You have a wonderful way with words BS, I felt like I was reading a passage from the bible but know this is a part of you and how you feel at times. It has also captured the hearts of many here as we all are feeling like this ourselves or remember not so long ago when we felt this way...

Thank you for sharing and caring

G

Be great to have a Tazer button instead of block

Posted by steponscorpionsCRUNCH

Posted by RealTalk

Posted by sweethearts
I like to kiss my man's big honker...umm that would be his nose, get your mind out of the gutter lol

Yeah because my mind was totally there, lol.

Ya I completely failed your avatar test...lol. In my defense, wth else fouls it be?? xD

click to expand

Yeah that was a set up to lighten the load of this thread

They are getting boring with all the BS bickering, I feel like I've gone back to school and can't enjoy wandering around the boards without walking into shit!!

I'm pretty sure Hulk Hogan ran in through the side door, picked me up in the recliner, then body slammed us both on the carpet, over and over and over again.. I vaguely recall waking up on my side in the fetal position, with tears in my eyes, body soaking wet, both nipples on fire, testicles nowhere to be found, with my left arm tucked under my body in the oddest position, and tingling in my legs! The cat was making meowing sounds I had never heard before, clinging to a picture frame hanging above the fireplace, obviously in an attempt to avoid getting slammed by my body flopping all over the living room.

Note: If you ever feel compelled to 'mug' yourself with a Tazer, one note of caution: There is NO such thing as a one second burst when you zap yourself! You will not let go of that thing until it is dislodged from your hand by a violent thrashing about on the floor! A three second burst would be considered conservative! A minute or so later (I can't be sure, as time was a relative thing at that point), I collected my wits (what little I had left), sat up and surveyed the landscape. My bent reading glasses were on the mantel of the fireplace. ?? The recliner was upside down and about 8 feet or so from where it originally was. ?? My triceps, right thigh and both nipples were still twitching. ?? My face felt like it had been shot up with Novocain, and my bottom lip weighed 88 lbs. ?? I had no control over the drooling. ?? Apparently I had crapped in my shorts, but was too numb to know for sure, and my sense of smell was gone. ?? I saw a faint smoke cloud above my head, which I believe came from my hair. I'm still looking for my testicles and I'm offering a significant reward for their safe return! PS: My wife can't stop laughing about my experience, loved the gift and now regularly threatens me with it! If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!

The directions said that: a one-second burst would shock and disorient your assailant; a two-second burst was supposed to cause muscle spasms and a major loss of bodily control; and a three-second burst would purportedly make your assailant flop on the ground like a fish out of water. Any burst longer than three seconds would be wasting the batteries. All the while I'm looking at this little device measuring about 5" long, less than 3/4 inch in circumference (loaded with two itsy, bitsy AAA batteries); pretty cute really, and thinking to myself, 'no possible way!'

What happened next is almost beyond description, but I'll do my best. I'm sitting there alone, Gracie looking on with her head chickened to one side so as to say, 'Don't do it stupid,' reasoning that a one second burst from such a tiny lil ole thing couldn't hurt all that bad... I decided to give myself a one second burst just for heck of it. I touched the prongs to my naked thigh, pushed the button, and.... HOLY MOTHER OF GOD. WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION. WHAT THE... !!!

ONLY A MAN WOULD ATTEMPT THIS Just try reading this without laughing till you cry!!!( I couldn't stop laughing) ...

Pocket Tazer Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Tazer for their anniversary submitted this: Last weekend I saw something at Larry's Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 15th anniversary and I was looking for a little something extra for my wife Julie. What I came across was a 100,000-volt, pocket/purse-sized Tazer. The effects of the Tazer were supposed to be short lived, with no long term adverse affect on your assailant, allowing her adequate time to retreat to safety...?? WAY TOO COOL! Long story short, I bought the device and brought it home...

I loaded two AAA batteries in the darn thing and pushed the button. Nothing! I was disappointed. I learned, however, that if I pushed the button and pressed it against a metal surface at the same time, I'd get the blue arc of electricity darting back and forth between the prongs. AWESOME!!! Unfortunately, I have yet to explain to Julie what that burn spot is on the face of her microwave. Okay, so I was home alone with this new toy, thinking to myself that it couldn't be all that bad with only two AAA batteries, right?

There I sat in my recliner, my cat Gracie looking on intently (trusting little soul) while I was reading the directions and thinking that I really needed to try this thing out on a flesh & blood moving target. I must admit I thought about zapping Gracie (for a fraction of a second) and then thought better of it. She is such a sweet cat. But, if I was going to give this thing to my wife to protect herself against a mugger, I did want some assurance that it would work as advertised. Am I wrong? So, there I sat in a pair of shorts and a tank top with my reading glasses perched delicately on the bridge of my nose, directions in one hand, and Tazer in another.

Had to share this to bring a tear of two to your eyes. Don't know how many times I have read it but it has the same effect EVERYTIME!!

Enjoy

Me too these days....too much crap going down here with all the kids squabbling over being blocked!! Crazy, it's hard to find a thread where they aren't bickering in.

All great over here in the land of Oz. New project on the horizon and a whole new life

I believe the meaning behind it is whatever you perceive it to be, how you feel about the person and how you feel in the moment. I have experienced forehead kisses and thought nothing of them and then again I like to kiss my man's big honker...umm that would be his nose, get your mind out of the gutter lol

I love it and I know he likes it when I do, it's a joke between us because it often gets in the way

Hey LS,

Nice to see you popping back from time to time too.

Hope all is well in your camp

Would love to hear where she is at 3-4 years on

thelibran has been on this site for years, he knows and respects advice from fellow leebs, that's why he's here!

Firstly she obviously had never gotten over her ex whether it's for revenge or whatever. What an idiot, she cuts off her nose despite her face risking the happiness of her current relationship for payback! She will lose both men in the end and will not realise this until she has lost the one she was probably happy with. Hope your friend is strong enough to kiss her of now!!! Wouldn't want to make the mistake of marrying or having children with this gal!

Great thread Exo!

I see it as a place to come when bored with RL, it's another world in here with personalities I know and new entrants springing up all the time. At times it's crazy and you see school yard tactics and people that come to vent frustrations on total strangers. Personality clashes and know it alls.

I myself have been guilty of being grumpy and impatient when the most obvious questions are asked and threads are made again and again trying desperately to get the answers they want to hear.

Most of all it is another world, one which we can enjoy the anonymity, seek answers and help others, if this is what we want. One which I happily stay as it's now apart of my life.

What part of your body does he like the most? Is he a boob or bum man? Is he even a visual man? Because if he isn't then it does nothing for him. Know your man and what he likes if you want to please him.

**Like!*

So hard to get a permanent here in Aussie. The bosses hold all the cards!

I thought it was let it go over your head..

Dazed??

It's either on or off for me, no career or anything will get in the way if I want you. I think its just an excuse because he feels you want something and he really really likes having you around as a mate. Sorry but that is how I have been in the past but then I am a black and white person no grey's!

General rant Wynter, I have been blocked I believe because someone hasn't liked my opinion but it doesn't bother me. A lot of people come for advice but only want to hear why they want to hear.

It's when you are reading threads and then all of a sudden you realise a post is missing because someone is referencing someone else's comment or right smack int he middle of it they start backstabbing someone that can't respond or threads are created and the person it's about can't respond. **shakes head** out of school!

And no DG, I haven't experienced that. I have seen where some posters continually post vids and pics...do I read, No. And if someone purposly attacks me, I'll argue/defend a bit but it;s not long before I realise that they are purely trying to bully or pick a fight and I don't respond.

You know happy people live longer and age better than angry people (general comment, not directed at anyone)

With me, the guy that wants to sleep with you and keep their options open, many guys that these threads are all about. The ones that run from any sign of commitment and by commitment I mean not calling you gf because I'm not sure it's what I want..(keeping their options open)

Gangsters are bad boys too however over here that type you have to go looking for they have their hangouts or maybe I'm oblivious.

Good guys are very easy to recognise. They date you and want to do everything with you and they want to introduce you to their families and friends and want to label you their gf's straight up. They don't shy from that talk because they are the ones that bring it up first.