I need some advice from Geminis (long post)

I am a Scorpio, born 4th Nov 1956. He is a Gemini born 18 June 1956.

We first met when we were both 16. Six years later we reconnected. We had an attraction but never
acted on it as we were married to our first spouses.
He moved to the other side of the country and we lost contact for a while and when our marriages broke down about the same time we spent hours on the phone talking until I began seeing my late 2nd husband. We lost contact again for 16 years.

We recently reconnected again in late August and we spoke for 2 hours on the phone like the old days...there were many long calls catching up. He had been retrenched from his job he had put his house up for sale and bought a trailer and was now living not far over the border from me and was coming to see his brother and would drop in. He admitted to having feelings for me over the years. We ended up being intimate.

He told me about his 2nd broken marriage, another r/ship and about his fianc?e who left him
13 mths ago while he was away working and only leaving a note and that she broke his heart, he said she still called him sometimes, he sounded frustrated over that. She did not ask for any settlement after she left.

During the next call after he went home he said he still had feelings for his ex and it wasnt fair on me. I said I could understand that as I still loved my late husband.
I asked if he wanted us to back off..he said no he didn't want to...so we continued to talk on the phone and he invited me to come over and stay with him, it was all planned and then he heard he got the job he applied for and would be packing up and moving further away and I could come visit when he was settled. He also had word his house had been sold. This was mid September.

We decided to meet halfway for the weekend and spent a lovely time together, going to the cinema, shopping, out for dinner, watching movies , we even went fishing and of course the best lovemaking ever. He talked of us going on some holidays together and even wanted me to get a passport.

When it came time for us to leave each other it was hard to say goodbye..he said follow me back for a couple of days..I said I couldn't as I had work commitments that week...we had already stayed an extra day.

The calls continued and we made plans for me to come over after my birthday next Monday. I was to leave on the 5th Nov.

We discussed not sleeping with anyone else whilst we were apart and he agreed, but added if the ex fian

the ex fiancee turned up it —could?? happen. I asked what was the likelihood of that happening and he said not very likely at all, so we continued on. He helped me thru a rough weekend (5/6 Oct) as the 5th was my late husbands b'day. we talked again of me coming over. It was understood neither of us wanted to marry again or live with someone on a full time basis, that we would take turns to visit each other as we were only going to be 6 hours away.

He had the flu and I rang him (Oct 10) to see how he was. He told me straight away that Kate had contacted him and needed his help, it had something to do with her daughter and son in law, he said I dont mind helping them out. I said to be careful as I didnt want him to get hurt....he said he wasnt going to be and that he was not going to sleep with her. He was meeting with her on the Saturday (12th) wanted to see what she had to say and he would call me on the weekend. The call never came. I texted him a few times saying —are u ok— as last time he had the flu he got pneumonia. I emailed him and only phoned him once..and he didnt pick up.

His: (birth time unknown)
Sun Gemini 26.20
Moon Libra 21.59
Mercury Gemini 4.07
Venus Cancer 3.38 R
Mars Pisces 7.35
Jupiter Leo 26.36
Saturn Scorpio 27.34 R
Uranus Leo 0.23
Neptune Libra 27.46 R
Pluto Leo 26.28
Lilith Capricorn 21.43
Asc node Sagittarius

Mine:
Sun Scorpio 11.18 Ascendant Libra 10.56
Moon Scorpio 24.06 II Scorpio 18.05
Mercury Scorpio 5.39 III Sagittarius 14.05
Venus Libra 3.31 IV Capricorn 6.16
Mars Pisces 16.49 V Capricorn 29.25
Jupiter Virgo 24.22 VI Aquarius 28.44
Saturn Sagittarius 2.34 VII Aries 10.56
Uranus Leo 6.57 VIII Taurus 18.05
Neptune Scorpio 0.35 IX Gemini 14.05
Pluto Virgo 0.14 Midheaven Cancer 6.16
Lilith Aquarius 7.13 XI Cancer 29.25
Asc node Scorpio 28.57 XII Leo 28.44

Unless death or dismemberment, he's being a coward. There's nothing that "could happen" at this age and given his experiences...no bueno. Be good to yourself 🙂

thank you. It is so unlike him...maybe his past experiences have caused him to be cold and cruel? It hurts so much. He even told me this would work when I was skeptical.

he finally contacted me after 2 months..he paid the ex out and told her to shove off....then he had problems with one of his adult kids.....I let him have it over the non contact for which he actually said he deserved....we have gone into friend zone. We spent the last week of 2013 together and had lots of long chats where he really opened up to me...and as I guessed he suddenly closed up and withdraw a little...I think I am getting used to this pattern now LOL

He slept with her and that's why the call never came. Thats just what I think might have happened. I could be wrong.

Posted by Geminivixenn

Posted by DeeG
He slept with her and that's why the call never came. Thats just what I think might have happened. I could be wrong.

As a Gemini I would of been long gone.. I guess Scorpios hold onto things longer?

click to expand

GV....you know when you have feelings for someone it's not always that easy......aren't you still thinking about the aries? 😉

Hey, Gemvix, whats ur Moon?

It's unfortunate but 9 times out of ten, a mans ego will always supersede the size of his dick.

I spent the last week of the year with him (will refer to him as SF)....we had a long talk.
he said he didn't get any of my texts after the one I sent on 13th October.(in which I told him I really cared about him)....we suspect his adult daughter (who was visiting him for a month) had deleted them as she was wanting him to get back with her mother...he thought I was ignoring him...the longer he left it the harder it became for him to get the courage to call me..

During his last call (10th Oct) he said "I cant give you what you need, you need someone who u can have daily contact with and I cant give you that, I have no love to give anymore..my heart is too broken, maybe you should go on eharmony" so when he didn't respond I did just that.

When he called out of the blue on 13th Dec I told him I had taken his advice and met someone on an online (will call him GL,a Sagittarius )..I told him we chatted for a few weeks, then GL asked me if he could take me for lunch for my b'day which was coming up..we had a nice time..and he asked if he could see me again and I said yes..we went to a concert on 6th Dec..then Xmas dinner and show at a local club on the 14th Dec.

SF's words were "I cant believe that you actually signed up on there" ....he told me GL was moving too fast when I said we were planning a trip together....... Not to believe everything he tells me..he has an agenda and lots of other negative things.blah blah blah...

He was travelling back down to the southern states and called me from every town he stopped over in.He had a big argument with the daughter as she wanted him to hang around for Xmas and spend time with the mother.....which is when he made contact again..he was very upset...never heard him that emotional before....

On the 19th dec GL was here at my home and cooked lunch .....he was talking about taking a trip on his Harley.....and going to a stage show with him..he had gone out back for a smoke..then asked if he could use the shower as it was a humid day....after he got out he decided to go home......he called me a few times about trivial stuff that afternoon..then early in the evening he called me again and said "there is something I need to tell you.....my ex called me last night (weds 18th) and although I love you I am in love with her and there is a chance we my get back together.. I'm sorry I thought i was ready for a r/ship, but i am not and have hurt you in the process....she had called hi

him again while he was out smoking....

I couldn't talk...I was dumbfounded....so I said I have to go.....i sent a text to SF saying "I really need someone to talk to may i ring you?" he replied "yes" straight away.....of course I got the lecture of "told you he was moving too fast etc etc"

he told me he was going to try to get to ***** by Xmas day.....i warned him of some wild weather there the day he was to travel.....I sent him a text on the day of Xmas eve asking if he arrived there ok....I received one back later in the afternoon asking me to call when I could......so i called him and he said "in relation to were I am...lets say I am closer than u think"

he said "this is your xmas present! Pack your bag with enough for a week, you are coming camping with me..call me Xmas Day and I will tell u where I am. We are going to talk about everything that has gone on"..we are both agreed we were going into that week with eyes wide open, no expectations, no commitments, no attachments...

I arrived there on the 26th and that was the only night we were intimate.....
We had a talk the next morning (27th)I asked why he didnt answer my text of the 13th and he said he felt I came on too strong n thought I wanted a full on r/ship........I told him that was not what I wanted.....and I am glad I have my friend back....he said your friend has an always will be here....I asked if I could give him a kiss and he said so I gave him 2, then he said 3 for luck lol....later on I hugged him and thanked him for being my friend and asking me to come camping...he hugged me back and said you are welcome.....

He opened up to me about all of his previous relationships and much more....which is unlike him....I said I am not after anything from you...he said "i know u are not like the others"..in bed that night he confided some other stuff health wise...I know he is scared...but he would never admit it.

He said i love u is something he wont say to another woman....then he said...but then u never know..i may say them again for the right person....he says that every woman who has said it has broken his heart...i told him i have no intentions of doing that...

By the 28th i had to 2 texts, i missed call and an email from gl...one text said "i miss you" sf saw the look on my face and he said "whats up?" so i told him..he said "let it go"

I got up early next morning (29th)and sat outside...when sf got up he said "what's wrong ,u are too quiet"...told him "I am confused

by the I miss u text...he said "let it go u will never be able to trust him and that is not a good start...and u dont need any crap" I said "what if he is the real deal"..he said "he isnt" (this from someone who gave me grief lol)

I said "i need to tell him something.I know how much it hurts when someone doesnt text back"...and looked at him....he gave me a guilty smirk.

Then about the 30th...he started his typical Gemini back off thing again.... I sensed it coming this time. Seems to happen when our time together is drawing to a close.....i am wondering if after a certain time frame he feels he is getting in too deep....he didnt like GL texting and ringing either, so couldve added to it....

I ask myself "if his perception i was coming on too strong..and he still believes i want a r/ship....why the hell keep me around and why invite me out camping and appeared to be get jealous of GL contacting me?"
GL rang me early NYE when he rang I walked away from the camp, i had ignored his calls prior...SF kept watching me talking...the call rattled me...GL said there is a chance he will never get back with the ex...he still wanted to be friends with me...after the call I went in the van and SF came hovering twice and paused at the door....prob to see if I was still talking....When we went to bed i told him about the convo with GL and that he still wants to be friends and that i was going to allow him a face to face meeting when i go home..sf said "NO, no friends, no meeting" I said i will be locking up my heart and be like you....

We kissed goodnight and suddenly he said "u want a r/ship with me....and i am going to be single the rest of my life. I have no love to give" I said "I don't" he kept saying "yes, you do" he said we can only be friends and no more sex...then he said to go to sleep..I said I haven't finished what i wanted to say.....he said "Annie! Go to sleep!"..so i didn't push it....during the night I placed my hand on his waist and he threw it off....I asked him for a hug and he ignored me...

I was going to sneak off NY's morning (as me being a typical emotional Scorpio felt hurt)...leaving a note thanking him for a great end to 2013...telling him to stay safe... ....but i looked at him sleeping...and my heart melted cos i thought of **** leaving him a note when she left him...so I slid in beside him and gently gave his shoulder a shake....said "I am off now" ..he mumbled...I kissed him on the cheek and said "talk soon" he said "ok be careful"..I said I left a note on the table..he said ok ....I sent a text saying i was home safe..and never got a response back....which is not unusual....

GL and I had a meeting,we talked for about 3 hours... if "she" turned up he would leave me in a heartbeat.We enjoy each others company so we will hang out and go to shows etc together as we both would like a companion to do those things with....he said we cant help whom we love..i understand that as i love sf.....but he doesnt know he is more than a friend.....we both know it could end at any time..he said if I find someone he would wish me luck and let me go....I sent SF a text to say I had spoken to GL...that i felt i had to mainly for me....and nothing more than that...that was 2 weeks ago and I havent heard from him....
he doesn't like texts and would rather have calls...but i am holding out on them heehee...plus I think he is angry with me....what do u Gems make of it—....and I am finding Sags are like Gems in a way LOL

he has a lot of water in his chart..is that why he seems emotional and moody (Cancer Moon) and why I am attracted to him??
Is he jealous?? Am I doing the right thing not contacting him?? Does he want me to say I want a r/ship?

Annie, I feel for you. I really do.

The thing about men is that they often tell us, in words, precisely what they want and how they intend to act.

The thing about women is that we can ignore words and try to dig below the surface in search of ulterior motives or hidden feelings. We wonder what men "really mean", or how they "really feel" even though they have already told us point-blank.

My advice is to put full stock in his words and proceed accordingly. Believe him when he tells you who he is and what he intends to be to you. Sex is just sex, and doesn't change his words and intentions.

I've been there, and I wish you the best.

Posted by Annie56
he has a lot of water in his chart..is that why he seems emotional and moody (Cancer Moon) and why I am attracted to him??
Is he jealous?? Am I doing the right thing not contacting him?? Does he want me to say I want a r/ship?

oops Moon is Libra (my asc) his Venus is Cancer

Posted by Whimsy
Annie, I feel for you. I really do.

The thing about men is that they often tell us, in words, precisely what they want and how they intend to act.

The thing about women is that we can ignore words and try to dig below the surface in search of ulterior motives or hidden feelings. We wonder what men "really mean", or how they "really feel" even though they have already told us point-blank.

My advice is to put full stock in his words and proceed accordingly. Believe him when he tells you who he is and what he intends to be to you. Sex is just sex, and doesn't change his words and intentions.

I've been there, and I wish you the best.

Thanks yes and as a Scorp I cant help but dig....he did say once "you already see thru me....and u try to dig too deep"