Do Aries have problems letting go???

My Aries girlfriend is driving me nuts!! Her boyfriend cheated on her back in May and that was that. But, she constantly talks about him, looking on his cousin's FB to see if he is in any family event photos, wondering if he still is dating the same woman, etc., etc. She has an urge to drive by his house despite it being out of the way and seems to struggle with fighting that erge to the extent that she will not even drive on the main road that leads to his house even if it is at a point on that particular road that is still 30 minutes from his house. It's the 3rd time we know of that he's cheated so it's not that she is interested in having him back... she's just obsessed with knowing what is going on in his life.

Similarly, she met a guy on a dating website back in July and they saw each other for about a month and a half at which point he decided the distance was too far and he had too much going on in his life with work and his kids. His profile is not active. But, she logs onto the site almost daily to see if 1) has he activated his profile and 2) when was the last time he was on (as it does indicate that because he is in her favorites despite his profile not being active). I get to hear about it, she'll call me up and ask if I can guess who was on that site within the past hour.

So, is this problem with 'letting go' normal Aries behavior?

She's interested in and dating other men too. I just don't get it!

How do I tell my girlfriend she is obsessing (she does admit she's a little OCD) and that she needs to move on without making her feel like I think she's crazy or hurting her feelings???

effedupgirl

9/25/2009 5:18:13 PM | IP

38 years old female

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she knows it's crazy. you don't have to tell her. she'll only move on when she finds someone to "replace the dogs that bit her". i'm an aries. and from my point of view..it's normal behavior. we can be a little stalkerish... but only if he ended the relationship and we weren't ready for that to happen. we need for all of our exes to want us back...even if we don't want them back. and if she's like me and you do end up telling her that she's acting like a fool...she'll laugh about it...cause she knows it's the truth, but she can't help it!

xtina

9/27/2009 4:31:11 PM | IP

22 years old female from California

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Lol this is not just an "Aries" trait. I've known so many woman like this, none of them Aries.

ramfishtwins

9/28/2009 2:21:01 PM | IP

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Posted by effedupgirl
she knows it's crazy. you don't have to tell her. she'll only move on when she finds someone to "replace the dogs that bit her". i'm an aries. and from my point of view..it's normal behavior. we can be a little stalkerish... but only if he ended the relationship and we weren't ready for that to happen. we need for all of our exes to want us back...even if we don't want them back. and if she's like me and you do end up telling her that she's acting like a fool...she'll laugh about it...cause she knows it's the truth, but she can't help it!

Effed up is correct. You don't need to tell her cause she's already aware. She's also right about the need for our exes to want us. Kind of sick (I know), but we like that feeling even if we want nothing to do with them.
She will get over it in time and once she is, she is.

Hypno

10/5/2009 4:33:39 AM | IP

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If you are able to live like that then do nothing, but if you are not, then clearly you have to show her that she is dosrespecting you by doing such things..so she has to stop doing that or you gonna leave her.
it's win/win for you both ways..

lildol

10/5/2009 5:49:47 PM | IP

female from the abyss of confusion

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Posted by Hypno
If you are able to live like that then do nothing, but if you are not, then clearly you have to show her that she is dosrespecting you by doing such things..so she has to stop doing that or you gonna leave her.
it's win/win for you both ways..

She's not THAT kind of girlfriend LOL

cancer12

10/6/2009 9:47:30 AM | IP

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From personal experience with an Aries ex:

I'm cancer and he's aries. It was long distance. We broke up once before in 2008 for 6 months I think and he never stopped calling until we got back together. Then we broke up again in February 2009 and I even change my cell but he kept calling my house. He'd stop calling for a month or two then start calling my house again. I'm not sure if it's an aries thing or if this guy truely wants tobe with me. It's almost pushy and needy.

Is your friend like this? Does she ignore people when they confront her and tell her to leave them alone?

lildol

10/6/2009 1:02:34 PM | IP

female from the abyss of confusion

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She's more passive aggressive about it... she is not contacting these guys, just obsessing over them and what they (potentially) are doing. She's resorted to calling me 'Dear Abby' as I give her alternative perspectives from what she is thinking (I tend to try to put out all other possible alternatives).

It's difficult for me to understand because she really approaches things opposite of me. I obsess more so on the front end of a relationship because I need direction and purpose, she's more likely to just go with it and enjoy the ride. I don't want to waste my time with something going nowhere, that's not to say I want to rush into a relationship, I just don't want to spend my time on a worthless cause. On the back end when it's over, it's over, I am not going to wast my time on the past. That doesn't move one forward in life.

LibrasRule36!

10/7/2009 10:10:04 AM | IP

female from Miami, Florida USofA

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Do Aries have problems letting go???

Yes, sometimes they do.

ariesfireice

10/19/2009 10:19:32 PM | IP

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lildol, Once she is over it she will be OVER IT!! right now she is hurting very much. Aries feel deeply when hurt and we get really REALLY angry. She is feeling angry right now. betrayed and she wants him to hurt. She will have to ride this out.

lovelygirl89

10/19/2009 10:33:50 PM | IP

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so true aries do get deeply hurt i wonder how are we so sensitive

Juan Moore-Beer2

10/20/2009 2:13:02 PM | IP

108 years old from Virgho_Khunt, AKA_(Lullenland)

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you put all your heart and soul into something/one and seeing it fall flat on its face is a huge disappointment. Aries take disappointments so very hard.
some choose not to show it though. it depends on one's placements.

AwesomeAries

10/27/2009 7:44:52 PM | IP

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Aries have no problem moving on... along... and letting it be over, when its over. I have NEVER had trouble getting over any of my exes. When I did the breaking up, it was especially easy for me to move right along. When its more mutual, it still never took me much time to bounce back. But in ONE case, just ONE CASE... I let myself be completely open, allowing a scorpio in... he's like an infection that I have yet to find a cure for. I hate it. I would love to find his replacement or bounce back to reality, like usual, but I can't. Im hurt deeply, sad, and miss him more than anything. We only dated for a few months and broke up SEVERAL months back... I totally feel her. Its sad.

I have no advice for you other than to be there for her she will develop a whole new respect for you. Aries don't like to show or tell you when they need you. But when there friends are there without being asked, aries feel important and will place you on a high pedestal. Forever you'll be repaid. But if you're not there... you will never be forgiven.

ramfishtwins

10/29/2009 1:52:24 PM | IP

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Posted by AwesomeAries
Aries have no problem moving on... along... and letting it be over, when its over. I have NEVER had trouble getting over any of my exes. When I did the breaking up, it was especially easy for me to move right along. When its more mutual, it still never took me much time to bounce back. But in ONE case, just ONE CASE... I let myself be completely open, allowing a scorpio in... he's like an infection that I have yet to find a cure for. I hate it. I would love to find his replacement or bounce back to reality, like usual, but I can't. Im hurt deeply, sad, and miss him more than anything. We only dated for a few months and broke up SEVERAL months back... I totally feel her. Its sad.

I have no advice for you other than to be there for her she will develop a whole new respect for you. Aries don't like to show or tell you when they need you. But when there friends are there without being asked, aries feel important and will place you on a high pedestal. Forever you'll be repaid. But if you're not there... you will never be forgiven.

Ha! Scorps will do that to us Aries everytime...know you are NOT alone.

Your last paragraph is so right on I get chills!

LovelyMissAries

11/6/2009 1:52:45 AM | IP

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Aries are kind of backwards that way. The people they trust the most are the ones least hard to get over whereas the people they're afraid of/paranoid about usually hurt them the worst. That's how it works for me anyway... but I suppose it leads back to "if your looking for something you're going to find it." theory.

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