Capricorns Pleaseeeeeee!!

I have been with my cap for over three years(long distance) but we were together before we both left home for further studies.He comes to visit me as often as he could.To cut the story short his family had issues with my in laws and he is determined that we would not have anything to do with them when we get married.I have been trying to talk him out of this but he is so bent on it.Don't know what to do anymore cos it will affect my relationship with my sister.I am libra by the way.Could someone please give me an insight into this cos am loosing it.I have grown to learn a lot about caps and their ways but he is almost swearing on this.I love him and have told him so.A part of me wants to give it some more time but for how long?

I should let Csweetie or Sb and sagi handle this. They are very insightful.
(Im replacing him with her)

I would let her know up front and right now where you stand. Do not let her gain momentum by letting the situation linger.
If you understand your family better than he does then there is no debating.
I would ask her what does he mean or who does she think she is by saying "we"?
Then I would ask her how could she ever demand such a thing like that?
I would tell her that I will deal with them and that she doesnt have to. Theyre my family and youre what you are.
If my family was that much for her then I wouldnt blame her.
I would basically let her know that thats not how its going to be and that she doesnt need be concerned with my interactions with them as long as she loves me🙂
I'm keeping you and my family. Next subject.

Clearly both sides (your family & boyfriend) need to think alittle more about you and not each other🙂

To trap u in the middle of something like this is very cruel and selfish from both sides.

I might would let both sides see how it is without my presence long enough for it to hurt real good. (just an approach)

Neither side wants to move so you may need to passively move your "pieces". Position them so both their options and their own remedies are useless to your objective. If they dont have anything to fight over then they cant fight over it. You are the one in control of this situation and it may be high time both sides understand this. What can they do but sit back and watch you work??!?!

They are taking advantage and making idle threats because you havent laced up your boots and held your mouth right.

This is just me, but if it were me I wouldnt be their tug-o-war. You ever seen the movies where multiple sides go after something they value very dearly...usually they end up destroying themselves and the thing they valued above all else. I would make it clear that III am the object of endangerment.

Boyfriend is being very immature. Sure he can feel like he feels, but hes not helping the situation. If hes not with you then he's against you. This is the way I would look at it especially if I were your age. In fact Im pretty close which is why I know you shouldnt have time for this crap. We are in an economic crisis🙂

Thanks supercap I guess its always good to look at things from a third party's view.I am in more control of my emotions and think I should give it some days before bringing it up again I really feel caged in having to choose.Will keep you posted

mentor me please wonderfully wise cappy lady.😉

(comes bearing stardust)

and youre also welcome Janny. I appreciate your respect. You have mine as well.

Thanks sagigoat that was really straight some of the points you raised I already had worked out for myself.Good to hear from a lady.I had the talk again and told him to think things through I am ready to start a family in the near future(my decision) but with someone who will take me and my sista into consideration.The response was fine will think about it.At the moment I am going to get on with my life.

Thanks once again and I do like the way you highlight your points -very attentative.

haha I did ask... got answers.
Sure betting my last penny u were in the legal field

Posted by janny

I have been with my cap for over three years(long distance) but we were together before we both left home for further studies.He comes to visit me as often as he could.To cut the story short his family had issues with my in laws and he is determined that we would not have anything to do with them when we get married.I have been trying to talk him out of this but he is so bent on it.Don't know what to do anymore cos it will affect my relationship with my sister.I am libra by the way.Could someone please give me an insight into this cos am loosing it.I have grown to learn a lot about caps and their ways but he is almost swearing on this.I love him and have told him so.A part of me wants to give it some more time but for how long?

Hey Ms Libra, you have a capricious cap boyfriend. Okay let's get real sign is a no factor here, you have a stubborn boyfriend.

Here is the deal family is a make or break in any relationship. If you got a BF that said he won't get along with your family. This guy is no good. He is selfish and unbalance. No one should ever come between you and your family and say that they love you. EVER!

True family can do dumb things and hurt us but in the end we are family. We live together so we must learn to deal with each other.