Help me. Pisces man giving mixed signals. Help :-(

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1/4/2013 5:59:16 AM | More
Lynda25

This is my first ever post so I would really appreciate some advice.
So I met a pisces man in September (I'm cancer) things were better then great, he was very very keen, told me I'm his ideal woman, could feel something special between us etc. I started liking him back and things were wonderful. Neither of us had experienced anything like this...! He had his heart broken about 10 months ago and was struggling with that but it didn't seem an issue until last month he told me " he couldn't do this anymore, he is too damaged and he doesn't no what to do as he knows ending it with me will hurt him" I left him alone for a week then just text to see how he was and he replied straight away and then called me that evening to tell me, his feelings hadn't gone for me, and he didn't want to end it but he has some serious issues going on with family, work and his ex so he couldn't think about anyone else! For New Years I surprised him by turning up at his fishing lake to say happy new year and he seemed pleased to see me, then he text when I left saying " you are doing a fine job in making me realize my decision was flawed" and lots of other nice things like, "you are quite a woman" you have such an edge" but since then...nothing! I want this man soooo much but have said I'm willing to just be his friend...what do I do? Should I contact him again? Is he just not into me or is he just confused! Please help me
Thank you for reading :-)
Lynda
1/4/2013 8:22:44 AM | More
P-Angel

55 years old female from Planet Neptune  

Just

I had a detailed response all typed out telling you how you're being manipulated ... then decided, treetrunk it.


It's obvious in what you wrote .... if you're that stupid that you can't see it for yourself, then why should I bother with you?
1/4/2013 8:25:39 AM | More
P-Angel

55 years old female from Planet Neptune  

Just

Step away ... grow some maturity ... have some life experiences .... then maybe you'll be able to see past your desperation in wanting to be wanted, that you'll be able to spot the player without having to be told.


There are red flags all over your post ..... and no doubt, you aren't aware enough to see any because you have the fantasy of a relationship running around your head, and have chosen him to play the male role.


When you mature, hopefully, you'll be able to recognize this on your own without having to be told.




:::: shakes head ::::
1/4/2013 10:30:16 AM | More
Lynda25

Thank you for you reply but to be honest I don't see any reg flags in my above statement! He was the one who was over keen to begin with and I wasn't so sure. And still now he is always saying nice things! He is not a player, far that I know for sure. In relation to me not being mature enough...I'm in my late 20's and have has a lot of life experience including having a child, so I would say my maturity level is higher then most of my age! I'm also not desperate, but when I see/hear the things he is telling me its hard to turn away just because he is "not ready" I only wanted to hear from maybe a pisces man or someone who has had experience with them to tell me if I should persue him to show him I care or leve him alone!
1/4/2013 11:05:20 AM | More
shellshocker

Leave him alone. Let him sort out his stuff. If you don't want friendship... than don't agree to it and hope for more. It will backfire on you.

chasing=needy=immature

Why do you want a guy who "says" he doesn't want you? ....even if it's not "yet"

He said that^^^^^. You can't pick and choose the things you want to believe.

I think showing up and surprising him on NYE uninvited shows you care. Anything more than that is... *cough* desperate.
1/4/2013 11:21:37 AM | More
Lynda25

Thank you for your reply. The reason I don't want to give up is because he is very down at the moment (family/money issues) which he has told me about as he is getting very depressed because of them. I would happily leave him be and I have told him that of he does want me to leave him alone for good then I will but he said he can't say that! Like I said above, he admitted that "his desixion was flawed" meaning ending it with me was flawed so I know he does still care. And when we were together New Years I could tell he was very nervous still around me. I certainly do not want to come across desperate (as I'm not) I just care for him lots and know at some point we would be great together, when he sorts his issues out!
Also...are you pisces?

1/4/2013 11:28:06 AM | More
shellshocker

You are only looking for someone to confirm the decision(s) you have already made. You are also picking and choosing WHO you will listen too.

good luck with that...
1/4/2013 11:56:19 AM | More
Lynda25

I am willing to listen to anyone, even if that is not what I want to do in my heart, I will try if you guys think that's what's right. He has never said he doesn't want to be with me (just for the record) he said "I don't no what to do, I'm so damaged at the moment. You are in a much better place then me and I know ending it will be detrimental to me but what else can I do" and then "I didn't want to end it with you but I can't think about myself let alone another persons feelings" the above is way I'm finding it hard to let go...but if I should, then i will!
1/4/2013 2:35:58 PM | More
Lynda25

What do you mean by doing me a favor? I will leave him be as I'm not deprecate and wouldn't want to come across as such! I will still be there for him if he needs me and may send the odd text to see how he is as I know pisces men need that sometimes. Thank you for your comments and honesty.
1/4/2013 2:36:29 PM | More
Lynda25

Desperate...
1/4/2013 3:04:14 PM | More
LunarMaiden

female from July 11  

:D

He doesn't sound like he's ready nor right for you.

1/4/2013 7:34:21 PM | More
ashleyluvsbball

27 years old female from TX  US  

scorpio sun/cancer moon

Your situation sounds sooo familiar to mine!! My ex says that he doesn't need to be in a relationship right now and just needs to be alone. They both have money/family issues in common, so I can probably tell you how this situation will end. You just have to let him work his issues out and if he is ready/he wants to work things out woth you he will be back. You are in your late 20's as I am 26, we are too young to sit around and wait. Just worry about yourself and if it's meant to be it will happen!!! Hope I helped.
1/4/2013 7:40:50 PM | More
Striking

He's not done with his ex...Pisces loves love and if we connect with another we usually go for it..I promise you he and his ex are still involved some kind of way. I would stop contact with him and go on with my life...A Pisces man that is inlove into a woman never has to wonder..
1/4/2013 10:32:50 PM | More
Serafin

Lynda, I'm a pisces man dating an absolutely lovely cancer woman. With the right people, it can be one of the most harmonious relationships in the zodiac. I can't comment too much on your particular situation because I don't know the whole story, but sometimes, pisces dudes can get a little freaked out by things being too perfect and try and swim away. We can be escapists...especially if he's been burned bad before after thinking something was perfect, he's going to look for any way out. The problem is, he likely doesn't realize this escapist trait in himself, and that could be a problem for you, especially since he may get upset with you, and feel as though you are invalidating his feelings if you try and make him aware of it. Honestly, if he says he needs space, he's either lying, or does not want to be with you. If he's lying, he's trying to get some proof that you're really dedicated to him (by you not giving him space), which isn't fair to you, and I would advise against validating that, but I know you cancer gals...always the caretaker, which is nice when it's reciprocated, and he likely will, for a while. But he will also likely take you round and round this catch and release game until he either becomes aware of what he's doing, and how it's unfair to you, or you get sick of it. Honest communication is the key here, but that's always a fine line with a pisces...you have to be honest, and very sensitive...which I know cancer ladies are quite good at...well, the sensitive part, communication comes later after you shed that tough shell of yours.

Not really advice, but I hope it helped.
1/5/2013 7:04:31 AM | More
Lynda25

Ashleyluvbballs- are we talking about the same man??? Haha I really hope not :-/ it is very frustrating isn't it, when you know if they were in the right frame of mind, it would be perfect thank you for your words, I am going to be strong and leave him be. Although I left something round his when we last saw each other and he phoned last night to say he will bring it over and would like to take me for dinner as a thank you for being there for him...this is a good sign surly?
Striking - I can see how you could have come to that conclusion by what I wrote in my initial post...but I can safely say he cannot stand her! He was very hurt when she ended it and was struggling but whilst we were seeing each other he found out (by a mutual friend) she also cheated...that's when he ended it as he then also didn't trust women! I know there is nothing between them, I have always told him to be honest which he has done from the beginning! Even though it hurt sometimes!
Serafin - awww I'm so glad you have found a good match for you, it really is a great match when in the right time for both parties! We have such a connection when we are near each other that it kind of freaks me out, but I also love it :-) when we first met he did say..."I thought you were way out of my league" you're perfect, I have found a good one here" I'm a lucky boy etc etc...so maybe he was a bit freaked out...as I can feel his feelings for me when we are together, so I know it's not that! He is suffering with anxiety attacks because of all the rubbish he had going on, so I know he is seriously messed up at the moment. Anyway I'm blabbering now! I will meet him next week, tell him I'm here for him but do you think I should ask if he wants me to wait (not for years obviously) or should I move on and solely be his friend??? Thank you all so much for your advice :-)
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