My Cancer ex, I guess he is an ex now, had a huge fight last Saturday. It was something petty. But he called me a really offensive term. I got so offended and I blew up. I was so mad. He tried to apologize but it was not sincere so I was not accepting. I was so frustrated. We have been fighting more than usual the last few months and I said that it's probably ok if we separated. He initially said no. But eventually he got mad and said he agrees with my decision.
The following day he sent me a link to a song via sms. I did not reply. He tried calling me. On the fourth call I answered. He said oh I forgot you left me. Then he reiterated that He agreed with my decision. He told me that no one would marry me, he's sorry for my future husband etc because I have an anger issue. I told him that my anger was a reaction to what he said. And he went off again on what an awful person I was. Then he had to go and he said he'll call me later.
I went home to my mom because I was so hurt. Then later in the day he sent me a picture of his basketball team. I did not reply. Then he tried calling me. I was not able to answer because I fell asleep and my phone was silent.
When I woke up, he unfriended me on fb. I tried calling him and he cancels my calls. He blocked me temporarily. He's still in my insta and snapchat though. Social media is a big deal for us because we are long distance.
I left him alone. But I was missing him so bad i sent him a text on the third day saying hey, i miss you. His reply was you left me and now you miss me???? With a bunch of sarcastic emoticons. I explained to hime that I said what I said because I was very emotional. And that i was sorry for how I handled things. His reply was wow. I told him that he has the capacity to make me very happy and sad because I value the things he say. And when he says something hurtful to me, it hurts a lot and I lash out. He never replied.
After 12 hours I sent him a voicemail telling him that I miss him and I want to fix things. And that I'm sorry for my part of the hurt. And that I hope he feels the same.
He hasn't replied. This is the fourth day that he refused to call me. And I don't want to push anymore because I already feel that I've been pushy.
Anyway. I need to get that off my chest. Any insight will be appreciated.