He is mad at me..........Cancer man let me have it

8/12/2011 4:24:28 PM | More
Leo1970

LOL

Some of you are familiar with me and Mr. Cancer's dysfunctional romance. Due to the distance and other factors our romance has gotten a little cold on my side but he's always rearing to make plans to see me. We would make plans and I would cancel. Looking back over my behavior for the past 2-3 months, I realize that I allowed my insecurities/fears from our previous encounter make me pull back. So in a sense, I've been pushing him away but wanting to keep him close enough. Sounds crazy I know. I'll call just to see if he'd respond and he always do. If I call he answers, if I text, he responds within 2 minutes. So I know he's there, but I can't get past that point.

In July, I called him and we had our usual love fest conversation. Prior to this conversation, he hasn't been as emotional or open about his feelings for me. He's been guarded, but I expected that because I've been the same way. During this conversation he tells me that he's been dreaming of me almost every night that week and he "needed to see me desperately." I asked what the contents of the dreams were and he stated that in one dream, he reached out to hold me and I vanished. He stated that the dream really bothered him. He just continued to ask to see me and I agreed to maybe meeting up that Friday. He was pretty happy with that. Well that Wednesday, I get a text from him saying that he's so excited to see me and if we were still on for that Friday. I didn't respond. Yep, the fear set in again. So he text again on Thursday, "hello, are you there?" I didn't respond. Then that Friday, he called me over and over and over. My heart hurts as I type this....but I didn't respond. I just couldn't face telling him again, I couldn't make it....

He finally stopped calling. I haven't heard from him since July 6. Well yesterday I decided to call to see how he's doing and he let me have it. I didn't expect him to be so emotional because most men aren't. Usually, they've moved on without a second thought.

Me: Hi Cl...Just saying hello
Him: Where the hell have you been?
Me: Just really busy, how are you....
Him: Bullbutter, I called you over and over again but you don't answer. I made arrangements to meet you and you don't show up. I called 3 days straight.

I didn't have any excuse, so I just apologized. He went on and on about how pissed he was and I took it because I deserved it. I apologized over and over....next thing he asked was

"So When do you want to see m
8/12/2011 4:27:16 PM | More
Leo1970

Him: So when do you want to see me?
Me: Right now! (joke)
Him: Don't joke, for real, WHEN DO YOU WANT TO SEE ME????
Me: Damn, next Friday...
Him: The Winery 7p.m.
Me: Yes sir...smile....

That's what gets me everytime. I thought he'd tell me to never call, treetrunk off or something, but he says when do I want to see him. That line just makes me want to rip his clothes off and do bad bad things to his gorgeous body. That turns me the hell on...lol Love it when a man doesn't take my crap...

Obviously, this man is still very interested in me after all this time. Yes, I admit, there's some leo game playing here but I'm honestly very scared of things getting out of control like last time and Mr. Cancer pulling away. I'm very afraid to get as involved as I was before. I went through pure hell over the holidays. How do I get past this and move forward with this relationship.
8/12/2011 6:12:35 PM | More
Leo1970

Posted by PurrrrHissss
Posted by Leo1970
How do I get past this and move forward with this relationship.


Well, you can start by not blowing him off this time.


Ey, stop telling me the truth....okay. ROFL
8/12/2011 6:13:34 PM | More
Leo1970

Posted by PurrrrHissss
Posted by Leo1970
How do I get past this and move forward with this relationship.


Well, you can start by not blowing him off this time.


Actually, when I first read your post, I thought you said to "blow him off." ROFL He'd love that...
8/12/2011 6:19:50 PM | More
westside

21 years old male from AMERICA!  

thug lYfe.

Posted by Leo1970




Well that Wednesday, I get a text from him saying that he's so excited to see me and if we were still on for that Friday. I didn't respond. Yep, the fear set in again. So he text again on Thursday, "hello, are you there?" I didn't respond. Then that Friday, he called me over and over and over. My heart hurts as I type this....but I didn't respond. I just couldn't face telling him again, I couldn't make it....

Image and video hosting by TinyPic
8/12/2011 6:21:16 PM | More
Leo1970

Posted by wineaux
^^have you told him ANY of this?? he's not going to right out tell you out of fear and vice versa. i know you can do it. remember, they never show all of their cards because they are so guarded and terrified of rejection.

i'm glad he was so direct with you about you falling out of the picture for awhile, but you need to remind him that he did the same. an eye for an eye doesn't work for them.

it took me a while to get on a wavelength with my crabbie but the longer i spent time with him, the more i could feel what he was feeling. i would just ask but in a very sweet & coy way as to not scare him by using leading questions like: 'are you scared sometimes?' and as intuitive as they are he should know exactly what you're talking about...and i estimate he'll probably answer 'yes, aren't you?' he wants validation and you want communication.

i know you live far from one another but you CAN make it work as long as you're on the same page. you just need one night of communication to see where you two are. perhaps on friday it'll happen! btw, PM me on what winery he works at




No, I haven't told him how i felt. We've only seen each other once since April. He's been trying to spend time with me, but I keep pushing him back. Yep, I'm doing exactly what he did to me but unintentionally. I didn't even think he cared until after his little tantrum yesterday. It has been over a month and I just assumed he had moved on wouldn't even respond to my text. Well he did and let me have it. I'm not used to him talking to me like that. LOL He's usually so quiet and sweet. ROFL Ouch!!!! Now I want to hurt him in a good way of course........I LIKE IT!!!!

8/12/2011 6:23:07 PM | More
Leo1970

Posted by westside
Posted by Leo1970




Well that Wednesday, I get a text from him saying that he's so excited to see me and if we were still on for that Friday. I didn't respond. Yep, the fear set in again. So he text again on Thursday, "hello, are you there?" I didn't respond. Then that Friday, he called me over and over and over. My heart hurts as I type this....but I didn't respond. I just couldn't face telling him again, I couldn't make it....

Image and video hosting by TinyPic


I was skeered....I know, I suck, but that's why I'm talking about it now. I promise to not do it again. I will see him next Friday and trust me, I'll make it up to him....
8/12/2011 6:27:10 PM | More
Leo1970

Posted by moongirljj
Are you sure you are really even that in to him? You can imagine why he would wonder!


That's the thing, I'm crazy about him. You would have to know our history to completely understand why I feel the way I do. However, obviously the guy is very interested, so I need to get my butter together.

Just a little background. Last year me and MR. Cancer were hot and heavy. He fell in love, so he says, and began to push me away. I panicked, became needy, pushy, desperate which made him pull away more rather than give him space. He came back after 2 weeks but I began to pull away out of fear/anger, etc. Needless to say, we've been at a halt ever since. Currently, he's been pursuing me, but I've kept him at a distance, so now he's beginning to become very agitated.
8/13/2011 11:17:03 AM | More
Leo1970

Posted by wineaux
^^have you told him ANY of this?? he's not going to right out tell you out of fear and vice versa. i know you can do it. remember, they never show all of their cards because they are so guarded and terrified of rejection.

i'm glad he was so direct with you about you falling out of the picture for awhile, but you need to remind him that he did the same. an eye for an eye doesn't work for them.

it took me a while to get on a wavelength with my crabbie but the longer i spent time with him, the more i could feel what he was feeling. i would just ask but in a very sweet & coy way as to not scare him by using leading questions like: 'are you scared sometimes?' and as intuitive as they are he should know exactly what you're talking about...and i estimate he'll probably answer 'yes, aren't you?' he wants validation and you want communication.

i know you live far from one another but you CAN make it work as long as you're on the same page. you just need one night of communication to see where you two are. perhaps on friday it'll happen! btw, PM me on what winery he works at




I'll definitely try an address the issue, just not sure it will happen on Friday. Considering it's been ages since we've seen one another, that won't be the first thing on my mind. LOL I want to keep the date fun and lite. Ultimately, I'll follow his lead. I don't wanna talk...just ravage him. I wish I'd agreed to this weekend. Shoot!!!!
8/13/2011 4:32:58 PM | More
Applecoma

31 years old

I'm sick but I just think the whole situation is actually quite cute. Right down to the conversation.
One big AWWW. Good luck.
8/13/2011 5:40:11 PM | More
pr_princess

Have you ever told him how you feel, last year? Have you been intimate? I just sent my Cancer off to run free and wild. Deleted him from everything I had. I don't know how girls make it with Cancers!!!

8/13/2011 6:39:09 PM | More
Sarinka_Moon

female from CA  

Cancer woman...don't believe the hype...

Who does that?! Seriously WTF!

If someone did that butter to me, they would be deleted immediately with no explanation! I wouldn't even bother to "cuss someone out" either. treetrunk it and treetrunk them and I'd keep it pushin'!

IMO if you were REALLY feeling this guy, you wouldn't blow him off/ stand him up/ dodge him/ play games/ etc. You would be all up in his butter and he all up in your butter as well. If you're scared you shouldn't be making/ breaking plans with the dude so he can be with someone who IS ready to spend time with him etc.

I don't know the entire situation, but all I know is if you're not ready...let him go. It's only fair.
8/13/2011 6:51:21 PM | More
pr_princess

lol yes I did. HE was playing too many games. He told me he'd see me "soon" about 4 times in a row, not once did it happen. He'd cancel. But continue to text. Called me once because I pretty much told him I had enough of his butter. But I for was busy so he said he'd call back next day. Never did. So I said to him. "thanks for the call... and pretty much said I'm done. He still managed to text me.. with any ending of "... but.." probably wanting me to answer his text. Instead I didn't and deleted him from FB and phone. I told him, he's had plenty of chances to see me. HE chose not to. He has plans to go out for dinner with other people, go to events in the city with other people... I haven't seen him in 6 weeks.... How much more time do I have to waste? I told him how I feel... no response. So I told him politely to ef off. Politely. I don't have patience but have been very patient with him. He has made no notable interest toward me just played his games right. So enough is enough. I have a date on Thursday. And he helped me make that decision very easily. He had a choice, he chose to not be with me, not talk to me, not call me, not see me. HIS choice.

You can contact the admins directly by clicking here if there is a matter that needs more immediate attention.