Why do you block people?? Aren't you open enough to others opinions or can't you overlook their comments if you don't agree or like them?

Do other DXPers effect you that much that you seriously can't do one or both of these?

I've had issues with people here, I simple chose not to register them, or let their comments effect me.

But it is childish to see people BACKSTABBING each other through others post because someone they have blocked has been highlighted!

I might be old and wise but seriously there are a lot of children on this site and most of them are in their 30's or close to it!

You're still young and although it was a tough lesson and one that you have learnt from two sides, it'll make you stronger and a better person when the next true love comes around. Don't be jaded either by her, but learn from how you felt when you were left thinking it was because of your discrepancy that you may have lost out...

Live and learn as the saying goes.

I was a lover of the bad boy..well I am always attracted to that sort but the good/safe guys give you sooo much more. My ex-husband was one and my current love is also. When I am weighing the good with the bad through our relationship and not feeling happy for whatever reason, the great things that he offers far outweigh the bad every time and I know it is me that has to learn more.

Try it ladies, you might find yourself happy 90% of the time!!

Geez I hope you really want it! lol because when the little suckers finally make up their mind and want you permanently they don't let go!!!!

And in saying that you still feel like you are on a roller coaster rider! Enjoy and welcome to Libra bliss.......or not

Yeah I have read this several times as it has been sent twice. Everytime I want to have a good laugh I'll look this one up

OMG SL!!! is that what it looks like??

ahahaha

...you REEK DESPERATION but clearly can't see it. He can!! Men do not like to be smothered when they first start dating. He's probably got a few of you on the go as you did meet online...

You'll get the truth from others here too but already it's evident that you only want to hear what you want to hear

and you're quite the angry little girl when you don;t get what you want...

Hence the reason he's jerking you around...you're acting like he owes you something after 1 month...good luck with that

A little over a month???

You know you should be married by now.. right??!!!

Hey VB, knew you'd come back...they always come back... or lurk around observing some of the mayhem

He said that our relationship isnt healthy....and that I have been a very important person in his life and hopes we can continue talking as he would hate to lose contact with me completely.


Wow, quite the young man. Not many ladies get an explaination. He obviously cares and is quite mature. Be thankful for this.

You know one thing I have learnt and am experiencing now in my relationship is that you lose a little love for the other person each time you have a big fight, esp if it is uncalled for or you don't understand the persons reasoning/motives/actions.

Remember when you first fell in love, they could do nothing wrong, then there was the first fight and the make up sex after that, then the second fight, still intense and you still tried hard to resolve, then the third, and the fourth, and the fifth...starting to get a little over this shit now...especially if it starts becoming frequent or too frequent. Now I'm feeling like I'm getting picked on or always doing something wrong and having to say sorry..not exactly sure why but I'll do it to help things run smoothly. Then the sixth and seventh and my minds starting to think differently and I'm starting to stick to my guns...then you start questioning what's really happening and if this is it or will it get better?? Can I keep going I can see a pattern, do I want this??

Everyone has a different breaking point...

we have broken up before and our arguments always go the same way (something gets under my skin and when I try to talk about it, instead of listening and being understanding, he interprets it as me blaming him or nagging him, and then I dont get the response I need from him (i.e he gets defensive) and then I get upset and we argue about our communication style )


She doesn't know how to express herself without making it sound to him like she is nagging. They are speaking two different languages, until she learns how to speak and explain herself ( and there is a way to do it with the way things are worded) he will hear nag nag nag even if it is an apology! Obviously it isn't the first time.

Leave him alone to sort out in his mind what he wants...you will continue to look like a nag if that's the way he is already feeling. He may reconsider but in all honesty if you were constantly sweating the small stuff you have probably pushed him to his limit and beyond. You need to take a look at what you are arguing over all the time, were they just your own insecurities ?? If so, look to change. If they were both, maybe you ae not ass compatible as you want.

Also being friends only works after a good long break, there's always one that wants more.

Clean break, not an easy ask but far better for you in the long run.

You know it takes 30 days to break a habit, any habit...you get past those 30 days and you are on your road to recovery.

Good luck

We are all bought up on fairy tales, it use to be boy meets girl boy rescues girl and they live happily ever after...even the fairy tales have changed somewhat...now it seems to be boy and girl meet, they don't hit it off they have a love hate relationship, problems and then they work things our and get together living happily ever after.

Personally, I think a lot of people expect to be swept off their feet or to fall in love at first sight or liken romance to movies. As we are what we eat, some of us are what we watch!

Gucci Guilty is devine!! And I picked up a cheap bottle of David Beckhams, The Essence which is beautiful and light for daytime

I know you hate this saying SL but I believe it holds a lot of value...Why buy the cow if the milk comes free? If you move in with a guy and give him everything a marriage has to offer without the contract then why would he take it to the next step..unless that is what he originally wants himself without pressure from the other party. This could be the other way around but it is generally the woman that wants marriage.

Maybe if it's marriage people want, then they need to find out what the person also wants before spending too much time and effort on them. You can find out their values easy enough by asking straight up what they want out of life without making them feel like they have to ask you right there and then.

But evidently you have to date the same type because trying to change someone isn't going to work and there are a lot of people these days that really aren't interested in getting married period!

Delete his number and any contact you have of him that can make it easy when you are weak. If he sends any message delete or straight away and try not to read it.

But that's only as Theultra says...is this a permanent thing or just a means to wake him up and try and get him back??

Posted by P-Angel
Being insecure isn't something someone else can do to you. Him cheating didn't cause you to be insecure .. you're own emotional weakness causes you to be insecure.


he was the effec, not the cause


The longer you wallow in your self pity, the longer you'll convince yourself that you have no duty in healing from the emotional injury, which will result in your own lonliness.


I'm sure him cheating hurt your heart ... but YOU are the one who continues to hurt it by claiming that he was worth you to hold onto it .. why the fuck would you give a cheater so much credit that they deserve to own your heart like that?


Bull-fucking-shit ... if you actually want to a strong and confident woman then YOU will take charge of yourself.

@ P that was insightful, I wouldn't have thought of it in this way and it helps with old wounds. Thanks

You have to take into account how someone is raised

Everybody's parents/guardians don't raise them to be 100% for commitment or marriage

Then you have to take into account how them witnessing failed marriages, failed relationships or seeing staggering marriage/divorce statistics have affected their mentality about committment/marriage

There's so much that goes into it that shapes someone's fundamental ideals about commitment/marriage: media, personal experience (some have already went that route before they met you & b/c it failed or wasn't as fulfilling as they thought, decided not to believe in it anymore), what they've been taught by their peers, what they've been taught by their guardians, maturity/age level, etc.

^^^^ This..reading this and thinking about it. My mother has done exactly what I have replicated. One dad 4 children and one long term live in partner, no marriage.

Although one of my brothers won't marry, he has been with his gf for 15 years and they have one child. The other two are in marriages and still together after numerous years and children.

@Capgirl. Don't they now live in a de-facto relationship which means unless there is a pre-nup he is already entitled to 50% of everything! Works that way in this country and my homeland whether its a gay or hetro relationship.