What is this test I heaar cancer guys do?
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|I've seen posts with "I must have passed the test," and even Hightide has said "he might be testing you"|
What is the test in the beginning? And what are some of the ways they can test us girls.... and WHY with the testing? What exactly might they be testing for?
Posted by ilove2dream
Thanks for answering... was beginning to think I was shouting into cyber space with not even an echo... lol... jeez: tough crowd! and "Hrmmm..." to your answer! I was about to change my tactics... I will ponder on this for a while.
Unless some cancer boys care to enlighten us!!! Come on!!! Spill the beans brothers!
Posted by ilove2dream
First, We come off as sweet and loving to draw you in. Also we like to rock your world in the bedroom as an incentive to keep getting to know us.
Then we begin the emotional tricks to see how you will react in a various amount of situations. If you don't eventually show your most vulnerable side to us, the one you don't show other people, then we will just toy with you until you figure it out what we want. As gross as this sounds, you literally have to be willing to take an actual butter on a Cancer man if he asks you to or at least be open to it down the line.We get off at you doing things you wouldn't do for other people and only for us. We like the secrets just between the two of us. We feel it brings us closer together and builds a trusting bond in that we can both show each other our best and worst sides and not be embarrassed. Once the woman figures this out, she might feel liberated that she can let it all hang out in front of a Cancer Man.
Finally,once you have past the tests, we begin to act like our normal true selves and start to do anything for you to show our love and the emotional drama will be cut to a bare minimum. You will get out absolute best side for a long time unless u start trying to pay us back for the game we played, which were just to make sure you really wanted to be with us at our best and worst. You can't hold resentment for the games we played or it would have been all in vain the trouble you went through.
|I think you basically nailed it when you said.....|
I get it tho, since they can be moody, they need to know your not going to freak out when they have their ups and doowns and if they can ever completely relax around you. And since they need solitude from time to time they need to know you will still be there when they get back.
The Cancer man wants a woman to be able to see us at our worst emotionally and not end up scaring them and yet still somehow understand where we are coming from in all this. We also want to see your darkest side- through our petty games- so ours doesn't scare you. We like having it over your head in case you question our dark side. We also basically want to see the best and worst a person is capable of so we don't end up emotionally devastated down the line if it doesn't work out. We can say "Well this person showed they do this type of stuff, its my fault for ever getting involved".
Basically in all this, a Cancer man doesn't want to be embarrassed. So he has to pull these little games to gauge potential reactions a person might have in certain situations. Cancer men will frame alot of hypothetical statements to see how you treated you ex, if your a prude or not, if your a drama queen for no real reason, how you react to certain statements. The potentials are endless in what we will say, and this depends on the individual personality of the Cancer man and what traits he holds the highest in his mind.
and also you can't give us a politically correct answer to everything. We have to know what "you" personally think about something.Even if we just met you 2 hours ago.It may seem vulgar at times, but if we feel you can give honest answer on tricky things, then we know you will tell the truth on the small things.
This is kinda crude, but this is an example of how far we hard hitting we can be to get to the bottom of something. We are all grown ups here
Do you like a man to lick your butt during sex.....
Do not say....
That is totally gross, I can't believe you would even ask me that. I am a lady!. That is a totally PC answer in our eyes and it embarrasses us. Normally we won't ask type of question in front of other people and if someone does, then that answer is totally fine.You can also give that answer to other people or family members.
If you don't like it and if we are talking alone, then say.....
Its not really my cup of tea, Never tried it as it seems sorta seems a little invasive to me, but I might be down for it if I trusted the person enough. You gotta show your open minded to stuff you might not like right now. You can be against something but you gotta show you can answer any type of question to us
If your a good sport and actually like it use a humor angle about it.....
That is the first thing I like when my pants are off and I am in doggy style!
|This explains why my Taurus guy who has Cancer moon and Cancer venus drives me nuts with talking all around an issue and coming up with strange questions and expecting me to answer what I would do in this situation or that. He doesn't see it as mindgames and I understand that he wants to feel secure with me as the woman in his life, which is hardest to do because he isn't secure in himself yet. He has many moods and sometimes I want to tell him to take a hike when some things he says are downright rude. I don't accept crankiness or being picked on so he has to show respect. He loves to tease and sometimes it is hard to tell when he is serious or not. I know he is searching for someone who believes in him and someone he can believe in too who will be there no matter what. |
It takes a lot of patience to be with Cancer guy and you would never know he has any insecurities. Sometimes he wants to be alone, needs it, and sometimes he wants to be close to you, just to hear your voice and know you are part of his life. If he is around, he is interested. I think the best way to deal with his moods and his questions is to hold your ground, be honest and open even if you have to bite your tongue, be consistent and hold him accountable. If he driving you crazy, react but don't overreact. Don't think confrontation but rather remember to keep your tone steady and tell him he is accountable for what he says and does and if he wants you in his life so he has to prove it by respecting you.
If you can bend rather than break when he pushes and if you can stand it when you feel he is distant sometimes, remember he overthinks everything and he has a lot of emotion he is afraid to show sometimes because he is easily hurt. He will find more confidence in showing who he really is when he is ready and only then will you really see what he has in mind for you. He doesn't want to be burned or waste his time with someone who is not of quality. Be confident in yourself and he will learn to trust what his heart and head tell him. He is a romantic too but he might not let you know that till he has made up his mind about you. The more he he feels he can trust all his senses and that you will not change, the more he will let you in.
|he doesn't say crazy stuff|
but he does disappear
and then get kindof suspicious and snappy with me...
he's been retreating and then poking in every once in a while for the past couple of months after a big fight we had
|In other words, we're not looking for a girlfriend, partner, woman, lady, wife, etc, but out soul mate. That female has to be like us, and that's why we always have a hard time finding that especial person.|
Posted by missscorps
I mean a challenge is exciting but, chileeeee lol!
Posted by HighTide
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