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    Joined dxpnet on January 16, 2022.
    Posted by Whorpio
    Posted by roti
    Posted by WhorpioActually, in ancient times it was normal for upper class men to have “concubines”, which in todays world is the equivalent of a mistress. Polyamory spans centuries; religious institutions have just brainwashed generations of people to think it’s abnormal.

    In those times, wives didn’t have much of a choice. This was normalised until recently and it wasn’t exclusive to the upper class either.

    I think people should question why it wasn’t re-normalized until recently. And I also believe people should question why they are monogamous, because the way I see it is we are conditioned from birth to only idealize two-person, closed relationships.

    Imagine if we weren’t brainwashing children that way, however; imagine a world where we teach offspring it’s okay to be attracted to several people, that there should be no shame in their desires.

    I do see how it could be hard to teach this, however, since children learn by relating new information to their perceived reality. So if they only have one mommy and daddy (who are still married to each other) it may be absurd to bring in new ideas about having several mommies and daddies lol.

    Idk maybe just don’t teach children at all about romantic relationships until puberty. I don’t know if everyone in the US experienced this, but I know I can remember as early as kindergarten a teacher talking about the special relationship between a mom & a dad (it was in a book she was reading us).
    Sorry this post is all over the place; I get going on one train of thought and then it leads to another.
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    Notification didn’t come through

    I do agree that marriage has always been transactional. Families offer up their daughter to another family in return for a dowry in some cultures. And monogamy isn’t the only way.

    I don’t think anyone is judging you for being in an open relationship but the fact you entertain married men in monogamous relationships.

    As I said, in the past wives had no say in the matter. It was their husbands who were in open relationships not them. If they openly objected, their husbands would beat the shit out of them and her in-laws would scapegoat her as a bad wife and mother for speaking out against her husband to preserve the family’s reputation. The dynamic wasn’t how you made it sound, there was no equality. Men had free reign to do whatever the fuck they wanted without repercussions.

    You and these married men who seek you out are not playing by the same rules as their wives. That’s the issue. You’re not going to claim responsibility because you’re doing what you want, it’s on these married men to act right. But sometimes just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should.

    You could easily have a no married men policy but you stated you’ve benefitted from them in the past or not fuck men who aren’t in open relationships at all.