Any other lirba's suck at love?
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|I was just wondering because I know I sure do. When it comes to one night stands no probs but when I really like a girl I seem to always get hurt!|
|Maybe because you jump in to fast, tard. :p Libras amaze me with how fast they fall in and out of relationships. Slow the hell down. For being indecisive you guys sure do rush into this type of thing rather quickly...|
Posted by rockyroadicecream
Okay, so there's a lot of truth in this. Seems CRAZY to us non-Libras, how fast those Leebs can fall into relationships, only to have them fizzle out just as quickly. (And Libras often have a string of very short term "relationships" before they find The One!) But one thing I've come to understand about Libras is that it's not malicious, and it's not them trying to hurt or use people.. it's just their way to try the relationship on for size. Instead of moving slowly, like say a Cap, they throw themselves headlong into it, treating it as oh so serious right away.. to see how it fits, to see how it works. Usually, it doesn't work -- which is normal for most relationships with ANY given signs -- but the Libra is left with a bad rep for moving "too quickly" and "acting like everything was perfect and amazing until POOF"... when they wouldn't have been painted SUCH a villain, had they just moved more slowly and cautiously, and both decided it "just isn't working out"...
Posted by Libra77
My own Libra is very much like this.. several serious relationships, but with many short term attempts in between, and a few broken-hearted, confused girls in his wake. The girls that managed to move past "casual/starting" and into "serious and committed"... well, they ALL hurt him eventually.
His HS gf of 2 years, a Sag.. cheated with a friend of his while he was in boot camp, and dumped him on leave. The next gf was a Gemini for 2.5 years.. probably she didn't actually hurt him too much.. by the time she left him, it was a dead and loveless relationship he was too young and chicken-butter to end himself. The next was an Aqua (almost 7 yrs) who left him practically at the altar for the "just a coworker" she'd been cheating with for a year. Then a Sag who dumped him ("needed space") to date another guy (prob was cheating, but wasn't caught) after 6 months.. then a Pisces who kept going online behind his back to arrange hook ups.. dumped him when confronted, only a 2 mo relationship, but hurt him a lot cuz he'd started letting his guard down. Then there's me... after over 20 years of "dating failures" and "relationship failures".. I put them in quotes, cuz even though they seem like failures (at the time).. each and every experience shaped and molded him into the guy who met me when he was 36, and found his best friend, his biggest fan and admirer, and a true blue lover who straight up adores him.. and we've been through a lot together, ups and downs, and know this is what we both want.
I'm actually AMAZED the guy can find the willpower to TRUST me to not cheat, he's been cheated on soooo many times. So when I see his little flares of jealousy, his little flashes of insecurity and fear that maybe I'll cheat and he'll lose me after our 3+ years.. well, I understand it. I get why it happens. But I've never cheated in my life, and I won't start now.
So now that he's turning 40, he's finally with the woman he can lavish all of his Libra love and attention on.. and she really appreciates it and reciprocates. And he says it was worth everything, even if he didn't know it at the time his heart was getting broken over and over again, by all the wrong women.
|I've only dated one libra(I'm a Sag male) and we were together for three months and yes...I'm still confused. I've read up a lot on Libras on this site for the past few weeks. I've even gotten some private advice on them. I understood them instinctively, but it was very eye opening to actually have their thoughts and actions put into words. I'll take a stab at some advice for you. What Nefer said is correct..take it slow. You don't have to rush things. Be friends first and hold off on the romantic phase for a while. Don't over think/analyze their nuances, actions, and words. Libras tend to be overly critical after the initial butterflies have worn off. This often leads to judging people and making assumptions because of what you see/hear. Although something's are obvious, that person is also reacting to you as well. So be aware of what you say and do and how you go about the relationship or friendship. Realize there's a difference between what is fair and what is the right thing to do. Trust your instincts/intuition. Libras and Sags have very sharp intuitions and instincts. If something doesn't feel right...it probably isn't. Be peaceful but don't be afraid of a confrontation. Everyone has some feelings of what is right and fair. If you feel the need to disappear, talk to them about it. While there are some people that you should run away from, most people are willing to talk to you. Use your diplomatic skills when doing this, but be honest and truthful. People will react one way or the other regardless of what you do, so don't be afraid of being seen as the bad guy. Have confidence in your decisions and don't be afraid to make a mistake. If you do, learn from it. You don't have to get everything right all the time. That's how you truly learn and strengthen yourself. Relax and go with the flow. It's ok to fly the coop, but that shouldn't be your first move when things start to go sour. Remember, that person isn't perfect. They are human beings. If they are willing to fight for you and beside you, treat you with respect and consideration, they may be worth keeping long term. They may not be tidy or neat, but their strengths may lie in other areas. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. If you want to be adored, treasured, etc you have to give it. You don't automatically get it because of who you are. Love begets love, trust begets trust. Most of all, true love is selfless. You have to accept the person in front of you...all of them.|
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Posted by Nefer
Malicious or not, it's an absolutely immature way of dealing with it. I'm not going to be an apologist for this flaky sign. While I understand it's WHAT they do, WHY they do it can be rather ridiculous. Total disregard for others' feelings is bs. The end. They avoid conflict because they're wusses, but it's supposedly for the others' "sake." They should just get "the hint." Yes, so honorable. The only person's feelings they care about is their own. God forbid they have to face any conflict. So leaving the other person in the dark is perfectly acceptable. Conflict is scurry!
And this isn't just my experience or things I've witnessed irl, but some of the lame assed reasoning given by Libras HERE. Sign aside, I have zero respect for ANYONE who won't take others' feelings/circumstances into consideration before wining and dining them like that. Dating is dating, but treetrunking the other person up in the process isn't exactly supposed to be a part of it. "Try on for size" with the intent known. Not this fairytale bs that goes away after 1-2 months. Nobody likes a chickentease. Libras- chickenteases of the zodiac. Nice enough people, just frustrating as hell.
|Lol, as if.|
|I think sometimes us Librans tend to idealise the object of our affections. That's why you get romantic declarations a bit too early. Having said that, I tend to hold off making commitments until I'm a bit more sure, so we're not all like that. If you can learn something from each time the serious relationships didn't work out the way you wanted, then all is not lost. You'll find your dream girl one day! Maybe the lesson this time is to take more time to get to know her and be sure she's right for you.|
Posted by everevolvingepithet
Posted by LibraRose
And that's finding love in a nutshell. I think that is what happened in my relationship. Some of her declarations, while sounding wonderful, I kinda new they were just words. It was beautiful and we loved each other deeply in the truest sense of love. She's just now discovering that she's a libra and actually I had to tell her that lol. Of course I feel she made a mistake because in her words I have her everything she wanted. But I guess shes looking for more and I say good luck because it doesn't get much better than what we had. I've moved on and after she dated a few a-holes and appreciates what I bring to the table, maybe she'll come around. By then though, it may be too late.
Posted by everevolvingepithet
chickenteases don't realize they're chickenteases. :p
Posted by LibraRose
Good for you though. Nobody is perfect, but for one to realize what they're doing wrong or that they tend to do something that causes problems, says a lot. I don't think enough people do that, especially when it comes to approaching relationships, which is why you get posts like this. "Hmm, this keeps happening when I do XYZ..."
I don't think enough people really evaluate themselves or the situation enough before jumping in like they do. Are you mentally ready to date so you won't go around tormenting everyone you date? No hang ups left over from past relationships? It's like those people who jump from relationship to relationship. They're running in because they want to. Who cares about the other person that has to put up with their issues that were never addressed or resolved?
Same goes for those who jump in too fast. Not only does it set up for potential disaster if it sticks, but there are a lot of people who are turned off to that behavior. "OMG, THEY'RE MOVING TOO FAST!!" It's kind of a double whammy for Libras. :/