Stubborn Capricorn Silence

aquapiscescusp
But why? What purpose does silence offer when something bothers you? The slightest little thing can bring up this wall of silence and then you are left trying to figure out why the silence (and you have many days of deafening silence to think about what you might have done wrong) to then narrow it down to that a possible moment that you think might have upset him. To realize how trivial it was, if indeed it was that particular thing or moment, because you still don't know, but now so much time has passed... and he is back without one mention of it. Almost like a silent punishment. It's like walking on egg shells, you just never know what could set it off. Is it just me??
aquapiscescusp
That is so not true about aqua. We are different and feel different from everyone. I do have a hard time understanding silence. Everyone knows (astrology aside) that silence never brings anything good between 2 people. I did not do anything, maybe I did not pick the phone that one time he called, it could be that simple, it is a re-occuring theme with him.
lildol
You indicated that "the slightest little thing" brings it on, but then in the same breath you indicate that you are "left trying to figure out why" or what it was you did. So, are you sure you're just not reading into things? Maybe it has nothing to do with you, or anything you did, and you shouldn't take it personal. We have a tendency to live in our heads and easily get wrapped up in our own world.
BeoWulf

Y'know, if anyone can know the value of silence, it's either an Aqua or a Capricorn. C'mon, when it comes to silence, Caps & Aquas are tied. Both of you know that it's better to bite your tongue than to say the wrong thing.....esp during a disagreement.

The solution may be a written letter asking him what is wrong & how do you BOTH solve it. Explain clearly that whatever is bothering him, you are willing to work with him to overcome it.( DON'T use a cellphone text or an e-mail....when it comes to goatfish, old fashioned letters are best)

truecap
Unless I'm reading this wrong, Just ask him "is everything okay?". It may not be you. Might be something else like his job, his family, etc that has him worried and deep in thought. We internalize and toss things around in our mind until we have a solution. If he says "yes, everythings ok, why?" just say "I've been feeling a distance recently and wanted to make sure you are okay". Don't mention what he's doing or that he's been silent, focus on how it makes you feel. Don't push the issue, let it go. See how it goes. He might make an effort so you don't feel the distance anymore.

Don't know your situation....
truecap
Question: Why do you automatically assume its you or something you did?

Unless you're not telling us everything.
aquapiscescusp
lol ES

Anyway, it's not meee it's him, he is so sensitive. I had to postpone meeting up with him and the next time I saw him he was a little cold, you could tell the way he is different. Sulking. Big baby. Has to make you pay for him feeling bad... really not sure. These silences always coincide with him not getting his way. The most he has gone silent is 4 weeks. When you confront him on it, it makes it worse, like he can't admit the reason, because it is usually so stupid, no wonder. I have to laugh or else I am going to cryyyyy.....
lnana04
if its 4weeks, and you had to contact him, the BIG picture is that he can take or leave you and is willing to allow you to do the same with him. this may not be a relationship hes willing to fight for. its basically his way or nothing at all. hes very sensitive and difficult and not afraid to show he can be all those things alone. flip it. let him contact you, and if he doesnt then move on.
aquapiscescusp
I did not contact him after those 4 weeks, he just happened to bump into me and we talked, I asked him why he fell of the face of the earth and you know what his reply was?? Why did you not contact me? That is what I am dealing with. I never, ever contact him when he goes silent. Some ego trip?
aquapiscescusp
the psycho one? lol

how was he psycho DG??
aquapiscescusp
what is the longest you have gone WW? and why? and what are you trying to achieve with the silence...
aquapiscescusp
I mean if you care about the person, what is the purpose of the silence? it is painful to be on the receiving end of that...
aquapiscescusp
Stealthy, that's a good word to describe Caps
brianafay
God I hate when they ice you out.

I don't think I ever cared as much when anyone of another sign decided to pull the silent treatment on me as I did when a Cap did it.
brianafay
If you can try to find comfort in the fact that they think they are giving you what you want, it makes it easier to deal with.

*shrugs*
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