The expectations are yours, what you think he should feel because that is how you would feel in the same situation.
In my experience and with my Libra ex, he walked away never to look back or feel sorry or anything...and that was the hardest thing to take, the complete ignorance of me and my feelings.
BUT in the end you have to deal with YOUR issues and learn to move on from it. You won't get answers or see him get his karma, you won't experience any glory. The longer you wait around for answers or understanding the longer it will take you to be able to move on.
Sometimes, it really is a case of not meant to be and most of the time it is for the better.
I hope you can find the strength to move on and quickly without your feelings being acknowledge by him...
A Libra will only waver if they weren't totally sure themselves that they wanted to end it. If however, they were definite then there's no going back, not permanently anyway.
And yes they will feed you full of shit when you call them out on truths that make them look like cunts, remember they don't like to look bad or be wrong. They will then go behind your back and turn it on you so that everyone that you may be in contact with from the relationship will think that you were at fault and the pyscho ex. You contact him and that will be more ammunition that he will use to prove his theory.
As hard as it is, keep walking and don't look back. You know in yourself what he has missed out on, even if he never does see or feel it!
From my experience, you can pick up a lot by just talking to them online...their profiles mostly are full of it, they create what they want to be. I've read where they say they are humorous and yet nothing further makes you laugh whether in their profiles or when talking to them. I found a lot of guys didn't even say much at all, they didn't ask questions or talk about you or them...
And the 2 I did meet looked nothing like their profile pics, one was much older looking and the other was short!!! My gf, met a guy that had facelifts and looked like Mickey Rourke! Nothing like his pic in his profile.
Think if I hadn't cancelled my membership because I thought it was a complete waste of time, I would in hindsight ask to skype them before meeting in person.
Keep loving the one you want, the new one that does so much for you.
Severely damage your wife and kids because that is what you are doing, you might as well drive a stake through her.
You deserve everything you have got and everything you will get in the future. Your wife may seem understanding but I don't think this is really the case, she's biding her time and plotting what she will do when she leaves.
People like you should just stay single, you know settling down is not for you so why indulge???