Report Webpage

  • User Submitted Image
    female
    Joined dxpnet on July 23, 2007.
    "My other relationship- I have been considering ending it and have been for a couple of years-we have grown so apart. I love this guys company- I am not real sure why I am second guessing this. Maybe because I am unsure of my own feelings. "
    Sagittarian ----- Please do not end your 20 year relationship on a whim because this guy makes you feel good and sings to you...Please do as Dreamy-Eyez has suggested and back away to re-evaluate things. Right now I think you are viewing the situation through rose-colored glasses.
    You need to think of this guy as a drug right now, an addiction. In order for you to find out whether your relationship has lost its spark, you need to kick your habit for the time being or good. If at all possible tell this guy that you think it would be best if you evaluate your current situation and ask that there be no contact.

    Since he knows how you feel and what is going on between the two, he shouldn't be selfish and insist on continuing because he too should evaluate his situation as well. Lies/deceit can only go on for so long before someone/everyone finds out and gets hurt.
    It is really time for you to do some soul searching and FIND OUT WHAT YOU REALLY WANT like MIA said. You won't be able to make an objective decision with this other guy still in play because he is a distraction.
    Maybe you could focus on your current relationship for the next 3 months, talk to your spouse about the changes that have taken place and your feelings. Start to do some of the things you and your lover does with your spouse to spice things up (do not be direct/slowly introduce them-you wouldn't want him suspicious). Write a list of the pro/cons of each relationship. You will probably notice that the list with your spouse will be longer, because those are the tangible things that you two have acquired/built over the years.
    Also this other guy has a major relationship that he is not likely to let go (i.e.-wife & children) no matter how unhappy he is with his wife. If he were going to do so because of his unhappiness he would have probably already left. I don't know if you and your spouse have children, but if you don't he has more to lose than you. Many times when parents divorce, especially as a result of cheating (if caught), the children side with the mother.