advice from aqua men please! !

Hey I'm a pices lady...met my aqua Guy almost a a year ago online. We hit it off great. The banter between us was natural. We never fight...seriously we don't....I have had my mood swings....but he ALWAYS breaks the tension with a well worded yet inappropriate comment. I seriously have very deep feelings for him...but I work really hard to never let him see that....Why?? After our first intimate encounter...I became clingy....my Pisces nature wouldn't let it be casual. This change in me made him curious, but he never asked to have me over and was never invited to do activities with him, for a really long time. We both agreed to remain friends as we obviously enjoy our chats....trust me, no topic is off limits....lol....months roll by..but ..he never allowed more than 3 weeks to pass before texting or calling. He would always call to say a simple hello and how you been. I never asked of his whereabouts. I would pick up the conversation as if we just talked the day before. Recently we ran into each other, and we both remained casual and he asked me over for a visit. I agreed. My friend who was watching from a distance comments that I'm going to "get some". I laughed and disagreed with her.....well she was right. A couple days later he invited me over again. Unfortunately as a single Mom spontaneity is not always an option. So I declined...sadly tho his home caught fire that same night. So we haven't talked much since...which is understandable. My question for aqua men is......is there a future possibility with this man?? I realize I am competing with other women for his attention. Am I just a "Booty Call"? Or if I play my cards right....can this become real?.....like in a couple years? LOL I know the waiting seems crazy maybe even desperate, but the chemistry between us is amazing....the sex is weird....but in a fun, good way. Looking into his eyes there is a deepness about him....and I know he has feelings for me...not that he'll admit it....but I see it when I look into his eyes. Also when I asked my friend how she knew things would get intimate during out visit...she said we both have amazing chemistry and enven though we acted casual....there was tons of body language going on. Being Pisces myself....I am a hopeless romantic....but this is a great man....and he is very mysterious to me....I'm intrigued and know he'll be worth it.....if its even possible to win him......HELP!!!!! Am I Seriously Crazy—

Sadly men feel this thing called "chemistry" with just about almost every woman that he's attracted to so you placing importance on the chemistry puts you in a desperate weak position. Listen, if you seriously want true romance that evolves into a relationship, chatting every 3 weeks is not going to get you there, being his on call booty call every now and then won't get you there. Raise your standards because men like him are a dime a dozen, meaning they are everywhere.

He's had a whole year to seal deal. Don't you think/feel that's more than enough time for him to decide that he wants more than just a phone call buddy and an occasional shag buddy?

Did you see his burnt down house/apartment? Was it on the news? If you just took his word for it then most likely it was a lie, be careful, some Aqua men can be huge commitmentphobes when they are on the fence and you'll be waiting until you're gray and I know he's not worth that, no amount of chemistry is worth waiting that long.

Stop having sex with him, RAISE YOUR STANDARDS if a real relationship is what you want. Where is the whining and dining, hell he can at least take you out for a burger and fries before he try to hit it.

I'm an Aqua, huge commitmentphobe before I settled down. To make sure things remain equal, don't be there all the time, give him a bit of a challenge, stop being so easy and I'm not just talking sexually, I mean being easy period, you're desperation won't make him act any faster or make him anymore interested than he already is.

Open your options. You can't help but feel and appear desperate if you have no options other than him, you can't even fake it, turn down more booty calls and see if he'll take a more active interest in really spending quality time with you, if not then move on, you don't want to be just his friend, you want to be his lover, his girlfriend, his one and only.

He's not mysterious, he's just not allowing you to know him because it's BORING, you like mysteriousness because it's intriguing but if you truly wanted a real relationship, you'd jump ship on his mysterious ass and find a more available man.

No he's not going to be with you beyond what you already have, if that's okay with you then you should do fine with him, if it's not okay then consider moving on to a more available, open, transparent kind of guy that's open to having a real relationship.

Some of these online guys have issues IMHO, mysterious equals bat shit crazy douchebag.

Tiki33....very well said....Thank You....first off...yes his house did burn down. It was on the news, and I'm sure he feels pretty stupid over it. It was a "WTF were you thinking??" kind of fire. BUT....as much as I enjoy my conversations with him and the random hookup....I have been debating on walking away from it. I have been seeing other people too....I just find myself totally sucked in by him. Its a tough decision though, because we do get along incredibly well. He doesn't get or show jealousy of my dating...and in return I dont show my jealousy either...We have an understanding....with that said....I know my feelings go much deeper for him than just casual.....sex. And, YES...
He is a HUGE commitmentphobe....he's having too much fun being a bachelor 😢 Sadly I think for my sanity sake....I should move it along.......NEXT!? LOL

Tiki33....very well said....Thank You....first off...yes his house did burn down. It was on the news, and I'm sure he feels pretty stupid over it. It was a "WTF were you thinking??" kind of fire. BUT....as much as I enjoy my conversations with him and the random hookup....I have been debating on walking away from it. I have been seeing other people too....I just find myself totally sucked in by him. Its a tough decision though, because we do get along incredibly well. He doesn't get or show jealousy of my dating...and in return I dont show my jealousy either...We have an understanding....with that said....I know my feelings go much deeper for him than just casual.....sex. And, YES...
He is a HUGE commitmentphobe....he's having too much fun being a bachelor 😢 Sadly I think for my sanity sake....I should move it along.......NEXT!? LOL

He get along with every woman incredibly well because practice makes perfect. Bachelors date at an enormous rate, the more they date the better they get at perfecting their charm and disarm skills, it really can suck when a woman decides he's it for her because for him she's just another option.

Bachelors are so much fun but once you start to feel something other than casual fun it's best you be moving along before you break your own heart by misinterpreting everything between the both of you.

Men are only commitmentphobes when they don't want to be involved with any one particular woman, most women want to be the one but he's going to be very particular about giving his heart away and it won't be so easily given, this makes for a very attractive man that appears masculine because he stays staunchly on HIS OWN SIDE, he never strays into a woman's emotions, he's only concerned about himself which can appear very masculine and attractive to some women.

It's up to you stick around, he'll catch the hint and move along but for whatever chance he becomes persistent about seeing you then him seeing you must be in the form of a date and I'm not talking about his couch to his bed kind of date, make him work for it--not just the sex but for you because you're worth working for.

To catch a man like that you have to be very, very different from the other girls. So, be very, very different from the other girls and that includes not getting sucked in by his charms. Beware, though, men like this want what they can't have, then often times, when they finally get it, they move on to the next girl they can't have.

Just my two cents!

^^ Always look for their ACTIONS. they speak louder than words. Don't be pulled in with words.
Always have your interests! Always.

I'm sure I'm different in some way LOL. He pretty much thinks I'm weird....but in a good way....I don't obsess over him. I do my thing and he does his thing....most of our conversations are the same I have with my other close friends....except the added jokes and innuendoes..I don't ask who his new flavor might be...if he even has one...and vice versa. When we are together never a rush....just completely relaxing. Thank you for the added comments....if nothing else......I know I have a true friend in him. I tell him everything.....of.course after he's dine his share of probing at me until I share....he likes to listen to whatever I'd happening in my life.....funny...now I know he can't help....but be curious....LOL

Im glad you found a good friend. Honestly, these days we should have a phermone perfume that makes men want to commit. No more running from good women.