care too much or get too sensitive and push people away or seem too cold when I'm just in need of some love. It's hard to feel understood sometimes.
Self sabotage with a shit ton of overthinking.. insecurites are a bitch. Tied with this weird upbrining of guys chase, girls don't. so i don't reach out to guys i'm interested in.
Absolutely
I have said some cruel shiz that I SHOULD have been dumped for. It's ugly and I'm not proud of it. I do it because I have this internal frustration that he won't be able to handle me or that he'll tire of me, so I sometimes do all I can to hurry the process and see if I'm right.
I have said some cruel shiz that I SHOULD have been dumped for. It's ugly and I'm not proud of it. I do it because I have this internal frustration that he won't be able to handle me or that he'll tire of me, so I sometimes do all I can to hurry the process and see if I'm right.
Posted by AjnaI realized this at the beginning that people would generally walk away when you open up to them. But then I had people walk away because I was NOT expressing my emotions and that hurts even more.
revealing my feelings to them.
Posted by LillyPetalI've been put in that position where he drove me to the point of choosing whether I want to be there or not despite the "crazyness" and I chose not to. Not because I couldn't handle it, but because he feels the need to test me when I have been there anyway. Insecurity drains the emotions in a relationship. It makes it exhausting. I ignored it at the beginning and focused on the good moments but the more I ignored, the harder he pushed.
Absolutely
I have said some cruel shiz that I SHOULD have been dumped for. It's ugly and I'm not proud of it. I do it because I have this internal frustration that he won't be able to handle me or that he'll tire of me, so I sometimes do all I can to hurry the process and see if I'm right.
Reason I ignored was because I don't think I need to pass a test to reassure someone I want to be with them.
Posted by WhatthehellSometimes I think the sabotage isn't because they don't want to be with the person, is because they are afraid to get attached, therefore hurt.
Reading this and realizing how naive I am about how honest people are. Also realizing how brave and stupid I am.
Geez Louise, y'all!
Posted by AerazoI do this. It's a personal choice, and I think I have come to the conclusion that I sabotage myself because after I was in love once, dating people just hasn't felt the same. I haven't found that same connection with anyone else as I once had, but I feel like something similar is out there somewhere.
Do we sometimes sabotage our own relationships?
What are things you have done and why?
For everyone
I'm just learning by trial and error, I guess. I don't mind it being that way at all because I feel in my element, experiencing new people and trying new things.
Posted by DickButtJust went through that. Let someone go who I have been thinking would hold me back if he knew what my real vision is of who I want to become.
Yes, and it's because i knew i wasn't ready. I also have a vision in my head of who i wanna be before i "release myself on the market" again. So yeah, not gonna do that again and waste someone elses time.
Posted by level7wizardThere's nothing wrong with trying to find the one. The complicated part is to hurt other people and sometimes I prefer to be the hurt one bc I know I can deal with it.Posted by AerazoI do this. It's a personal choice, and I think I have come to the conclusion that I sabotage myself because after I was in love once, dating people just hasn't felt the same. I haven't found that same connection with anyone else as I once had, but I feel like something similar is out there somewhere.
Do we sometimes sabotage our own relationships?
What are things you have done and why?
For everyone
I'm just learning by trial and error, I guess.
click to expand
Posted by DickButtNothing wrong with that, is YOUR LIFE anyway. 🙂Posted by AerazoFor it me it wasn't that she was holding me back, but that i was getting comfortable in what i didn't wanna be. And like also i always like exhausting potential so i wanna see what i can max out at in life in general. Sounds so fuckin douchey i know. I was born this way.Posted by DickButtJust went through that. Let someone go who I have been thinking would hold me back if he knew what my real vision is of who I want to become.
Yes, and it's because i knew i wasn't ready. I also have a vision in my head of who i wanna be before i "release myself on the market" again. So yeah, not gonna do that again and waste someone elses time.click to expand
Being comfortable isn't good, at least not for me. I don't like staying in the comfort zone, so I see where you're coming from. I ended a 12 yr relationship and that was part of the issue. he wanted to stay in the comfort zone while I had bigger dreams.
This is the problem when you start relationships too early. you get attached and comfortable with the person making a life suitable and comfortable for the 2 people. But you forget what you wanted to do about your own journey.
Yes. Over stupid shit too
Posted by WhatthehellI think the sabotage is easier for the signs who are emotional but still have the logic and can rationalize about their feelings with what they want but are too afraid to hurt other people.Posted by AerazoOh, I get it. I have abandonment/attachment issues myself. I just still run head-long into it like an idiot when I fall for someone. I don't know whether to be impressed or appalled that some of y'all can control yourselves and sabotage like this. 😆Posted by WhatthehellSometimes I think the sabotage isn't because they don't want to be with the person, is because they are afraid to get attached, therefore hurt.
Reading this and realizing how naive I am about how honest people are. Also realizing how brave and stupid I am.
Geez Louise, y'all!
click to expand
(Me)
Posted by Whatthehell? I can't control and the sabotage is 100% not something j do intentionally. What do you mean?Posted by AerazoOh, I get it. I have abandonment/attachment issues myself. I just still run head-long into it like an idiot when I fall for someone. I don't know whether to be impressed or appalled that some of y'all can control yourselves and sabotage like this. 😆Posted by WhatthehellSometimes I think the sabotage isn't because they don't want to be with the person, is because they are afraid to get attached, therefore hurt.
Reading this and realizing how naive I am about how honest people are. Also realizing how brave and stupid I am.
Geez Louise, y'all!
click to expand
Posted by AerazoOh, it's definitely rooted in insecurity (as well as anger for me), and I'm not proud of it. There is definitely nothing fair or sensible about that behavior.Posted by LillyPetalI've been put in that position where he drove me to the point of choosing whether I want to be there or not despite the "crazyness" and I chose not to. Not because I couldn't handle it, but because he feels the need to test me when I have been there anyway. Insecurity drains the emotions in a relationship. It makes it exhausting. I ignored it at the beginning and focused on the good moments but the more I ignored, the harder he pushed.
Absolutely
I have said some cruel shiz that I SHOULD have been dumped for. It's ugly and I'm not proud of it. I do it because I have this internal frustration that he won't be able to handle me or that he'll tire of me, so I sometimes do all I can to hurry the process and see if I'm right.
Reason I ignored was because I don't think I need to pass a test to reassure someone I want to be with them.click to expand
Posted by DickButtPosted by AerazoFor it me it wasn't that she was holding me back, but that i was getting comfortable in what i didn't wanna be. And like also i always like exhausting potential so i wanna see what i can max out at in life in general. Sounds so fuckin douchey i know. I was born this way.Posted by DickButtJust went through that. Let someone go who I have been thinking would hold me back if he knew what my real vision is of who I want to become.
Yes, and it's because i knew i wasn't ready. I also have a vision in my head of who i wanna be before i "release myself on the market" again. So yeah, not gonna do that again and waste someone elses time.click to expand
You and every other Taurus ?
Sometimes it's ok to free yourself of all priorities... and just indulge in pure bliss of distraction tbh
Posted by AerazoNo, I didn't intend to do that, but I'll admit that chatting with her gave me an anxiety attack every time I said something.Posted by TheGreatSearcherDefinitely an Aqua move :/
I didn't send any text messages for 2 weeks.
Probably screwed myself over right away since the recipient never responded afterwards.
Did you do it to purposely disrupt the relationship ?click to expand
However, my biggest mistake was texting her around a month later (and obviously receiving no response).
Posted by WhatthehellI don't intentionally sabotage nor do I have any desire to do it ,. I doubt anyone really ever does? Maybe they do but I for sure do not.Posted by justagirlMy bad. I made an assumption. It looks like control to me. I have Aqua rising, but I can't control my feelings for someone. I run toward what I want and away from what I don't want, generally.Posted by Whatthehell? I can't control and the sabotage is 100% not something j do intentionally. What do you mean?Posted by AerazoOh, I get it. I have abandonment/attachment issues myself. I just still run head-long into it like an idiot when I fall for someone. I don't know whether to be impressed or appalled that some of y'all can control yourselves and sabotage like this. 😆Posted by WhatthehellSometimes I think the sabotage isn't because they don't want to be with the person, is because they are afraid to get attached, therefore hurt.
Reading this and realizing how naive I am about how honest people are. Also realizing how brave and stupid I am.
Geez Louise, y'all!
It's the desire to sabotage what you're saying you can't control?click to expand
I guess it's a bit like this song... 🙂
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
i did several things but the 2 most funniest out of all re
the dare to try game basically she asked me to let her have 3some with her friend imwhich i am on agreement with it but later on she failed to let me have my enjoyment by disagreeing to do 3some with 2 of my brother's german shepherd. screw me to follow old mantras "ladies first".
the last one with the longest date i ever had (10 mths) re
asking her permisiion to marry her sister and being my second wifes (spoiled brat unable to take jokes lightheartedly).
the dare to try game basically she asked me to let her have 3some with her friend imwhich i am on agreement with it but later on she failed to let me have my enjoyment by disagreeing to do 3some with 2 of my brother's german shepherd. screw me to follow old mantras "ladies first".
the last one with the longest date i ever had (10 mths) re
asking her permisiion to marry her sister and being my second wifes (spoiled brat unable to take jokes lightheartedly).
I use sex as weapon. I try to nip it in the bum before it comes to that though :/
Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences. Also, the sacrifice that can be involved with such relationships, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
click to expand
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
click to expand
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Posted by AerazoAll of those 'being afraid to get hurt' are subotaging and I see like 90% of members do that!
Do we sometimes sabotage our own relationships?
What are things you have done and why?
For everyone
Like they want to masturbate their whole life!
Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
click to expand
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
Posted by CopperDoveNow that you are talking about coincidences, it happened to me with this last guy I was seeing. He was the 4th cap I meet I have a connection with, he asked me if I was an Aquarius the day we met and even before that I could feel our connection. It ended up being that a guy that I know is his friend for many years and he introduced us that night. There were other nights that one of us would go but never got to meet.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
click to expand
He had 2 other Aqua girlfriends.
We got along great but something felt like too good to be true and I think we both started to sabotage until now.
He ended up to be living close to my daughter's school which is not in my district and we crossed paths many times before on the commute.
Got trips planned separately for the same place. and other things that were coincidence.
My fear of commitment or fear of being made a fool of keeps me dragging my feet when it comes to relationships.
Or I'll get too close, get fearful of being vulnerable, shut completely down, and won't say a word. Flaked on dates (scaredy cat me) with good dudes too, stood someone up (he was an asshole tho?), not returned calls (conversation was a snooze fest) but I never told them I was no longer interested. Just avoided until they stopped calling.
I'll get over myself one day. Until then, ill enjoy my chocolate donuts. ?
Or I'll get too close, get fearful of being vulnerable, shut completely down, and won't say a word. Flaked on dates (scaredy cat me) with good dudes too, stood someone up (he was an asshole tho?), not returned calls (conversation was a snooze fest) but I never told them I was no longer interested. Just avoided until they stopped calling.
I'll get over myself one day. Until then, ill enjoy my chocolate donuts. ?
Posted by DistilledYes, I'm glad that I could move on. It was painful but it didn't jade me thankfully.Posted by CopperDoveI don't run into old flames really either.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
Really fuck it though.
We also have Scorpio south node. His Venus was the link actually.
At least you tried and were aware and didn't hold on. Being realistic causes less pain for everyone.
I myself am traditional but not conventional. So people see the non conventional first. Although it's confusing because I go about it in a conservative manner. For instance I may go on a crazy trip alone and people are like how can a girl do that by herself in a place like that. But when I'm there I keep my cool, while others around me don't.
I learned/learning that I like my freedom and liberty above all. I've experienced so much with it and I don't want to stop for anyone... They can join me, although. I hate being restricted and confined. I thought I could do it because I have in the past and even then it did not work out.
Seems like you're self aware.
click to expand
I can say similarly about myself with being unconventional yet traditional at the same time. 🙂 I think most people assume I'm more conservative than I am, at first, for a number of reasons (I can be methodical with how I approach things, for example).
100% relate to liking freedom and not wanting to be confined. I'm loyal and like to be helpful to people, and I always do my best to keep my word, So I'm reliable, but I don't want to be controlled or to control others. I put my powers of control into myself (internal drill sargeant).
You seem self aware too. 🙂
Unfortunately, yes.
I tend to sabotage my romantic relationships when I start to feel paranoid/insecure or when I feel like the person starts to get distant. The stress of a relationship causes me to push people away. It causes me to isolate myself in order to avoid the pain that I think I'm about to endure. I realize I have an issue with this, and I'm trying to work on myself. Right now, my bf has been a little distant. And all I keep thinking of is how I just wanna leave because I'm making assumptions that he's not into me anymore or he's cheating etc. I just wanna avoid the situation of being hurt. BUT I'm trying to shut out the feeling of wanting to run away. I need to learn patience.
I tend to sabotage my romantic relationships when I start to feel paranoid/insecure or when I feel like the person starts to get distant. The stress of a relationship causes me to push people away. It causes me to isolate myself in order to avoid the pain that I think I'm about to endure. I realize I have an issue with this, and I'm trying to work on myself. Right now, my bf has been a little distant. And all I keep thinking of is how I just wanna leave because I'm making assumptions that he's not into me anymore or he's cheating etc. I just wanna avoid the situation of being hurt. BUT I'm trying to shut out the feeling of wanting to run away. I need to learn patience.
Posted by bumboklattI think that I'm kind of screwed in this case since I know her irl and I'll probably meet her during summer.Posted by TheGreatSearcherHahaha
I didn't send any text messages for 2 weeks.
Probably screwed myself over right away since the recipient never responded afterwards.
I've done this many timesclick to expand
Posted by DistilledGreat that you relate. 🙂 I never seem to get jaded either. I can be cautious, but that's different of course. I was cautious about certain things even when I was a young kid.Posted by CopperDoveI agree with you're last bit to a T.Posted by DistilledYes, I'm glad that I could move on. It was painful but it didn't jade me thankfully.Posted by CopperDoveI don't run into old flames really either.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
Really fuck it though.
We also have Scorpio south node. His Venus was the link actually.
At least you tried and were aware and didn't hold on. Being realistic causes less pain for everyone.
I myself am traditional but not conventional. So people see the non conventional first. Although it's confusing because I go about it in a conservative manner. For instance I may go on a crazy trip alone and people are like how can a girl do that by herself in a place like that. But when I'm there I keep my cool, while others around me don't.
I learned/learning that I like my freedom and liberty above all. I've experienced so much with it and I don't want to stop for anyone... They can join me, although. I hate being restricted and confined. I thought I could do it because I have in the past and even then it did not work out.
Seems like you're self aware.
I can say similarly about myself with being unconventional yet traditional at the same time. 🙂 I think most people assume I'm more conservative than I am, at first, for a number of reasons (I can be methodical with how I approach things, for example).
100% relate to liking freedom and not wanting to be confined. I'm loyal and like to be helpful to people, and I always do my best to keep my word, So I'm reliable, but I don't want to be controlled or to control others. I put my powers of control into myself (internal drill sargeant).
You seem self aware too. 🙂
And I love the jaded part- nothing in my life has jaded me thus far. I am slowly but shurly looking forward to the rest of my Saturn return age years and beyond.
And thank you. 🙂
I was in class a few years ago with a sun and scorp Venus female and I'll never forget her. Other than my teachers she was the only one who offered her time and personal resources for me to get back on my feet as I held my situation in for a month and no one would have blamed me for giving up that time. She also picked me as her partner every time for some reason (health field)- she looked at me and it was a done deal. People called me and her the euro and Canadian versions of each other... Lol! She was very quiet but when she spoke it was never bullshit and was very articulate. I admired her. Think most women envied her and guys wanted her.
🙂
click to expand
I just realized something I didn't think to mention before, but I'm reminded because you mentioned your Saturn return time again: the relationship I had with the person who sabotaged was during my Saturn return time!
Your Scorp sun and Venus friend sounds like a very cool person. I like what people said about you guys. It's always strange to me when people talk about Scorp sun and Venus being awful. Horrible examples exist, of course, but it's been rare for me to encounter them in real life.
Posted by AerazoDefinitely it can be intriguing when there are unusual coincidences. I've noticed it, to one degree or another, in my most significant relationships, both good and bad. My hardest relationship ever had the weirdest ones.Posted by CopperDoveNow that you are talking about coincidences, it happened to me with this last guy I was seeing. He was the 4th cap I meet I have a connection with, he asked me if I was an Aquarius the day we met and even before that I could feel our connection. It ended up being that a guy that I know is his friend for many years and he introduced us that night. There were other nights that one of us would go but never got to meet.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
He had 2 other Aqua girlfriends.
We got along great but something felt like too good to be true and I think we both started to sabotage until now.
He ended up to be living close to my daughter's school which is not in my district and we crossed paths many times before on the commute.
Got trips planned separately for the same place. and other things that were coincidence.
click to expand
Posted by WhatthehellJust my natural way of dealing. I make it clear when I'm involved with someone that sex is a serious component to our relationship. I have a very high libido and know that I won't be happy unless I have a very active sex life.Posted by AquaviperWhy do you do that?
I use sex as weapon. I try to nip it in the bum before it comes to that though :/click to expand
Posted by AquaviperThats just like me!! One day he says "let's not have sex today and cuddle ☺?" I say "okay?" .... 15min later ... I can't hold back and I turn him on so he can't hold back either. But I don't see anything wrong with doing it.. even if we are upset at each other, we can still do it ?and have done it ) ? hahaPosted by WhatthehellJust my natural way of dealing. I make it clear when I'm involved with someone that sex is a serious component to our relationship. I have a very high libido and know that I won't be happy unless I have a very active sex life.Posted by AquaviperWhy do you do that?
I use sex as weapon. I try to nip it in the bum before it comes to that though :/click to expand
Edit: His issue was that He wasn't very open to experiment. A sort of laid back, but it encouraged me to try more as he started liking more things ?
Posted by Areyoumytwinflame
My Aqua doesn't do it anymore but before we were official he was a nightmare with it.
He would "warn" me of things so I could back out before he was too attached.
"I'm a hairy guy"
Ok? Well you're a man so I don't expect you to be smooth like a woman
So ridiculously silly
Hahaha , too funny !
Is it wired that I can relate to all of this and I have Aqua moon? I have abandonment issues though, pushed millions of people away, though recently have my Aqua with lots of Pisces placements to slowly showing me that being vulnerable is ok.... I have too much Aqua in me to not get that vulnerable is ok.. god I am learning so much from this guy.... I also have crazy high standards.... why is that so
Posted by AerazoPosted by AquaviperThats just like me!! One day he says "let's not have sex today and cuddle ☺?" I say "okay?" .... 15min later ... I can't hold back and I turn him on so he can't hold back either. But I don't see anything wrong with doing it.. even if we are upset at each other, we can still do it ?and have done it ) ? hahaPosted by WhatthehellJust my natural way of dealing. I make it clear when I'm involved with someone that sex is a serious component to our relationship. I have a very high libido and know that I won't be happy unless I have a very active sex life.Posted by AquaviperWhy do you do that?
I use sex as weapon. I try to nip it in the bum before it comes to that though :/
Edit: His issue was that He wasn't very open to experiment. A sort of laid back, but it encouraged me to try more as he started liking more things ?
click to expand
Me me me, I think I use sex as a way to show that person I love them .. too much Aqua in me(masculine energy )
Posted by AerazoGo forPosted by CopperDoveNow that you are talking about coincidences, it happened to me with this last guy I was seeing. He was the 4th cap I meet I have a connection with, he asked me if I was an Aquarius the day we met and even before that I could feel our connection. It ended up being that a guy that I know is his friend for many years and he introduced us that night. There were other nights that one of us would go but never got to meet.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
He had 2 other Aqua girlfriends.
We got along great but something felt like too good to be true and I think we both started to sabotage until now.
He ended up to be living close to my daughter's school which is not in my district and we crossed paths many times before on the commute.
Got trips planned separately for the same place. and other things that were coincidence.
click to expand
It, you only love once!!
Posted by saweetz1988Haha I do too!!! and I'm Fire Dominant lolPosted by AerazoPosted by AquaviperThats just like me!! One day he says "let's not have sex today and cuddle ☺?" I say "okay?" .... 15min later ... I can't hold back and I turn him on so he can't hold back either. But I don't see anything wrong with doing it.. even if we are upset at each other, we can still do it ?and have done it ) ? hahaPosted by WhatthehellJust my natural way of dealing. I make it clear when I'm involved with someone that sex is a serious component to our relationship. I have a very high libido and know that I won't be happy unless I have a very active sex life.Posted by AquaviperWhy do you do that?
I use sex as weapon. I try to nip it in the bum before it comes to that though :/
Edit: His issue was that He wasn't very open to experiment. A sort of laid back, but it encouraged me to try more as he started liking more things ?
Me me me, I think I use sex as a way to show that person I love them .. too much Aqua in me(masculine energy )click to expand
Sometimes I confuse it with lust but if I laugh when I'm with them I know it's more than sex. haha if I can stand being around him for a long time and he holding my hand then I know it's love ??
Posted by saweetz1988Not worth my time anymore.Posted by AerazoGo forPosted by CopperDoveNow that you are talking about coincidences, it happened to me with this last guy I was seeing. He was the 4th cap I meet I have a connection with, he asked me if I was an Aquarius the day we met and even before that I could feel our connection. It ended up being that a guy that I know is his friend for many years and he introduced us that night. There were other nights that one of us would go but never got to meet.Posted by DistilledIt can sometimes surprise me with the opposite -- never or rarely running into people I know even when we live in the same area. So, as logical as it is that people in the same area might cross paths, it isn't as simple as that I know. I understand why you might wonder and be wearily amused.Posted by CopperDoveFor me the sabotage and fate one was the same. So I laugh, but wearily because I wonder if the universe is playing a trick. I still don't know and it doesn't help seeing him... Hard to when you're exercising driving, or going to work (eerily all in the same area for me- just the way my life is at the moment, have to stay like this for a bit more time.. :/) and see them driving by with as mentioned a different women every so often in their car. Never saw them before around there but then again didn't look or whatev. I ultimately slammed the door but he closed it forever it seems.Posted by DistilledWow, that's really strange and funny that you see him around so much. Hopefully the lessons will become clear over time.Posted by CopperDoveI'm still learning the lessons and trying to figure them out. Keep seeing the person everywhere with different women. Lol. Never saw an ex so much in my life! So weird. At least that's one I learned is his true character and I was right about that one.Posted by DistilledThat's very interesting --- thanks for describing that! The fated quality you describe, I can relate to, not so much with the relationship I mentioned with sabotage, but with my last relationship -- the unusual things that happen that are extraordinary with synchronicities even though there are things that can't work too, either because of where the people are at the time, or fundamental differences that don't change, and the sacrifice that can be involved, but hopefully ultimately something is learned that is very helpful as a lesson.Posted by CopperDoveSorry it happened and can't say if you personally need it, but it does bring closure to some.
Someone I dated, long after our relationship ended, told me that he had sabotaged things with me because of his fear of betrayal. He had been cheated on in a previous relationship. He sabotaged our relationship with neglect. At the time he wasn't fully conscious of it, he explained.
When we were involved, I thought that he might be sabotaging things. I was over him by the time he revealed what had happened, but it was helpful to hear him describe the motivation behind his behaviour so I knew that my sense of things back then was correct.
I've done this with someone I shouldn't have been with in the 1st place with gut feeling. I knew it couldn't be from the beginning and then he knew towards the end.
We were both looking for something in eachother. We found it but got scared. I couldn't open up because I didn't trust him. He couldn't let go of his need to control and I would have been another prisoner in his dark world. He didn't believe someone could be decent and set me up and tested me. I didn't call him out on it and therefore played my part by clamming up.
Both of us mirrored each other in the end.
Also our lives were different worlds. I regret saying yes as it killed a part of me because I let some boundaries go to prove myself right instead of just walking away. But it also woke me up. The situation literally was fate either way, even if had been avoided. Coincidences and synchronism happened to both of us at the same time- never experienced something like that and I don't believe he had either. It was like a movie.
He was like a teacher for me I guess.
What is your moon, btw? Sorry you've probably posted it before and I'm forgetting.
Moon in Pisces as well in 8th. Conjunct my sun and house which you know.
Thank you too.
The sync stuff- did it feel like fate? Like literally out of your control?
Like I said I've never had it happen and I tend to be a rational person...
Thanks for your chart info! I was thinking it would be interesting if your chart had any resemblance to the man I mentioned (the saboteur, not the fated). He's a Pisces with Aries moon. His sun is in the 7th house, moon in 8th, so close in a way. 🙂
Yes, it did feel like fate with the other man. Out of my control in some ways, and some spooky things happened that we couldn't explain rationally. I learned a lot of things in the relationship, and even though it was destructive, ultimately, there were some positives that were unusual and probably will help me for the rest of my life.
Person I mean has same Venus as you but in 9th and also Aries moon in 10th, Mars was in 8th.
It was some what recent. Also started during my Saturn return, his started the year before that. All the ironies. One on top of the other.
What were the positives in your lessons?
I can imagine Venus in 9th would lend a free spirit energy to Scorp Venus. I can see Mars in 8th potentially having a link with your sun and moon in 8th in synastry. Aries moon in 10th strikes me as quite ambitious and maybe controls impulses a bit, but possibly it could be ruthless too.
Some of the positives I learned are that certain things about conventional relationships don't work for me at all (he wasn't conventional), and also we both wanted to live the same kind of life style and we worked together to figure out where we could move to do that -- we traveled to several different places and lived in some of them together to test them out.
He had 2 other Aqua girlfriends.
We got along great but something felt like too good to be true and I think we both started to sabotage until now.
He ended up to be living close to my daughter's school which is not in my district and we crossed paths many times before on the commute.
Got trips planned separately for the same place. and other things that were coincidence.
It, you only love once!!click to expand
@Distilled
I had forgotten about the cutoff with word limit for posts. I should have responded w/o quoting, like I am now. 🙂
I had forgotten about the cutoff with word limit for posts. I should have responded w/o quoting, like I am now. 🙂
Posted by DistilledGood that Saturn return didn't break you -- it seems that as long a a person is responsible and doesn't go against the lesson of Saturn, they make it out okay.Posted by CopperDoveOk... Glad I mentioned (now I know.. Thanks!).
@Distilled
I had forgotten about the cutoff with word limit for posts. I should have responded w/o quoting, like I am now. 🙂
I'm cautious too. Nothing wrong with that. Guess being cautious prevents being unaware and therefore provides more clarity and more options. So when decent people get hurt because they are unaware- if they don't wake up... They can become bitter. :/
But I'm hard on myself when I slip. I like going where no one goes but people sometimes can't handle it. That's why when I meet scorps it's like yes! But my own energy is hidden underneath my sunny exterior and that can get confusing. We both want loyalty but someone's gotta give. Mind you maturity and being honest comes into play too.
This whole Saturn return thing pretty much tried to break me, but It's only a flesh wound.
Never been screwed over by a Scorp sun. I do believe the scorp Venus sits more comfortably with the sun also.
I recall we talked about this and I did say there are some bad apples for sure. But really that goes for people. Also the men and women I find different. The women seem to handle the placements better.
🙂
My friends friend (new one in our group) is a Scorpio and she thought I was one... Lol! She's like you have that whole dark and gloomy thing going on about you. I'm like I'm a Pisces. She's like but they whine a lot. Her bf is one... Lol!
🙂click to expand
Yes, people I've known who are jaded and bitter from their relationship experiences often blame anything but themselves for what happened to them, so that's lack of self awareness for sure.
I've usually found people with key things in the 8th, like sun and/or moon, Scorpionic, so I can understand why you might have been mistaken for a Scorpio! I've had close relationships with a few people with strong 8th houses.
lol, I hadn't noticed Pisces whining, at least not frequently enough to identify it as a Pisces trait.
Yes, it does seem like male and female Scorpios have some differences with how they express the energy. And I agree there are bad apples of every sign.
I sabotaged all my relationship with my jealousy. Somehow, whenever I hear a mention of an ex (even for the most trivial reasons), I turn into a beast. I grow horns, and my face turns red, I'm like a bull in Pamplona.
I drove men crazy with it.
Which is quite surprising, because overall, I'm pretty chilled.
Is it intuition gone haywire or the madness of insecurity (ego thing)? I don't know, but it used to exhaust me.
And I didn't get better with time, which is sad.
I know solution to the problem ; concentrate more on yourself, and less on the SO.
Be less empathetic to the hurts people experienced before.
Don't engage feelings in situations where all they do is distort reality.
In theory all is clear; the practice is failing royally.
Such a wasted energy.
I drove men crazy with it.
Which is quite surprising, because overall, I'm pretty chilled.
Is it intuition gone haywire or the madness of insecurity (ego thing)? I don't know, but it used to exhaust me.
And I didn't get better with time, which is sad.
I know solution to the problem ; concentrate more on yourself, and less on the SO.
Be less empathetic to the hurts people experienced before.
Don't engage feelings in situations where all they do is distort reality.
In theory all is clear; the practice is failing royally.
Such a wasted energy.
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