Capricorn man ignorning me after lying to me

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4/26/2008 1:41:44 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

I met this Capricorn man who I was really attracted to and liked, but he is ignoring me know after a whole week of sending him text messages. He was mad at me before but came back to me. We were passionate with each other but after about the third time this second time around, he started complaining about my kisses. He complained that I kissed too long and he couldn't breathe. Than he would stay just for a little while and leave after he had something to eat or we talked for a awhile. He was not intimate with me anymore, but he told me he was going to take me out to dinner in two weeks that's friday, which is today. He ignored me this whole week now and he doesn't answer my text messages. In the past he told me he deserved better and told me I was insecure, clingy when I didn't act that way with him.That was the first time. Now I think he broke up with me for good and is igorning me. I really liked him alot and I was crazy for him but he is hurting me now. I think he is too judgemental and wants the perfect woman, which I'm not. I accepted him and liked hm just the way he is but he even mentioned in the past that he deserved better. I guess he rather be alone now than be with me because I notice he is home all the time. I think he thinks he can find better than me, but I just wonder why he thinks he deserves better if he can't be nice to me or at least courteous to me after I always treated him good. I wonder this guy he is now 40 and I am 49 years old. He accepted my age in the past and even told me I looked younger than my age. I think he will end up alone until he is 50 or maybe end up with a very strong, confident, cookiemonstery woman. I am a libra. Can you help me and advice me as to what to do now. I am stopping the text messages. It is out of the question to call him, because I know he will just be annoyed or not even anwer my calls. What do you think is best for me? I am really hurt by this.
4/26/2008 1:53:25 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

He did not take me to dinner after all. Guess he didn't keep his promise for a reason, but he doesn't even call me. He really hurt me in the past when he told me he deserved better. Like what am I, chopped liver. Like if I don't deserve better myself. I was patient and nice with him and I took him back. I baked him a pie, a lemon cake, made him salsas, but he completely ignores me now. PS, I don't know if he is having personal problems or what he won't talk to me, and sometimes I need to talk to him, but he wouldn't stick around much. I know he is trying to find a job right now because he has been reclocated from his work and was living out of state, but I took that into consideration. I gave him space and I respected him for pursuing a good career and job, but he came to me first and now I really want him. The only thing is I don't want him to hurt me and he has hurt me. I guess dinner was out of the question now. If he has problems why doesn't he talk to me about them, or is he just being a Capricorn and a jerk?
4/26/2008 2:06:53 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

When I mentioned the past that was about about 6 weeks ago I'm talking about. We knew each other for a week and than he ignored me for 3 weeks when he was upset about something he accused me of which I didn't do to him. I was already crazy about him.
When I proved him wrong he came back to me. So now this time around it looks like he is breaking up with me for good, I think. I don't like on and off relationships, they don't feel good in fact they hurt. It makes me feel very sad and I just wish I could stop thinking about this capricorn man hurting me this way. I think it is mean for any man to treat a lady this way who was good to him. So why is he this way and thinks he deserves better than I. Does he deserve better?
4/26/2008 3:04:08 PM | More
Freebird

female

"Follow Your Bliss" ~Joseph Campbell

another POV that may help you to understand why Mr. Cappy or any man for that matter is responding the way he is...is-

Let's say YOU met a guy and were attracted to him and wanted to get to know him better. You meet, feel a connection and he calls you. You get together with him and enjoy whatever is that you chose to do (hopefully not the "sex thing"). He begins to text you - for a whole week. Right here....*how are you feeling?

Ah...not much now going on at the moment in your life so you may reconnect with him, he brings you gifts, he cooks for you, has floweres delivered - EVERYDAY! You have a "nookie night" during your time together. During your time with him...you discover for some reason or another that you do not really care for the way he kisses you - so you tell him. Not wanting to hurt his feelings you stay with him for awhile and say that you will have dinner with him in 2 weeks. *how are you feeling?

So.....he has not heard from you in awhile and he again he begins to text you and you have him on "ignore" ~ in the past you have told him that he is insecure and that he deserves better - *why would you choose to tell someone this?

2 weeks later and you have not called him about the dinner you promised him - *why?


Maybe in your past you have felt this way with a man - if so, think back on his behaviour and why you chose not to engage with him. You may find your answer to all of your questions.





4/26/2008 3:21:21 PM | More
Freebird

female

"Follow Your Bliss" ~Joseph Campbell

"I don't like on and off relationships, they don't feel good in fact they hurt." -----> You have just experienced a "feeling" you now understand a bit more about YOU. You know what you do not like. GOOD - write that down and stick to it.

At this point, this IS what the relationship is about - you cannot change him so accept it. Find the courage within yourself to move ahead - if you stay in this relationship, you will be settling - do you deserve that?

"It makes me feel very sad and I just wish I could stop thinking about this capricorn man hurting me this way." ------> you can. Why are you choosing to put yourself in the role of a victim? You have a mind and it is yours, change your thought. He is not hurting you, YOU are hurting you. All thougts are nothingness until we attach a belief to them.


"So why is he this way and thinks he deserves better than I. Does he deserve better?"
----> Truthfully, it does not matter why he thinks this way - he just does and he can. My question to you is, Why are you acting and thinking the way you are? don't you deserve better?

Take the focus off of him and put it on you where it needs to be - he came into your life as a teacher so that you are able to grow and become more of who you are. Be very grateful for this incredible gift and see yourself as blessed.

What is very very cool about living here on Earth is that everything in each moment is perfect - it is happening as it needs to otherwise, it would not have happened.

Wishing you the best~
4/26/2008 4:31:57 PM | More
yolieoladyo52

Thank you for your replys. I guess I did feel insecure but that was because he made me feel that way. I just wanted him so bad and I was willing to take him back. I miss him now because he was such good company to me and he made me laugh. I rarely attracted to any men and this is probably the best looking one I have met so far. I wanted to keep him and build a relationship with him. I am still hoping he will come back to me but this time treat me better. I know he was attracted to me, I could tell by his eyes and the way he looked at me and smiled. Why does it have to be so hard to have a relationship with a capricorn. The hardest part is that he lives two houses down from me with his father, temporalily living om his dad's motor home. I can see when his home and he can see when I'm home. That's what makes it so hard just knowing and thinking that he's there. I want him to back. Am I wrong for wanting him? He seemed like such a good fit. I love his Texas accent, his charm and his humor, but I don't like his subborness. What can I do now if he sees me outside or if I see him outside?

4/26/2008 4:41:17 PM | More
Freebird

female

"Follow Your Bliss" ~Joseph Campbell

"I guess I did feel insecure but that was because he made me feel that way."

NO ONE makes you FEEL anything - You chose to feel insecure. You are blaming him for your own problems - it is not his fault. You need to work on correcting them yourself.

"Am I wrong for wanting him?" ----> in my opinion, under the current circumstances, YES.

"What can I do now if he sees me outside or if I see him outside?" what do you want to do?


ya know...I may be totally off here but me thinks by your questions that you are just messin' on these here boards.

Good day buck-a-roo

::hops on loyal horse and rides off with hand in air::

Higho Silver!
4/26/2008 5:22:53 PM | More
yolieoladyo52

You're right that's the problem I don't read those books about dating, but I should to help myself. I'm just the old fashioned hopeless romantic type. Your replies have helped me I have been hurt before by a man and maybe that's my problem. When I met this capricorn man from Texas who doesn't cheat and play the field I thought I was set. I guess I was wrong and I take to heart very seriously what you all wrote to me and I definetly don't want to contact him now. I want a good relationship and want someone to treat me with love and respect as I treat them. When he told me he deserved better that was because he was sore and thought I did something to him that I didn't do. When he came back we both didn't want to talk about it and just wanted to hug and kiss. that's why I was confused, since I got him back and loved having him back. Yes he was good looking butlooks weren't the only thing that drew me to him. I don't deserve to be treated bad, and waste my time on someone who plays me like a yoyo. It's just that I'm tired of being alone and wanted this man after a bad marriage and after my last boyfriend. I thought he was right for me. I kept trying to be positive. It didn't work. Thank you, hope we talk again soon. I will not contact him now. Thanks for your help. That was the reason for joining the site. I cried all day yesterday and this has helped.
4/26/2008 5:32:26 PM | More
yolieoladyo52

Thank you leokitten, latinaindia, freebird, your opinions help. I just needed to hear from somebody else. Libras like myself are lovers and want relationships to work. It's just not easy for me to be strong. I know alot of therapist and counselor will tell you all that love yourself therapy. But I'm very giving and loving, it's just hard to change.
4/27/2008 12:56:08 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

Thanks leokitten, you are so thoughtful and caring. A vacation sounds nice, but I think because of the state I'm in right now I would be depressed alone. I need people right now, and again I want to thank you for your support. I just came home after visiting my daughter and all of a sudden Im sad again because I see his car in front of his dad's house where it is always parked. I guess he won't try to call me, and Im not going to call him no way. I know better now. Just wish he would call me instead. At least to talk. I'm not texting him anymore either, because he just ignores me anyways. It's obvious he doesn't want me. Your messages gave me the strength I needed to stop trying anymore with him. I can date other men but haven't really found any I was interested in lately. I think the good ones are taken already. Any ideas?
4/27/2008 2:28:51 PM | More
exoticscorpion

Hey Yolieolady, i dated a capricorn once and i had another scorpio friend who dated a carpicorn and we both said that we would never do it again and i mean that. Don't feel too bad. My capricorn was weird and this guy that you're talking about is weird too. Their feelings are easily hurt and they can't tolerate anything that they perceive as being rejection. Rejection to them is like kryptonite to superman. He would always come around but never for too long. For about the first week after we met he called me everynight and we had wonderful conversations, until one night he came to my house (we didn't have sex) and after that night he stopped calling me and ignored my calls, then he told me that i was playing games...well after awhile we started talking again and for about another year it was just full of nonsense...his lack of intimacy and lack of committment was too much for me, i was looking for much more..i always dated other people but i would always want to be with just him....but enuff was enuff and i moved on...two years after we met, he finally got real with me and told me that he thought that i wanted to be with my exhusband, because that night that he came over, he saw some of my husbands things there (we were going thru a divorce)...and he didn't want to get hurt...but instead of him being honest and communicating that with me, he kept that inside for all that time..and at that point i was in love with someone else. And now i treat him like crap and he's still always in my face..he got to the point of leaving letters on my windshield becuz i wouldnt return his phone calls. So maybe you did something to this guy that really hurt his feelings....They always have a problem apologizing...and its not just the male capricorns, the females are just as wacky...i say just move on to someone better, becuz those caps aren't worth it....It'll be a lifetime of headaches.

4/28/2008 12:42:09 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

Hi exoticsropion. You are probably right. I did try to make him jealous the last time I saw him right before he left, because he didn't really want to kiss me or be intimate with me anymore. So I told him I had a date tonight. He just said if that's what you want to do. He didn't left empty handed though, I gave him a small lemon cake I baked him to take home and gave him a kiss and held his hand before he left. He hasn't called or text me since then. I text message him the day after he left though and told him I broke the date because I wasn't in the mood to date any other men right now. Also I told him I would rather be with him. But he didn't respond. In fact I send him messages all week and not one phone call or respond from him. Till today this morning about 10:00 am he called but only let it ring one time and hung up. I didn't call him back figuring he would call again, but he didn't. I think he just wants me to chase him or he's playing games. I want him badly but I want him to be steady with me and stop playing hard to get. I'm sticking to the advice I got here and I'm not calling him back, even though I can't get him off my mind. I think I fell in love with him. which was too soon. I don't want to get hurt.
4/28/2008 12:56:13 AM | More
yolieoladyo52

Freebird I think you gave me very good advice and latinaindia I read that thread decodding scorpio and I believe it is very good advice. Thank you for that. As you see I got another message from exoticscorpion and I answered it back if you want to read it. Please keep in touch.
4/28/2008 9:52:05 AM | More
exoticscorpion

You see, that's what did. And to be honest with you it was probably something that you did unconciously that set him off. It more than likely was something very very small and insignificant that hurt his feelings. Something that you won't know unless he tells you. this is how they are. And i don't care what anyone says, actions always speak louder than words. if he doesn't like you, why is he still coming around. It doesn't do any good to try and make things better with them because once they get something in their head, they stick with it. the cap guy that i was talking about once told me that he doesn't get mad, he gets even. So that is what this guy is doing to you. Just treat him like crap, find someone else, and i bet that he'll be back in your face and one day he'll get real.
4/28/2008 9:55:19 AM | More
exoticscorpion

Everyone thinks that they have the love thing down pat. if it was that easy than why isn' everyone happy and married and all that. People act different when they love. and sometimes people will say hurtful things to you to protect themselves and it doesn't mean that they don't care. sometimes people care so much that they are afraid to show it for fear of being hurt. think about the little boy that hits or punches the little girl because he likes her. well grown men are the same way.
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