Aries sun
Aries moon
Cancer Acd
Venus Gemini
Mercury Scorpio

Posted by vesper
I HURT PEOPLE WHILE I'M HURTING.


You? Or are you talking about him? He is hurting. But why push people away who don't hurt you? I know about testing, I used to test people too till I got older. Do they really not see? Or they do see it, but don't believe it?
Men and women have told me this. Especially Virgos...but I don't get along with them either.

Libra and scorpio get along with me like peas in a pod. That's bc one keeps me grounded and the other is pretty much the same
Posted by spur
Posted by krimsinandklover
Posted by Iridessaries
NEVER ignore an Aries!!!!
This will drive us insane. Sometimes it will make us act crazy too 😉


Very true. NEVER ignore an Aries. We absolutely hate it.
I can't speak for other Aries, but I don't ignore someone unless I am busy and have forgotten to get back to them. It takes a lot for me to actually mean to ignore someone; like if they have persistently annoyed me, or I'm just done with them all together.


Yeah same here, I like to think of myself as a mirror, so if a person ignores me long enough. I will just stop talking to them. Same treatment. What is good for the goose is good for the gander. So ignoring will not work in the OP's favor most likely, better to be straight.

This virgo has ignored me for 3 weeks. Normally I wouldn't have tolerated it for that long, tried really hard to understand her excuse for doing so, but I gotta take care of myself. I just deleted her. Cause honestly not good for my mental health, Normally I don't delete people from facebook (3rd person I have ever deleted) I told her that and left. Ignoring confuses the hell out of us because we may have thought you liked us, and now we think you don't. Makes us go insane emotionally and mentally. For me anyway I can't function at all. Can't work/sleep or eat. Almost like depression except I can be happy still haha. Our emotions as Aries can flip on a dime so in 24 hour period under these conditions we can go from happy/sad/angry 75 times in a day. That's what ignoring will do to me anyway.

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Yep yep yep!!!

And ofcourse this Aries looses her heart to a scorpio. Guess what they do best... 😑

My emotions would be flying all over the place within 10 minutes. I'd hate him/love him/kill him/comfort him in 1 phonecall to my best friend 😂😂😂

Just don't ignore an Aries...
Posted by EveryOunce
Why is he allowed to be emotional, have temper tantrums and disappear but you can't even attempt to do anything less than serve him your undying love and devotion? I just don't get it. How can you give so much of yourself to someone undeserving of it? Don't you think deep dowm you deserve more? I also, think too many people put way too much emphasis on a person being a scorpio as an excuse for them to treat them like crap because they think it is cute and mysterious. Oh please, he is just a s hitty boyfriend who needs therapy not a woman at this time.


He doesn't ask me to do these things, I just do. I used to take care of exes for sure, but never like this. Even pourring him coffee made me happy. He never asked, was mostly shocked that someone cared so much. I made him pancakes one morning, no reason. He cried bc no one had ever done that for him before. He took a picture and posted it on fb, saying it was the first time ever he felt real love.
He just couldnt handle it. And I love him to my very core. How do you walk away when you feel that? I don't mind doing what I do, I feel for him bc he runs every time he let's me in just to close up again
Posted by juliette
Anyway, my opinion on him is irrelevant, you want him still, so idk, do something extraordinary for him. Write him a sad love poem using your blood and tears. That will calm him for a certain period of time. I'm not joking.


I think I screwed that up when I had my impulsive meltdown earlier this week. I already mentionned it here. But I was mad and hurt Tuesday and before I knew it I had messaged his friend about everything I'd done for him and how he still kept questionning me. I know that's a big no no for scorpios. Even if his friend gives insight, it s still a bad thing to do in their mind. So, not sure what a poem will do.
Posted by EveryOunce
Why are you so accomodating to someone who could leave you for days on in and not give you one reason as to why he left? He is not short on love he is controlling.


I feel if I answer this I come across as making excuses for him. Which is not the intent, I know what he is doing now is unfair. But here we go anyway.

Yes, he would disappear in the past for 1 or 2 days, but I always knew why though. It didnt make sense but he always said what was in his mind.

I do agree he was/is controlling. He explained this to me once too. I don't think it s malignant controlling, it s part of his being. We had talks about him being controlling, jealous, possessive. Real talks. He feels bad and tries to fight it. When he fights it and overcomes it, it s like a light goes on in him and he realizes what he's done and has been doing before. When it has become "truth" in his head, it never leaves though.
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by Iridessaries
Posted by Impulsv
It's called gas lighting


I know what gas lighting is. But that's done malignant and by not so Nice people.

He wasnt like that. His parents noticed a change in him the last years, just as his friends. He's an open, considerate, sensitive person. Always puts others first.

You don't just wake up one day and become a narcississt. Labels for people are granted so freely. Sigh

I was just confused an hour ago. Not once before did I blame myself nor did he. Just now he said this, never before. He would beat himself up for weeks for acting stupid. He fought it on lots of occassions as well. Narcississts wouldn't do that...ever. I have worked with malignant narcississts and studied them. I would know



Always take the advice here with a grain of salt. You just happened to post about Scorpios around the same time as several other people, and I think you got a reactionary response at least partly because of that.
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I know 😊 today is better as I said it would be. Was just upset last night, and then I get a bit defensive. It's the Aries way 😉

Not sad or confused this morning, just mad. But keeping it in so I don't do anything stupid. Know yourself 😉
Posted by Impulsv
It's called gas lighting


I know what gas lighting is. But that's done malignant and by not so Nice people.

He wasnt like that. His parents noticed a change in him the last years, just as his friends. He's an open, considerate, sensitive person. Always puts others first.

You don't just wake up one day and become a narcississt. Labels for people are granted so freely. Sigh

I was just confused an hour ago. Not once before did I blame myself nor did he. Just now he said this, never before. He would beat himself up for weeks for acting stupid. He fought it on lots of occassions as well. Narcississts wouldn't do that...ever. I have worked with malignant narcississts and studied them. I would know

Not asking advice, just need to vent bc I'm on a rollercoaster right now.
And I know I shouldn't, I did everything I could. But at THIS moment I feel guilty. I defended myself when he falsely accused, I didn't leave immediatly bc I couldnt,... And now he says I always start drama and that he needs time to think.
Is defending yourself considered drama for a scorpio? I didn't act up or anything, I just defended myself. I was never nasty or mean, I was mostly hurt and confused. But drama? 😓
Sorry. Just all over the place now. I know it' s not me, but NOW I just wished I left his house and wandered the streets, or that I just let him think his thoughts without defending myself.

It will be over tomorrow. But now, these questions are clouding my head.
Posted by Evoxxxscorpio
He's gonna make you do a lot of work 70/30 like I said on the other post.


I understand why you would think that. But actually he is very thoughtful and puts in as much an effort as I do. He comes whenever he can, spoils me, frees his time,...

I have zero complaints there. Besides his insecurities and trust issues he's everything I ever wanted.
That smoking can be a probleem. I don't mind my bf smoking, I do it too. But I only do it on Friday or Saturday. When you smoke 3 or 4 daily, you became paranoid and stuck in negativity.
As for of it is over, you 2 are the only ones with answer. I recognize the "punishing" from my scorpio. I don't see at his punishing anymore, more licking their wounds and hiding. Confrontation is scary for a scorpio I believe. And by standing your ground for the first time you probably scared him.

Or...he's just a coward

I have this "nasty" habit of always seeing the good in people. Try reflecting on what happpend and your pov. Then do it from his. I always do this for insight and how to better myself should a similar situation ever come up again
Posted by Reincarnation
Posted by Iridessaries


Confused and hurt

What's your Moon and Venus placement?
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Moon Aries
Venus Gemini
ASC Cancer
Posted by scorpYo
hes treetrunked up girl grab your things and go, I assure you he will never ever change he will be panaroid to the last day of his life so why on earth would you waste more time and feelings than you already did with someone that does not TRUST you?


Because he trusts me with everything else. His kids, staying in house when he's at work, his debetcard,... There are only questions when I'm not with him.
Posted by ThatGemGuy336
Posted by Iridessaries
Why did she break up with you?

I can be friends with an ex if it ended on good terms. Friends is a big word though. Aqquintance would be more correct.

Aries need someone to fight for us and we don't. If that makes sense. If she still loves you, fight. If she doesn't, leave her.

She broke up with my because I wasn't putting her first and I admit I was selfish at the time and did things that weren't showing her I was serious. She says we want different things in a relationship and I wasn't mature enough yet.

The aquintance things make sense but she isn't like that with any of her exs.

I'm okay with moving on but if there is still a chance I want to fight for her. What are things I can do to show her.


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Yeah, we need to be number 1. An Aries will spoil and love you like no other. But if we feel like we're not number 1 we get insecure and take a step back. I can only speak for me on this one, but if I come to a point where I don't feel appreciated I just stop giving as well. We wil let almost everyone in our circle, but if you leave or take the circle for granted you're just out. We wont be mean and cut you off like scorpio. But the giving just stops. You had your chance, now look from the outside. That's how my mind Works anyway.

If you want to fight for her, fight. But not too obvious, we hate that. Give her the feeling she comes first and that you value her. Be a friend and suprise her with little things. We don't care about expensive things. If you pick a flower on the way to her house e.g. we love that.
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Iridessaries
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by Iridessaries
Posted by LadyNeptune
Posted by nikkistar
Posted by PootyButt
Posted by nikkistar
My motto in life: "Never punish the ones that come after, for the one that came before."


It's a great motto. Easier said than done.


Not really, for me.

Sitting there thinking this person is going to do what this other person does is asinine to me. People are individuals that all react differently, it's as simple as that to me.


Instead of staying silent or fueling his behavior by constantly reasuring him each time he got insecure, the op should have reminded him firmly that...
a) she is not the people who have hurt him in the past,
b) it's not fair for her to be punished for past hurts of his, and
c) pointed out that she has been trustworthy thus far.

Instead she reaffirmed his bad behavior and paranoia by choosing to not address it. At this point why would he magically change?



Actually I did a,b and c all the time. All the time!!!


Then at a certain point you need to value yourself enough to walk away and give him the space to realize his insecurity is treetrunking things up so he can start valuing you.



I guess you're right on that. He asked me many times to not give up on him. I never did and stayed. I promised him to not give up, so I stayed patient. That prob was a mistake. Bc now he left and I will never know if me leaving would've helpt. There's no saying he will back either.


As long as you learn from this it isn't a waste of time. In the future you will see men who act this way as major red flags. You will demand more for yourself in your future relationships.

In my experience men who were always questioning my whereabouts, not trusting me despite my actions always being loyal, were actually hiding or cheating on me themselves. They put the spot light on me so that I was too busy defending my actions and whereabouts to questions theirs. Not saying that he was cheating on you/hiding something...but it's a possibility.
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To be honest, He was at one point very secretive of his phone. But I asked him about it and then he immediatly showed me everything (no time for deleting). He wasnt hiding girls or anything, just porn 😀 He thought I'd be upset cause his exes all were. I wasnt 😉 but other then that he was private yes, but not extreme. Going through his phone would be a No ofcourse. But he always said if I had questions he'd always show me. I asked him just that one time.
He knows he has issues and was willing to see someone. But the next day we got into a fight, don't even remember why. But never went back to the subject. That's on me though. I should have brought it up again. But after that fight, it seemed like he saw the light finally and we had 4 months of no questionning. In october everything started again. But different. He questionned less, but when he did he would disappear for a week instead of 1 or 2 days.
He also had a thing in the end where he would just imagine things to the story. I told you we were having some drinks at his house the last time. 2 days later he claimed I got him drunk on purpose... 😓 so strange. I just looked at him in disbelief.

Wow!!! I know my scorp has trust issues. But he didnt isolate me like that. Isolation means you have no one left to rely on but him.
Like others said, that's just one step away from beatings.

If you believe he is a narcississt...RUN AND NEVER LOOK BACK!!! block him completly and never ever get back with him. Narcississts are dangerous and vile. They will destroy you and then destroy you more.

Leave...please!!!
Posted by blackphase
Wow.. this is how butterty I look from the other side

Although, you are very open and reassuring it seems. If I had someone like you, it would probably put all my paranoid thoughts to rest. He seems to have some very big issues with trust and insecurity, I can relate. It generally only intensifies and gets to the stage his is at when we are with someone whom we do not trust.. But you don't seem like you gave him any reason to not trust you. From what you have described, I'm like, where is my male version of that? Lol.. So I am not sure why he is testing you this hard and can't seem to accept your honesty


He can't trust anyone he says, only his diving buddies. And that's just under water. Once they're on solid ground again, the trust goes out the door.
But his insecurities and mistrust were bad. Not just to me, to everyone. I took pics of him and others one day they went diving. Later that night one of the guys texted me to forward the pics to him, my bf was sitting next to me. I just said his buddy texted me, he took out his Ipad and messaged his buddy/collegue/boss really. The anger that he received verbally wasnt that bad but I didnt understand why he was so mad. It was a normaal question. Didnt see him for 2 days after that. He then explained he didnt want his collegue talking about he texting me at work. I know scorps can be jealous, controlling and possessive sometimes. But this gave that a New meaning.

He knows I love him, he just can't believe it I think. I really think he wants to but he just can't.
Why did she break up with you?

I can be friends with an ex if it ended on good terms. Friends is a big word though. Aqquintance would be more correct.

Aries need someone to fight for us and we don't. If that makes sense. If she still loves you, fight. If she doesn't, leave her.
Posted by nikkistar
Posted by Iridessaries
Posted by nikkistar
Posted by Iridessaries

How should I have done this? This is a sincere question. I told him and showed him daily. Not just words, also actions. The wrong actions? I work from home as a writer, so I was either there or he was here. I never hid anything from him. He could come over at all hours...

I did my own thing as well, so he could see I'd always come back. He was just so scared I'd meet someone else.



OP, please don't take offense to how I am writing this to you.

But just by the context of how you write and communicate, you come off as a passive person. That's not a bad thing at all. However, you may have verbalized all of these things, but you told him in a passive connotation and probably with minimal force behind the words. You probably did so in a manner to soothe him, while reassuring him of whom you are.

That's what I see you doing with your Scorpio. I don't see you going full blow rage-fest for his illogical paranoia when it comes to you.


Not offended 😊
There were few times time I went into an Aries fit, true. But when I did, I DID 😀

He was just always about not wanting drama, so I controlled my emotions in front of him. If I was home, I'd go full Aries but he never heard it bc I would just vent to a friend or thin air.
The few times time I went into an Aries fit he'd disappear or he'd apologize for acting stupid.


Yea, I think you having to censor yourself in front of him is a form of passivity.

You should be allowed to be whom you are, and not have to hide those parts of you.


Not to the OP: On a completely different tangent, I guess my hint was taken since the horrendous comment was hidden. To go on a verbal tirade condemning a woman about looks and appearance (calling someone fat, grey-haired, and old is juvenile behavior), who's only error is to have the "audacity" to be in a relationship with a man they are currently lusting after, is grotesque and speaks volumes of your actual nature. And you wonder why he chose someone who "looks like that" over you. That answer is self explanatory with your abhorrent behavior.
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I was myself and I wasn' t. I really enjoyed every little thing I did for him, I would have done this for the rest of my days. So that part was me. But yeah, keeping feelings in so he wouldn't be upset was not always me. I wanted to explode so many times. But I know from in my past, I could/would hurt someone when I did. So I've worked on that the last couple of years. I vented in other ways. Writing, music,... just everything to be the bigger person. Sometimes it still gets the best of me. When I'm really upset or hurt.
Yesterday e.g. I was very emotional and before I knew it, I texted my scorpios friend in despair stating everything I've done for him and it still wasn' t good enough. Been regretting it ever since 🤔