I think the first thing you should do is to be honest with yourself.

What is it that you want from life, from her and from yourself in general.

Then see how she fits into that equation.

Some people are worth making the effort for but its not necessarily the effort we have in mind. Others we think are worth making the effort for but when we check ourselves and get our own heads straight we realise those people weren't really worth the effort in the first place.

She does seem like a genuine decent person though. You just need to understand and decided what it is you want form her and how she fits into your life, have the talk, and then move forwards.

Its not something you want to spend time analysing and understanding. Been there done that and it did not benefit me at all.

What did benefit me was to stop wasting my time, improve myself apply an abundance mentality move on with my life and become happy within myself.

Real happiness is form within and not reliant on how someone else sees your worth.
Posted by Ellygant
Posted by MrR78
Well, I can speak from personal experience and what I have learnt.

I was madly in love with an Aquarius woman, and we worked together (still do), and she was considerably younger than me. I THOUGHT she was the one and when she spoke to her parents about me they did not agree due to the age difference and my ex broke up with me.

I was pretty devastated and evidence can be found of that on DXP. I looked for answers everywhere and just could not find them, made excuses for my ex's behaviour etc. I was miserable for a year.

Since we broke up (just over a year now) she went back to her ex, and her parents said no to him, they have since introduced her to another boy and she was dating him for a while and that has also died a death. Now she seems miserable in life in general, issues at home, single, and problems with her family while I took the time out to look at my flaws improve myself and generally become a happy person once again.

Now I am talking to someone and hopefully I will make it official this weekend. This girl is amazing and has all the qualities I want in a woman. She is smart, mature, emotionally mature, driven, focussed, beautiful, funny, has a sense of humour, humble and aggressive when she needs to be.

They myth of the one in my opinion is a limitation because we attached ourselves to a person or an outcome.

There is an abundance of people to date in this world and somewhere at someone point, someone is also looking to date just as much as we are.

The bottom line is to accept your flaws, improve yourself and make yourself attractive to the opposite sex once again. Do not attach yourself to a person or an outcome, just be the best you can be and the universe will bring you a person into your life who is suitable. How long they are suitable for is unknown, but the best thing I can say is to laugh and live in the present.

The past is the past, they are not the "one anymore" the future is unknown and we can only control what we have now, the present!!

So the point I am making is that not moving on completely is a personal limitation we put on ourselves, our happiness, sadness, misery, relationships, love etc are all in our hands. We to some degree control our own destiny!!!


Well of course there are always people to date and people to love.

That’s why I’m interested in people who still never quite move on from a particular partner. People who still hold a piece of their past in the present and maintain a sense of being and of happiness.

Finding new people is actually pretty easy. Loving someone for decades who you’ll likely never be with, yet still being happy about your life, doesn’t seem as easy lol.
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@Ellygant - I see your point of view. This is quite an interesting thread because a lot of what people write will be down to personal experience and that's something that is personal to all of us. None of us will ever share the same as someone else.

Saying that though - I have happy memories of ex's but Id say I have completely let them go. Now is this possibly based on astrology and charts?

Well, I can speak from personal experience and what I have learnt.

I was madly in love with an Aquarius woman, and we worked together (still do), and she was considerably younger than me. I THOUGHT she was the one and when she spoke to her parents about me they did not agree due to the age difference and my ex broke up with me.

I was pretty devastated and evidence can be found of that on DXP. I looked for answers everywhere and just could not find them, made excuses for my ex's behaviour etc. I was miserable for a year.

Since we broke up (just over a year now) she went back to her ex, and her parents said no to him, they have since introduced her to another boy and she was dating him for a while and that has also died a death. Now she seems miserable in life in general, issues at home, single, and problems with her family while I took the time out to look at my flaws improve myself and generally become a happy person once again.

Now I am talking to someone and hopefully I will make it official this weekend. This girl is amazing and has all the qualities I want in a woman. She is smart, mature, emotionally mature, driven, focussed, beautiful, funny, has a sense of humour, humble and aggressive when she needs to be.

They myth of the one in my opinion is a limitation because we attached ourselves to a person or an outcome.

There is an abundance of people to date in this world and somewhere at someone point, someone is also looking to date just as much as we are.

The bottom line is to accept your flaws, improve yourself and make yourself attractive to the opposite sex once again. Do not attach yourself to a person or an outcome, just be the best you can be and the universe will bring you a person into your life who is suitable. How long they are suitable for is unknown, but the best thing I can say is to laugh and live in the present.

The past is the past, they are not the "one anymore" the future is unknown and we can only control what we have now, the present!!

So the point I am making is that not moving on completely is a personal limitation we put on ourselves, our happiness, sadness, misery, relationships, love etc are all in our hands. We to some degree control our own destiny!!!
I dated a Virgo years ago when I moved from Australia to the UK. She was my first girlfriend when I moved here and were both in our early 20s.

Whilst the relationship was somewhat "immature" she is actually my oldest friend in this country. I have known her for 19 years now and we are still going strong as friends.

Now from personal experience looking back at her as a girlfriend and also a very close friend I can say that what attracted me to her was her carefree attitude. I was quite highly strung at that time mentally. She was attracted to my focus and drive and determination.

Our communication style s were very different, she would not open up and all I did was want to open up and talk so it became tedious for the both of us.

One fundamental difference I have found between Leos and Virgos (my brother is a virgo and so are 5 of my closest friends) is that emotionally and mentally we are very different.

I find that Virgos are also emotionally driven creatures but they are driven for different reasons to Leos. Another thing I have found is that mentally when I engage in proper dialogue (ie ask a Virgo to back up their statements or provide facts evidence etc) they seem to think in the moment at that point as opposed to what the original question was or fail to see how the conversation has progressed to reach the point its at now. That was and still is very frustrating for me.

Saying that though the one thing I do love about Virgos is that when they feel comfortable or and safe in a relationship they do tend to put everything into it and it can be amazing. My issue with them was I found them to be inconsistent, Leos like consistency.

So from personal experience, yes I was attracted to Virgos at one point in my life when I was younger, but experiences have taught met now to keep away form them romantically (also Taurus). But I do understand the attraction and energy a leo and Virgo can feel when the "lust or attraction phase" is in play.

Over time though, I think the differences are too big. This is all from personal experience, I am sure there are successful virgo/leo couples out there. Also you need to take into consideration other factors like the moon sign etc. These things all make a difference as it not just the sun sign that needs to be considered.

Hope this helps.
@aquarius_man - lol ok is the aries worse than an aquarius in that sense? Learnt a lot from my Aqua ex in respect of myself so hopefully the same issues aren't made with the Aries.

The series is called Cane and Abel mate. I was in the gym doing some stick and knife work and we were approached by the guy making the film asking us to be in the scene. We were like yeah whatever. Turns out the producer is a nice guy and we became mates. We shot half the scene for the film. 2 days later he tells Netflix have contacted him and they want to do a 10 part series. So he now has to stretch 1hr 30 film in 10 50 min episodes.

@Bittercupcake - Hmm I cant really be temperamental and jealous unless something is triggered inside of me. Come to think of it I am not the jealous type because I value my freedom a lot.

But thank you for the advice. She seems quite bubbly and has a zest for life which is what I like
@Chuckem - Well the zest for life is back mate. Currently training a mate for a charity MMA fight in 2 weeks and have also landed a few fight scene in an up and coming Netflix productions for a martial arts series.

@Aquarius_man - I hear you, Leos generally aren't cowards until we get over emotional then we turn from lions into cats lol
lol.. I am glad I am none of those things.
Hi Guys

I have been recently talking to an Aries lady and I find her energy and vibe positive. She seems to be a happy go lucky person which is what I like. I am a Leo, and I hear that Leo males and Aries Females tend to get on very well.

So I am here for some advice. I am hoping to see her for the first time this weekend.

1.) What qualities to Aries Women like in a man?
2.) What is the best way to attract an Aries woman and make a lasting impression.
3.) What is it about guys that Aries women do not like.

Thanks in advance.
@seraph - thank you so much. Wise words and they make complete sense.

@aquarius_man - what were your circumstances if you don't mind me asking. I have no problem stealing her, the issue is that even today despite being with someone else she has a massive wall built for me and I know I still affect her. It as clear as it can be in her behaviour. She is not indifferent at all, she pretends to be but as soon as I am mentioned in some emotional manner, she just puts up the wall until the problem goes away. I really think she is about to get married in a rebound manner because her parents have found her someone.

Problem with that is, when she does realise, she will have hurt more people than she can thing of.
@sierra - then you just ignore it lol.

@seniorita_ll - good for you. Atleast something positive came out of something negative
See blocking again is a form of ghosting in my opinion.

May be ghosting/blocking is a phenomenon amongst the younger generation. My ex is a lot younger than me when we started to speak again, she blocked me on wotsapp but not the phone. It was only when I said we couldn't be friends she blocked me on the phone and presumably deleted my number.

Why cant people just delete number like they used to and just move on. Maybe being a younger generational thing the older generations don't understand it.

I am not criticising anyone if they do ghost as it works for them, but personally I don't see how that brings any form of emotional growth. Gosh I sound old lol
@Compy - what makes you think my ex respects me
I did try to talk my way back into the relationship. I was told I gave her lots to consider and we will talk. Same old BS I had before and then told we can be friends. When I asked for closure via email and got ignored, then I called her a few days later. She said she didn't want to talk about it and I keep on asking to. Every valid point I made was dismissed.

It was at that point I realised that without respect there is very little hence why I said we cant be friends. I am past wanting to reconcile and I know my ex will fall hard in the future because she doesn't think for herself.

It would be nice just to have a talk and clear the air. But I have given up on that as well now.

Its funny because while we were talking she kept saying how amazing I am and how I have changed for the better and how I am now even more amazing.

Anyways it is what it is, I feel a weight has been lifted and I am far too good for her now. I still believe my ex has not dealt with her emotions regarding our break up and that's why she keeps that door closed. Not sure how this helps Aquas but as a Leo it would eat me up inside
Yes I have been the victim of it. My ex did it to me and we work together as well. Its been a year and I still don't have answers. She has moved on not once but twice. In my case its her parents who are controlling and didn't let the relationship move forward. Now she is with someone that her folks approve of.

I have asked for closure countless times and my ex just refuses to give it to me. I have a thread on it at the moment.

https://www.dxpnet.com/opinion/astrology/exs-not-giving-closure--9181634/
@magma2 - I couldn't have said it better. Thank you it means a lot. The sad story is that going forward her house will always be built on sand unless she changes, and you cant change until you start thinking for yourself. That's just reality!!!
Well atleast you got something. My ex completely ghosted me until I reached out to her. Even then she tested the waters and then when SHE decided she needed me she reached out. My ex definitely cant handle her emotions especially towards me. As for rebounds well her ex after me was a rebound and I think her current bf was introduced by family. She really doesn't think and does not want to face whatever issues she has with me. Its up to her and its her loss.

Yes I agree not getting closure can be really toxic.

It makes me think sometimes, do people who don't give closure actually realise their mistake at some point or do they just go through life completely ignoring it and accepting the present?
@aerial view - whats the venus and mars synastry
I ask the question because everywhere you look regarding astrology, it is always the sun that is compared. Yet once you look into it further you realise that there are so many other variables that come into play.

Yes its down to each individual so I figured I do a post and see what people think.

Here are 2 examples

1.) Suns match and the two people get on great but the moons clash so there is a difference in understanding or processing emotional issues differently which may cause issues or

2.) Suns clash - 2 people have different methods of thinking, outlook on life, the way they do things, but the moons match so they have some form of emotional stability.

Which works better? Yes its an open question and different for everyone but its food for thought.