Nemesis

one of my most favourite quotes of all time:

"people don´t always tell you what they´re thinking, they just to it that you don´t advance in life (love or choose your word)"

it´s from hannibal lecter.

Posted by Placidd

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Placidd

Posted by NemDeux
wtf does she even mean with "do the right thing?" 10 bucks she has no clue what that is.

it´s reallllly just a prolonged bullbutter answer. could have had that closure sooner

how do you feel about that reply of hers? don´t you feel a bit compromised?

wait, i know what you meant now that i thought about it. yes i did feel compromised. I think that if i kept pushing it things would have just gotten worse; As it was, I didnt want to make things any more tense than they already were. what would you think would have happened if i did? honest curiosity.

there are three scenes i see happening ....

you keep pushing ....i think you are doing yourself an injustice here by stating that; all you did was reacted to her bait ....but anyhow the three things i could see happening:
1.) she becomes more and more wishy washy and tantilizing you
2.) causes a fight so there are legit reasons to break off ties
3.) most probable: treetrunking ghosts you.

I imagined both 1 and 3 and I agree with you completely. 2 is also possible but the others are more what Ive experienced. But I get the impression I should have pressed for a clear NON-bullbutter answer... the evidence suggests she still either loves her ex or, is not over him and knows im not an answer to that.

click to expand

it´s very late here - even for nocturnal pisceans - so i´ll chime in tomorrow. and check out what other people write as well. in closing - i just want to say that you never really know what motivates people to act or react in certain ways; and sometimes you will not get a definitive satisfactory answer. this is when your own responsibility checks in and gives yourself the closure you need. see you round P! stay placid bro! sending hugs!

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

You know, I've had this thought swirling around my head for several months. It's only now that I voiced it (I tend to have flickers of ideas/inspiration and then (temporarily) forget about them just as quickly).

So, Pisces moon strikes again...

yep ...

Are you saying you don't believe me?

your pisces moon interpretation is egging my scorp moon not a bad thing, per se.

Stop speaking in Piscean riddles, woman!

are you not fluent in gibberish yet?! smh.

My Cap Mercury won't allow it...

Btw, I have a photo that would literally give you an orgasm. When the time's right, I'll post it.

haha mr. broomstick! okay. you know, patience is a virtue. i´ll be ready. for the pic lol.

I spotted it, last week, and you immediately sprang to mind...

click to expand

you know where to find me. show me when you think i am ready

as for now, toodles ....it´s 1.30 AM ....night!

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

You know, I've had this thought swirling around my head for several months. It's only now that I voiced it (I tend to have flickers of ideas/inspiration and then (temporarily) forget about them just as quickly).

So, Pisces moon strikes again...

yep ...

Are you saying you don't believe me?

your pisces moon interpretation is egging my scorp moon not a bad thing, per se.

Stop speaking in Piscean riddles, woman!

are you not fluent in gibberish yet?! smh.

My Cap Mercury won't allow it...

Btw, I have a photo that would literally give you an orgasm. When the time's right, I'll post it.

click to expand

haha mr. broomstick! okay. you know, patience is a virtue. i´ll be ready. for the pic lol.

Posted by Placidd

Posted by NemDeux
wtf does she even mean with "do the right thing?" 10 bucks she has no clue what that is.

it´s reallllly just a prolonged bullbutter answer. could have had that closure sooner

how do you feel about that reply of hers? don´t you feel a bit compromised?

wait, i know what you meant now that i thought about it. yes i did feel compromised. I think that if i kept pushing it things would have just gotten worse; As it was, I didnt want to make things any more tense than they already were. what would you think would have happened if i did? honest curiosity.

click to expand

there are three scenes i see happening ....

you keep pushing ....i think you are doing yourself an injustice here by stating that; all you did was reacted to her bait ....but anyhow the three things i could see happening:
1.) she becomes more and more wishy washy and tantilizing you
2.) causes a fight so there are legit reasons to break off ties
3.) most probable: treetrunking ghosts you.

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

You know, I've had this thought swirling around my head for several months. It's only now that I voiced it (I tend to have flickers of ideas/inspiration and then (temporarily) forget about them just as quickly).

So, Pisces moon strikes again...

yep ...

Are you saying you don't believe me?

your pisces moon interpretation is egging my scorp moon not a bad thing, per se.

Stop speaking in Piscean riddles, woman!

click to expand

are you not fluent in gibberish yet?! smh.

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

You know, I've had this thought swirling around my head for several months. It's only now that I voiced it (I tend to have flickers of ideas/inspiration and then (temporarily) forget about them just as quickly).

So, Pisces moon strikes again...

yep ...

Are you saying you don't believe me?

click to expand

your pisces moon interpretation is egging my scorp moon not a bad thing, per se.

should have put this on the scorp board .....

Posted by Gobby

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

You know, I've had this thought swirling around my head for several months. It's only now that I voiced it (I tend to have flickers of ideas/inspiration and then (temporarily) forget about them just as quickly).

So, Pisces moon strikes again...

click to expand

yep ...

Posted by Gobby

Posted by Cyrano_de_Bergerac
Dress conservatively. Don't wanna show too much leg. Some of those guys have been there for a really long time. Just cause a man is dead don't mean he ain't got no hankering...

Yes, it's only a matter of time before someone from the #metoo movement claims that they were sexually assaulted by a ghost...

click to expand

too late. the entity is all i´m saying. watch or read at your own risk

wtf does she even mean with "do the right thing?" 10 bucks she has no clue what that is.

it´s reallllly just a prolonged bullbutter answer. could have had that closure sooner

how do you feel about that reply of hers? don´t you feel a bit compromised?

is the timing any way significant? did something happen during august when you guys were together; some nostalgia?

my ex is not an aqua - but i do see a pattern when my ex does troll me - sometimes it´s a song link; or lyric, sometimes it´s an arrogant comment, or a picture of his latest flame .....

i take it all with humour.

unintrusive people. that makes me happy.

hugs and booze to you!

Posted by Placidd
We met two years ago through a mutual friend and we live several hours away from each other. We didn’t meet until a year later but it was a great night for the both of us and we decided to see where things went. She started pushing me away so I let it go until January when she got back in touch with me apologizing for what she did, and explained a valid reason why she couldn’t bring herself to tell me.

Around our birthdays she got back in touch with me saying she wanted to try things with me again, but disappeared until May saying that she felt really scared and that her indecisiveness about it wasn’t a good enough answer to give me. Nonetheless, she was there to make the effort.

We kept in touch and I asked her on a date in her city mid-June. She agreed but changed her mind several days later, saying shed feel more comfortable waiting until she can see me (couldnt travel). We talked over the phone and she admitted embarrassingly that I was perfect and that I was everything she’s ever wanted, adding that she’s just scared of letting someone new into her life because of her past relationship of around 8 years (has been single for about 2-3 years at this point). She told me despite that her goal was to be in a relationship with me.

When her first visit came in July, she stayed with friends and avoided seeing me despite inviting me out. The following week I asked her what the truth was and she said she felt like her heart is stuck in the past, and doesn’t know how to let me in but she wants to give us a chance because she really likes me. I replied saying we just needed time spent together. She explained why she couldn’t open up so easily and eventually discussed her attachment to her ex, besides being together for so long. On top of his emotional abusiveness, a couple years after they first got together they had an aborted pregnancy, and her parents (who never liked him) encouraged her to cut contact. After a while they met again and tried once more but had a lot of problems, so they stopped and she started seeing other people, and had a FWB so she wouldn't be lonely. After about a year or so of that she met me, and said I was the first person to move her heart so much since her ex.

Nonetheless she still said I was everything she wanted, and felt an indescribable connection with me since we met and kept in touch. She came to see me the following weekend and we had an amazing time together. It was honestly perfect for me and I could feel that she enjoyed herself just as much, from the things she was saying to me. After a celebration at a friend’s, we went back to my apt and drank a little more, but not too much to get drunk because we were going to play an online game with some friends of mine.

Avoiding TMI, she makes a move on me and I ask her several times if she was sure to which she replied “yes, I want to be with you”. Partway in being intimate she stops me and goes to my bathroom where I hear her crying.
After about half an hour she came out and said she felt like an idiot and guilty. She started crying more when she stated how much she likes me, then proceeded to say that she can’t get over her past, adding “I don’t know what I want.” She said that she was going to go through her motions and not think about how she feels. As we talked, she also said her ex wasn’t going to talk to her anymore, yet said the last time they talked was back in June. She said that although they don’t talk he works in the downtown area of her city, saying he knows that she likes to go there with her friends. I was shocked so I threw a calm fit, stating my fears about that. After a while I comforted her until she calmed down and fell asleep. She went home the next day (Sunday), joking about how broken she was before she left.

The following weekend she said she’d been thinking about what she wants and feels confused about her feelings. She had been keeping herself busy because she doesn’t want to think about how bad she feels which was why she had been avoiding talking to me, and doesn’t know what to do in order to be happy or to stop feeling the way she does. She added that she doesn’t know what to do with herself other than to figure herself out before she makes a mistake.

I sent her a long message including the following:
-- Acknowledging her confusion
-- understanding she is on the fence about commitment and wants to control the situation
-- explaining that her ex had a long time to prove he was a good fit for her but has given her grief and prevented her from being happy
-- explained my desire not to give up, that I was willing to be as patient as I could and that we just need to spend more time together in person
-- relating to her feelings of confusion and possible anger, fear, etc.

A few days later, she got in touch with me saying she thinks she’s made her mind up and would get back to me that night, but never followed up. I texted her the next day saying I was anxious and wondering what was on her mind.

This was her reply that night:

“I feel like im just pushing myself into having a relationship with someone in order for me to let go of my past. Ive realized that yes, I like you, but I don’t think im ready to give you my heart. Not because you wouldn’t deserve it, but because ive realized that im not ready to let anyone in. I don’t want to be hurting you or makng you feel anxious like now just because of the place im stuck in. I feel I need to spend some time alone in order for me to let go before I start over. I wanted to give myself, and us, a chance but I don’t think this is the right way and if I want things to go good for me, I have to do whats right even if I hate having to say it.”

She explained to me that she wanted to do the right thing over the phone the previous Wednesday by telling me that before we met, but wanted to give us two a chance to meet so she didn’t. From that, I personally feel like us embracing each other was just moving way too fast.

I told her I was happy she told me the truth and that I wished her the best in whatever she needed to do for herself. I told her to take care, that maybe one day we could reconnect with each other. I haven’t heard back from her, but I can imagine she is in pain by having to let go of someone she’s admitted she really likes and hurt by not being over her past. Or, it may just be my own naivety and not realizing that after that weekend I was no longer significant to her in any way and she wanted to end things without hurting my feelings.
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I want her in my life, but I think that what the two of us need right now is to NOT talk to each other. The stress is gone and I wonder if I did the right thing or just the easy thing. I’ve thought about if it’s worth the stress and I’m divided. Despite the immaturity I’ve experienced from her she has qualities I’ve been searching for in a partner. I don’t really know if this is “see you later” or “goodbye”, but I know I have to let the situation go. The thought remains that I feel like I gave up on someone who means a lot to me/care about very much. I know it’s a complicated situation, and I know she’s a handful better left alone. But after all this I don’t want to hate her for what’s happened. I know I have to try meeting someone else and let time pass, but I feel like she’ll always have my heart.
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But there it is… I guess right now I just want to grieve over it so I can let go but it’s hard to even feel sad and I may still be in shock. Like I mentioned earlier, it’s hard for me to even see it as a goodbye, and it’s hard for me to see it as see-you-later. I don’t have a plan, I don’t know what to think, and I feel like I lost a friend. May I ask for some comfort, advice, comments, support from you all? I’d love to hear what you have to say. Thanks for reading this in advance!

hey

of course, not knowing the dynamics and the chemistry it´s easy for a stranger on the net to drop a comment non-chalant ....BUT i found her explanation to you such a cheap sleezy shot. very non-saying. very applicable to any person one wants to brush off in a nice way. sorry, it´s me, not you. sorry for being harsh here; but i feel she shook you off and is now feeling lighter. cut your losses! the sooner the better.

Posted by Yodi

Posted by NemDeux

Posted by Yodi

Posted by NemDeux
imo and in this order from most to least ...

scorpio
pisces
cancer

with age there comes a shift.

I agree.

in addition i think the motivations of each sign differ when it comes down to sensitivities.

Tru.. also how each sign expresses it.

Out of the three I believe crabs hides it better

click to expand

out of the water sign siblings ....i´d say cancer seems like the brother from another mother.
a tick more realistic and down to earth ...maybe it´s the cardinal energy.

Posted by Yodi

Posted by NemDeux
imo and in this order from most to least ...

scorpio
pisces
cancer

with age there comes a shift.

I agree.

click to expand

in addition i think the motivations of each sign differ when it comes down to sensitivities.

whatever truman capote´s placements were.

other than that; i´d say earth and air venus.

imo and in this order from most to least ...

scorpio
pisces
cancer

with age there comes a shift.