Posted by bmoon8

Posted by bkbella86

Posted by LadyNeptune
He literally asked to be banned so the people gave him what he wanted.

That sucks

It doesn’t suck because he called another member the n word in a cowardly way in the person’s inbox instead of out in the open.

He then challenged a bunch of us to get him banned for it.

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treetrunk that dude! Got what he deserved.

Posted by Sooner_or_Later

Posted by malloryor
Can we be honest about it too? I know Leos love to pretend like they never get bothered, but let’s be real...I know there’s at least that ONE time someone said something, or did something that really messed with your pride or bruised your ego. So what was it? What did they say?

My ex was a Leo - from what he told me, he hated being betrayed by his friends - people he thought he was close to, only to realize they were using him for certain things. Also not being taken seriously, repeated failures in work or when things didn't go his way. He was also used to having the spotlight all of the time in sports - but when he changed soccer leagues for example, he found that he wasn't accepted on the team as much as the first, and his teammates didn't treat him well. I often used to tell him that they didn't deserve him and that his talent should be put somewhere he was truly appreciated and respected. I knew he was upset about it though, more than he would show.

In all my past experience - Leo men are sensitive, and deep down they care a lot more than they sometimes show about many things. As a Scorp - I think that's why I'm so drawn to them.

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My experiences have also led me to see the same as you. They are quite sensitive and care a lot more than they let on. I very much admire their strength and determination. I'm a Scorp dominant Gemini and also very drawn to the lions.

I feel like they bruise their own ego more so than others do. They have a mad will to accomplish their goals. Others may hurt their ego with harsh words or actions at times, but I don't think anything hurts their pride as much as not accomplishing what they want in life. They are actually really hard on themselves, but you'll never see it, cause they don't want you to. Lots of people can hurt their pride and ego, but none of it is near as significant as the pressure they put on themselves.

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune
If your SO attended and your seeing your SO that's cross contamination and you might as well have gone, worn your mask, etc.
But I get it, these are strange af times. I've been extra careful because my partner is asthmatic and I want to protect him. Even when fully vaccinated you can still get it and pass the virus so its a lose lose situation.
If I'm you I'm reaching out to his dad and letting him know the reason straight from my lips. Set the record straight. And next time brief your guy on what to say. Get your stories aligned.

Yeah, so there is another layer to the story that I left out.

SO and I were arguing the day of the shower because he has been living in my (rented) house for several months and doesn’t want to sign the month to month lease.

I’m sure he realized he couldn’t tell his Dad he’s putting me in a difficult position by living in my house without being on the lease.

What does that have to do with his dads question for why you didn't attend?

I didn’t tell my SO I wasnt going or why. I was going to pretend I got caught up in something work related. But the argument got me side tracked and I looked down at my watch and the shower was in 10 minutes so I just said “I totally forgot about B’s shower”

I really didn’t think my SO would just say I forgot.

So if you tell him you forgot and his dad asks, why wouldn't he not repeat what you told him? I think you aren't really mad about this but in actuality mad about him moving into your place and not signing a lease.
So address that.

I addressed the lease on the day of the shower. I thought I said that. He said he would sign in.

So if you live together what's the real reason you didn't go to the shower? Cause he went and brought back his exposure to covid germies... so its not that

Who said he went? Why do you insist on trying to inject details into my situation that never occurred.

Cause you left a lot of gaps.. I took it that your dude had attended this shower too.

I provided what info I thought relevant to answer my initial question of “Do you expect your SO to lie for you”

If we live together and he went without me...how could I have just forgotten? Then his response to his Dad would have made even less sense.

We just go by what you tell us. It was brief so we are kind of left guessing some things.

Do you think he maybe just said you forgot cause he was still sour about the argument? That seems likely to me, unless he's always like this.. Not having your back.

I get it. I should have just asked the question without any context but I didn’t want people to think I’m asking my spouse to lie about a bank robbery. I just needed him to tell a fib to keep me in his family’s good graces.

He probably was still mad about the argument.

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No worries. I kinda meant the opposite, more details the better. Less chance of us stretching to find information.

And yeah, that's kind of what I took from this. Tell him to stop being such a baby! Lol

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune
If your SO attended and your seeing your SO that's cross contamination and you might as well have gone, worn your mask, etc.
But I get it, these are strange af times. I've been extra careful because my partner is asthmatic and I want to protect him. Even when fully vaccinated you can still get it and pass the virus so its a lose lose situation.
If I'm you I'm reaching out to his dad and letting him know the reason straight from my lips. Set the record straight. And next time brief your guy on what to say. Get your stories aligned.

Yeah, so there is another layer to the story that I left out.

SO and I were arguing the day of the shower because he has been living in my (rented) house for several months and doesn’t want to sign the month to month lease.

I’m sure he realized he couldn’t tell his Dad he’s putting me in a difficult position by living in my house without being on the lease.

What does that have to do with his dads question for why you didn't attend?

I didn’t tell my SO I wasnt going or why. I was going to pretend I got caught up in something work related. But the argument got me side tracked and I looked down at my watch and the shower was in 10 minutes so I just said “I totally forgot about B’s shower”

I really didn’t think my SO would just say I forgot.

So if you tell him you forgot and his dad asks, why wouldn't he not repeat what you told him? I think you aren't really mad about this but in actuality mad about him moving into your place and not signing a lease.
So address that.

I addressed the lease on the day of the shower. I thought I said that. He said he would sign in.

So if you live together what's the real reason you didn't go to the shower? Cause he went and brought back his exposure to covid germies... so its not that

Who said he went? Why do you insist on trying to inject details into my situation that never occurred.

Cause you left a lot of gaps.. I took it that your dude had attended this shower too.

I provided what info I thought relevant to answer my initial question of “Do you expect your SO to lie for you”

If we live together and he went without me...how could I have just forgotten? Then his response to his Dad would have made even less sense.

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We just go by what you tell us. It was brief so we are kind of left guessing some things.

Do you think he maybe just said you forgot cause he was still sour about the argument? That seems likely to me, unless he's always like this.. Not having your back.

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune

Posted by stardustmop

Posted by LadyNeptune
If your SO attended and your seeing your SO that's cross contamination and you might as well have gone, worn your mask, etc.
But I get it, these are strange af times. I've been extra careful because my partner is asthmatic and I want to protect him. Even when fully vaccinated you can still get it and pass the virus so its a lose lose situation.
If I'm you I'm reaching out to his dad and letting him know the reason straight from my lips. Set the record straight. And next time brief your guy on what to say. Get your stories aligned.

Yeah, so there is another layer to the story that I left out.

SO and I were arguing the day of the shower because he has been living in my (rented) house for several months and doesn’t want to sign the month to month lease.

I’m sure he realized he couldn’t tell his Dad he’s putting me in a difficult position by living in my house without being on the lease.

What does that have to do with his dads question for why you didn't attend?

I didn’t tell my SO I wasnt going or why. I was going to pretend I got caught up in something work related. But the argument got me side tracked and I looked down at my watch and the shower was in 10 minutes so I just said “I totally forgot about B’s shower”

I really didn’t think my SO would just say I forgot.

So if you tell him you forgot and his dad asks, why wouldn't he not repeat what you told him? I think you aren't really mad about this but in actuality mad about him moving into your place and not signing a lease.
So address that.

I addressed the lease on the day of the shower. I thought I said that. He said he would sign in.

So if you live together what's the real reason you didn't go to the shower? Cause he went and brought back his exposure to covid germies... so its not that

Who said he went? Why do you insist on trying to inject details into my situation that never occurred.

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Cause you left a lot of gaps.. I took it that your dude had attended this shower too.

Posted by Ripe

Posted by AbbyNormal

Posted by Ripe
Thank you everyone for your inputs. I really needed it a few hours ago.

So, I called her and told her that:

1 - Hiding stuff like cheating on me from me in the past was really wrong of her. I always deserved better.
2 - & That I think that she needs serious help, for her sake & children's sake, but whether she goes after it or not is entirely her prerogative and none of my business. I told her if chooses to get help and if that help requires anything from me, then I don't mind supporting it, otherwise, I do not want her in my life in any social capacity.

She was very apologetic and kept saying that she *was* treetrunked up by her upbringing and kept apologizing some more. Told her that I forgave her for everything and she should just focus on taking care of herself and her family.

Hopefully, that's the last of that.

I wouldn’t be too sure. You purposefully left the door open. I think you need to go to therapy as well to find out why you do this and how to stop.

You're not wrong. I spoke to an old friend of mine over the last few days. He's a psychologist now and used to be part of my support network.

He had an interesting take on things... he thinks that I am supportive and nurturing beyond what can be considered as altruistic.. its actually narcissistic.

So that was a whole can of worms. But I can see where he's coming from. It kind of adds up too. The Jealousy/possessiveness (Sun & Venus in Cancer. Moon, Mars & Saturn in Scorpio) could theoretically manifest itself as narcissim. I also do have a family history of exceptionalism & manipulation. There are a bunch of other traits of mine that collectively seem to suggest that I might have NPD.

I spoke to my ex about it last night. Yeah.. I called cause I needed to talk about things. Anyway.. she suspects that she has Borderline Personality Disorder cause it runs in her family (sister & mother). It explains why she couldn't empathise with me or the position that she had put me in. Between empathy, shame & guilt, she could only feel guilt at that time and she still can't feel the other two towards me.

I'm thinking now that she did have BPD, and I probably triggered her to split with my probable NPD while we're dating and that was probably the root cause of her poor behaviour. This is my own theory based on my psychologist friend telling me that he always thought I was a narcissist. So.. I'm just connecting dots.

Oh.. and narcissist and borderline people go really well with each other, apparently, along with other Cluster B folks. That might explain why all of this is so weird and treetrunked up.

Anyway.. I've unwrangled myself out of that mess and will just deal with me and my issues.

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Knew you had Cancer Venus!! I do this same butter, try too hard to be supportive and nurturing to others.. and I sometimes wonder how altruistic it actually is or what causes me to be that way. I have Mars & Venus in Cancer, Moon in Scorpio. So similar to you just touching different planets. And I had a 5 year relationship with a guy who has BPD. It was the hardest and most self defeating experience I ever went through. Take it from me, keep this door closed. We try too hard for people like this, you'll never get what you want or need from her.

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse
The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

You rescued him and made him happy for 13 years
He wouldn't mind

Thank you. I know, it hurt me more than anything. I felt terrible.

You were sad. Maybe it was too much for you

It had just came on so suddenly, so I didn't have much time to think things through. I just wanted to do everything right.
And after paying almost $ 700 to have a vet come to my house so he could be put down in a familiar, comfortable environment.. I felt like I dropped the ball for just dropping him off with some stranger.

You were distraught, it's understandable. You probably couldn't even think clearly at all at the time so you didn't realise
It really isn't a big deal when you think of all the time you spent with him and how you changed his life for the better
but I get it, it's a regret

Thank you. He just meant a lot to me and our time together was so great, there was nothing else to regret about it so that stood out.

A friend's husband died and they had a little french bulldog who became her soul companion, I suppose. When that dog passed away she cried for months, literally. Now she has a huge dog, it's one of the biggest dogs I've ever seen 😃 she still talks about the bulldog though because that was their family pet when her children were little so they loved him to bits

Thank you for sharing that with me. That must have been so difficult to lose her husband It's nice that she had a little buddy to console her.

Did it take her a long time to get another dog?
I like large the dogs. My guy was real big!

Yes she lost a lot of weight and was drinking way too much. It was tragic, she had a son of 5 and a girl of 2. The son was traumatised
It took a while for her to get a new dog. You can't replace them obv but I think she started to remember all the good times and that made her think about getting one. Then the opportunity came up to get a puppy. I'm not sure what breed it is but omg has it grown quickly!

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I hope she is doing better now! And you're right, ya can't replace them, but it's nice to think about the happiness they bring to our lives. That's also the sad part too, cause it doesn't last long enough.

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse
The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

You rescued him and made him happy for 13 years
He wouldn't mind

Thank you. I know, it hurt me more than anything. I felt terrible.

You were sad. Maybe it was too much for you

It had just came on so suddenly, so I didn't have much time to think things through. I just wanted to do everything right.
And after paying almost $ 700 to have a vet come to my house so he could be put down in a familiar, comfortable environment.. I felt like I dropped the ball for just dropping him off with some stranger.

You were distraught, it's understandable. You probably couldn't even think clearly at all at the time so you didn't realise
It really isn't a big deal when you think of all the time you spent with him and how you changed his life for the better
but I get it, it's a regret

Thank you. He just meant a lot to me and our time together was so great, there was nothing else to regret about it so that stood out.

A friend's husband died and they had a little french bulldog who became her soul companion, I suppose. When that dog passed away she cried for months, literally. Now she has a huge dog, it's one of the biggest dogs I've ever seen 😃 she still talks about the bulldog though because that was their family pet when her children were little so they loved him to bits

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Thank you for sharing that with me. That must have been so difficult to lose her husband It's nice that she had a little buddy to console her.

Did it take her a long time to get another dog?
I like large the dogs. My guy was real big!

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse
The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

You rescued him and made him happy for 13 years
He wouldn't mind

Thank you. I know, it hurt me more than anything. I felt terrible.

You were sad. Maybe it was too much for you

It had just came on so suddenly, so I didn't have much time to think things through. I just wanted to do everything right.
And after paying almost $ 700 to have a vet come to my house so he could be put down in a familiar, comfortable environment.. I felt like I dropped the ball for just dropping him off with some stranger.

You were distraught, it's understandable. You probably couldn't even think clearly at all at the time so you didn't realise
It really isn't a big deal when you think of all the time you spent with him and how you changed his life for the better
but I get it, it's a regret

click to expand

Thank you. He just meant a lot to me and our time together was so great, there was nothing else to regret about it so that stood out.

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse
The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

You rescued him and made him happy for 13 years
He wouldn't mind

Thank you. I know, it hurt me more than anything. I felt terrible.

You were sad. Maybe it was too much for you

click to expand

It had just came on so suddenly, so I didn't have much time to think things through. I just wanted to do everything right.
And after paying almost $ 700 to have a vet come to my house so he could be put down in a familiar, comfortable environment.. I felt like I dropped the ball for just dropping him off with some stranger.

Posted by Wizardz

Posted by blackphvse
The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

You rescued him and made him happy for 13 years
He wouldn't mind

click to expand

Thank you. I know, it hurt me more than anything. I felt terrible.

The day I got my dog & the day I lost him.
18 when I got him - 31 when I lost him.

I regret not opting for the option to have him cremated within a day. It took 3 days and it caused me a lot of turmoil. My boy had separation issues (he was adopted from a shelter) so I was always very adamant about keeping his trust and never leaving him alone with strangers. It didn't hit me until I got home from dropping him off that I had just left his body with a complete stranger and it crushed me. I wish I had opted for the day service and just stayed and waited for him.

Sun in 23° 43' Gemini - 8th House
Moon in 2° 28' Scorpio - 12th House
Mercury in 1° 30' Gemini - 7th House
Venus in 12° 22' Cancer - 8th House
Mars in 28° 54' Cancer - 9th House
Jupiter in 19° 46' Gemini - 8th House
Saturn in 11° 53' Capricorn (r) - 2nd House
Uranus in 3° 45' Capricorn (r) - 2nd House
Neptune in 11° 28' Capricorn (r) - 2nd House
Pluto in 12° 45' Scorpio (r) - 1st House
North Node in 29° 3' Aquarius (r) - 4th House
Chiron in 7° 13' Cancer - 8th House
Ascendant in 9° 27' Scorpio
MC in 19° 36' Leo

Posted by Wizardz
I think being dismissed hurts most as a Gemini
Like some people think we're just shallow and whatever
Makes me want to bring out the bad twin and treetrunk them up

That's kinda what I meant by being ignored. Dismissed is a better word for it.

Posted by LiterallyStalinG

Posted by blackphvse
Ripe sounds like a catch..



XD

Ready to become a statistics on the "My Cancer Man Left Me" board I see.

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I was just kidding. Lol

I been single too long, I need real life action, not online bs.

Ripe sounds like a catch..



XD

Look what happened the last time you helped her.. You ended up in a relationship and she cheated on you, more than once. I think your days of helping her should be over. She's a big girl and can take care of herself. You don't owe her anything at this point. She treetrunked up her current situation and is now trying to see if she can get you back on the hook. Don't let her!

Bob Dylan has a few I really like.

"Some people feel the rain, Others just get wet"

"All I can be is me - whoever that is"

"Gonna change my way of thinking, make myself a different set of rules. Gonna put my good foot forward and stop being influenced by fools."