Not sure that would make a difference as I have fair-skin and cant tan. Im not fat, I have a slender frame. I've been lucky to attract pretty girls who dont need beefcake for them to be attracted.
I agree most women my age would be brutal and next me quick. That is why my v card status will remain a secret. Not all women are, but there is a still a bunch who are judgmental and would panic I would turn into a stage five clinger because we knocked boots.
Which is bs because I need a mental connection to fall in love. I may like someone a little more if the sex is good. But love? nah..
Trust me I am back on the bike but dating is hard when everyone uses dating apps and think if you approach in a friendly way, you are going to kill them.
Cant do dating apps as I take horrible pics due to my fair skin. Camera is not my friend at all.
Im focused on leaving here in late april to improve my dating odds by going somewhere else. its not the only reason Im leaving to reassure you.
Im stuck in a job I hate and cant leave due to the job market not being good where I live.
Am saving money and unless a miracle happens by late april will split town.
Even if I do find another job the dating situation has to get better if it does not then I will definitely leave
First off, I wanted to make something clear, I would never tell a woman my virgin status. Size status, yes potentially. But not the V-Card one.
If you want a non christian type girl thinking you are some sort of sociopath, telling her you are a 40 year old virgin will definitely do the trick. I know how to scam off my lack of experience by just telling her that its been years since Ive been physically intimate with a woman so I may be rusty. That is the best way to go I think.
Looking at the size of the vagina via oral can help me see if there is a chance she would be open to my size. If its big, give her a happy ending with the tongue. Then cut it off saying it wont work because I'm a virgin. That should guarantee me getting nexted. If that doesnt work for me just tell her Im packing a flintstones di-k 2 inches long and growing. She'll be outta there faster than Sonic the hedgehog.
I went out this weekend and pretty much wont go out at night to meet women again unless I am at a social gathering. Too degrading and makes me feel like an idiot
I think I am going to relocate to Vegas or Florida just based from what I've heard about if a girl likes you she is a little more direct in her signals or verbal Plus there are more early 30 somethings there. In my experience 30 somethings play less games when it comes to dating unlike 20 somethings.
At this point if I even lose my virginity that works for me if I end up having bad luck with dating from then on. I dont need a relationship to make me happy. Im fine by myself
I smiled and was friendly in my tone and demeanor. I left when I got the signal she wasnt into it
There was nothing else I could have done differently To be clear, I am not saying my approach doesnt need work there is always room for improvement. But anyone else seeing it could see I was being friendly and social. T
And walked away when she hinted she didnt really want to talk. This girl was high leveling scamming. Because she changed her tone of voice completely and exagerrated when saying that im "creepy" stuff to the friend.
Some girls in my city will pull that move to get personal validation and attention as well from their friends. Cause I told this story to a friend who lives here too.
He had the same thing happen to him. Quick facts - Ive seen him flirt with women before and be successful. He is good looking, friendly and has more of an outgoing personality than me.
But in that instance he was just helping a girl who tripped and dropped a bunch of her stuff which included papers. Not hitting on her.
She said "no i've got it" in a very dismissive rude tone of voice. He wrote it off as her having a bad day. Then after he told me this a few weeks late he went to a mutual female friend of ours social gathering. She saw him and within minutes started telling our female friend a different story saying he was trying to get with her.
This girl wasnt even his type (he likes redheads she's a blonde) even our female friend knew she was lying and jokingly called her out on it
To reaffirm, I know not all women do this, but the problem is that you never know when approaching if you have a mature or immature person to deal with. The risk is too high on a social level
I hate approaching in bars and clubs, but at least it is expected and you wont be run out of town for doing it unlike in the daytime where I live.
I am starting to wonder if I should move to somewhere like Brazil or Ireland where women are friendly and dont mind approaching or actively approach instead of the games.
I do want to express my thanks for your suggestions and helpfulness. I do appreciate that and dont want that to get lost in translation.
As far as approaching, its not about "confidence" its called I dont want to go to jail. You have to be very careful with cold approaching women in this day and age even if it is done in a respectful way.
When you are approaching women, you run the risk of them getting the police on you, or shaming you to other people when you leave.
Even if you take a hint and walk away. I remember one time I approached a girl who I thought may be interested very friendly but quickly picked up through tone and body language that she wasnt.
I respectfully ejected myself from the conversation and wished her a good day. As I am walking away I then hear her say to someone she had this "creepy" guy approach her
To rewind I was friendly and smiled kept the conversation banal that was it And I ejected from her when I caught hint of disinterest.
But to her still I was somehow "creepy" Womens words carry power and can travel fast as everyone can somehow know each other in social circles. Basically the next girl you approach could be a friend of the girl who rejected you in the first place.
I stopped approaching during the day after that. Too much of a risk in getting creep shamed. Im not opposed to approaching during the day provided the girl is super direct with her interest.
Addressing an earlier point you made of going on a dating app and annoucing my v-card
Again while your suggestion is well-intentioned, realistically it comes off creepy and serial killerish to most women due to my age.
Most women will be scared off due to my status at my age thinking I may be the long lost son of Buffalo Bill. Or think it is fake like others on here.
Also I dont take good pictures either I look bad in pictures but better in person
My only hope now is going out at night to the bars as an approach may be rejected but is expected. I hate approaching in bars as it is so degrading.
I am actually going out tonight to see if I actually have a girl approach for once given the day it is today. Probably not. And I will have to gauge interest.
All my friends are spending today with their girlfriends or boyfriends. So I will be lone wolfing it tonight. Not sure if that is a good idea because a guy by himself at a bar can give off a serial killer vibe
Ironically all the girls Ive dated either approached me or I met through friends. But in the last couple of years I've only been approached 6 different times by women. Cold approaching has never worked ever for me. But I dont have a choice given that the girls that live here are more reserved
We'll see what happens but I'll probably go home to lesbian porn more than likely
Sorry if this is a double post but my original post wasnt showing on website for some reason -
I have a unusual reason of why I am still a virgin at 40 years old. I have been on dates gotten as far as kissing and fingering.
Almost was even in a committed relationship without sleeping with the girl.
So, heres what happened with that girl This was back in my 20's. We were about to get intimate for the first time but as soon as she saw my neither regions it was downhill from there. All of a sudden her mood changed and told me she had to bounce.
For a few days I heard nothing from her and assumed I got ghosted. Then I got an apologetic email from her explaining she couldnt date me as I was too small for her. Which was obvious from when she looked at it. And she cant be in a relationship with someone that has that kind of size.
It was brutal but honest which I respected. After that I measured my size when erect and it was 5 inches barely.
I got interest from other girls but would panic when we would get intimate and break it off. Assuming they would with me when seeing it. Fretting over my size pretty much screwed up dating to where I stopped and assumed I was going to be alone forever due to my size.
For whatever misguided reason I've decided to try dating again, but I am very anxious. I feel like now if I get physically intimate with a girl I need to do a confessional regarding my size a head of time.
Is that too awkward to do even if you already kissed? I am really reluctant to get what remaining self esteem I have ripped to shreds.
I am getting interest from attractive younger women but have been reluctant to seal the deal for getting a date
I dont want to end up being a subject of a joke like Ali Wong did about a guy she dated who was smaller.
Im starting to wonder if using an escort who wont judge me and just be resolved to a life of no dating is the best way to go.