taurus sun cap moon aries venus/mercury pisces mars

or perhaps you need to get out and get some exercise to burn off all that stress

do that first, then try to relax
- I lay/sleep on the beach and listen to the waves until I can breathe again
wow, so sorry -
Posted by 2Moon
Posted by tiziani
Posted by 2Moon
Wait, this is in personal development.

First time I'm seeing this place...

There are like secret boards on dxp? I can't find this place on main page


Maybe you're on mobile? Some of them don't show in the main listing


Oh.. 😱😱😱 😨

Yes mobile...
click to expand


I'm not on mobile and I'm not seeing it - strange ...
Posted by RooSagicorn
Posted by tctao
Posted by RooSagicorn
Posted by tctao


This is pretty how I've gotten the best results on a day-to-day so far.

Take care of myself first so that people I care for naturally benefit as a result.



Yes I learned it the hard way. I used to think if you’re kind and good to others, they will do the same for you. It is not true. So I had two choices - be miserable, bitter and hate everyone or two continue to be myself and take care of me first. The rest is a balance & how to find that middle ground where it works where you are treated well & treat others well. In all ways in life. I chose #2 which meant work on me first. Responsibility for me, no blame on others and taking steps to get there it does make a difference.



true - do you think the hard way is the only way to learn that - I mean how else does one learn things unless they have truly experienced them




Probably yes. It is difficult to understand unless you’ve truly been there. I wish it hadn’t taken 2 marriages and 20 years with one to figure it out. But it is what it is. Now & the rest of life is what is important, so I forgive myself for taking so long.


yes, I agree - sometimes it takes a long time to find our balance but we have to forgive ourselves because there really isn't anything to forgive - try to remember that it is all part of the journey - there is no end goal - there is no point in time that we finally make it and know everything - continue to learn by experience, education, etc. or else the optimism is gone - I call it hope








Yes I agree. Well I guess the truth is I lost hope for a long time and just survived. Then one day I had a wake-up call and I could no longer just survive. Hope returned cuz the alternative was unacceptable, and I needed a reason to truly live. So the journey and faith in it brings about that reason. Yes it is hope.
click to expand


yes, there are periods in our journey where all we can do is "survive" - and I think that is what the piece was saying that @tiziani posted ... like the prisons and awful conditions - and some of us do die in those dark and lonely god forsaken places - and some not even because they lost hope but that the physical body gives out - but for those who live ......


Posted by RooSagicorn
Posted by tctao


This is pretty how I've gotten the best results on a day-to-day so far.

Take care of myself first so that people I care for naturally benefit as a result.



Yes I learned it the hard way. I used to think if you’re kind and good to others, they will do the same for you. It is not true. So I had two choices - be miserable, bitter and hate everyone or two continue to be myself and take care of me first. The rest is a balance & how to find that middle ground where it works where you are treated well & treat others well. In all ways in life. I chose #2 which meant work on me first. Responsibility for me, no blame on others and taking steps to get there it does make a difference.



true - do you think the hard way is the only way to learn that - I mean how else does one learn things unless they have truly experienced them




Probably yes. It is difficult to understand unless you’ve truly been there. I wish it hadn’t taken 2 marriages and 20 years with one to figure it out. But it is what it is. Now & the rest of life is what is important, so I forgive myself for taking so long.
click to expand


yes, I agree - sometimes it takes a long time to find our balance but we have to forgive ourselves because there really isn't anything to forgive - try to remember that it is all part of the journey - there is no end goal - there is no point in time that we finally make it and know everything - continue to learn by experience, education, etc. or else the optimism is gone - I call it hope








This is pretty how I've gotten the best results on a day-to-day so far.

Take care of myself first so that people I care for naturally benefit as a result.



Yes I learned it the hard way. I used to think if you’re kind and good to others, they will do the same for you. It is not true. So I had two choices - be miserable, bitter and hate everyone or two continue to be myself and take care of me first. The rest is a balance & how to find that middle ground where it works where you are treated well & treat others well. In all ways in life. I chose #2 which meant work on me first. Responsibility for me, no blame on others and taking steps to get there it does make a difference.



true - do you think the hard way is the only way to learn that - I mean how else does one learn things unless they have truly experienced them


Posted by tiziani
Posted by tctao

"Of course, honestly stating what you want isn't what makes you an marker -- it's how you act when you don't get it."

Yes I get that part but -

"In fact, forever concealing what you want just so you can feel like you've made a noble sacrifice (one the other person doesn't even know you're making) is kind of the biggest dick move of all."

hmmmm - right - it doesn't work that way because then resentment will build - and the other person not knowing what sacrifices you are making when you do make them is also a dick in my book - we are all connected and/or most are - if you are not, you would surely fall into this category of not being empathic to another's wants and needs and noble sacrifices if everything is about you

I prefer a compromise as in we can do stuff that I want and stuff that you want - or at least we will go our separate ways and climb our own mountains and then be able to talk about our experiences and what we've learned and share that way - it all keeps us both open, happy and feeling nurtured




Should someone be in tune with what another person is sacrificing for them even if they've only know each other for a few hours? Or are you talking about established relationships when it comes to being empathetic?

oh - yes - I was thinking more of an established relationship

I took the text as saying making the noble sacrifice is a dick move because there's the easier option of just straightforward making it clear what we want and not holding the relationship back that way.

oh absolutely - we all have our boundaries - and then there places where the ship can slip into the harbor disguised as one of us until it is seen for what it is and is banished into the night

click to expand






Posted by Ixion
Frankly, martial thinking is what keeps me most whole though others see it as cold and unfeeling, or defeatist.

I consider myself an optimist in the same paradigm as Stockdale... lol it doesn't win you the most popularity contests taking this kind of viewpoint.

It can be stark, it can be cold, and hard...but it doesn't leave you lost or confused in where you stand in relation to your goals or desired outcomes...and it accepts that hard work (sometimes soul-crushingly hard work) is necessary to suffer through to get there.



absolutely




"Of course, honestly stating what you want isn't what makes you an marker -- it's how you act when you don't get it."

Yes I get that part but -

"In fact, forever concealing what you want just so you can feel like you've made a noble sacrifice (one the other person doesn't even know you're making) is kind of the biggest dick move of all."

hmmmm - right - it doesn't work that way because then resentment will build - and the other person not knowing what sacrifices you are making when you do make them is also a dick in my book - we are all connected and/or most are - if you are not, you would surely fall into this category of not being empathic to another's wants and needs and noble sacrifices if everything is about you

I prefer a compromise as in we can do stuff that I want and stuff that you want - or at least we will go our separate ways and climb our own mountains and then be able to talk about our experiences and what we've learned and share that way - it all keeps us both open, happy and feeling nurtured

Posted by tiziani
Most people (or at least, most pessimists) seem to misunderstand what optimism is. It's not about obliviously ignoring the reality, like in that old Bobby McFerrin song in which a wealthy musician tells the homeless not to worry about being destitute ...

Instead, it's accepting the horrible reality and knowing you can get through it if you keep pressing on.


This is what some call the Stockdale paradox, named after a Vietnam POW and torture victim who found that the "optimistic" captives broke first -- or rather, the ones who thought optimism was another word for lying to yourself:

"They were the ones who said, 'We're going to be out by Christmas.' And Christmas would come, and Christmas would go. Then they'd say, 'We're going to be out by Easter.' And Easter would come, and Easter would go. And then Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again. And they died of a broken heart."

It's true that it was probably less a broken heart that killed them and more the Viet Cong and/or malaria, but you get the point.

Stockdale's coping method was to accept that their situation was unimaginably butterty, while also holding onto the knowledge that it is absolutely possible to survive such things.

http://www.cracked.com/article_21744_6-ways-your-brain-programmed-to-keep-you-unhappy.html


#shipped


hope he's ok
that lady on the bottom is so funny - used to watch her show and howl !
lol no, it was a band from years ago that sang the song about the dawning of the age of Aquarius and that peace would rule the planet and that love would rule the stars - it's only my dream wish lol - maybe the war will finally bring peace to all   Read more
I guess they were popular then to have sold out - any chance of getting them elsewhere online ?
Posted by LooksmaxCamp
Posted by tctao
Posted by LooksmaxCamp
Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
Posted by LooksmaxCamp
Posted by CaramelizedCoffee
The yellow would look horrible on your skin tone if you want to wear shorts


Does it?

I wear yellow a lot


Oh ok never mind then


I think I wear the same tone of yellow though

Mustard would rook horrible


you are correct - there are 2 tones of yellow - those with red undertones which go with summer and spring color skin - and those with blue undertones which fair better with fall and winter skin tones - I look better in the blue undertone yellows

#colormaxing



I am a winter

Pale force and dark hair
click to expand


I am a winter too - I have olive tone to my skin color

what size ? lol