Tough times

I posted a thread before about Aquarius man from what I experienced with my Aquarius man.
Here is another hard experience I have just gained. Although, It will need more time to come conclusion which I'll tell you later once I know the truth.

Current situation, he told me he loves me and I told him I love him. We work in same company different department. Both of us are really good at our jobs, and if one of us leave the company, that could push the company to a hard time.

As an Aries, I dedicate 110% to my job and I'm not interested in gossip or rumor in office. Unfortunately, there is few other people made up stories about me (started 6 months ago) without me knowing it (I don't pay attention to those). My Aquarius man knows about those since other people wanted him to know to separate us. The worst thing is that he believed in those stories. That makes a lot of sense of a time he avoiding me.

Finally, things kept getting worse, there is another girl got in trouble same as mine and she came to me and told the whole story. I were upset and quit my job and told Aquarius man that I couldn't believe that he could jump to conclusion without seeking the truth, since he's in a position that he should not believe in any rumor. It's easy to understand for his misunderstanding because that rumor started by his very best friend (a female). I understand that if he believe me which mean he has to against his best friend.

I told him that he don't have to believe me and just let me collect evidence to prove that I'm clean. And, I told him that "we" are over, and I asked him not to contact me or talk to me anymore. I made myself clear to him that I don't want pushing him to choose me or his friend, so I rather choose to leave.

He called, texted and emailed me to say sorry. I told him I don't trust him. After days of convincing me to come back to work and he's truly sorry, I still don't trust him, but I decide go back to work to arrange my job. The last time he apologized, I can feel that he's sincere and he wants to make thing up for me, to gain my trust again.

The answer that I want to find out is that if he's truly sorry, and if he truly believe in me (I read something that it's hard for Aquarius trust someone). I'm half way of giving up on him, but I would like to see if he still lies to me on this last chance, because I still don't know if he do all the begging things just for me not to leave my job or he's truly care about me.

Thought? Advic

I am also and Aries with lots of experience with Aqua males. Here's the deal, this guy acted in a cowardly manner. It doesn't necessarily mean that he is a horrible person but, he is shown himself not be trustworthy. Perhaps, in time you can build trust with him again.

Posted by firewaterearthpiscesvenus
I am also and Aries with lots of experience with Aqua males. Here's the deal, this guy acted in a cowardly manner. It doesn't necessarily mean that he is a horrible person but, he is shown himself not be trustworthy. Perhaps, in time you can build trust with him again.

good one, fireearth 🙂

aqua or not, most woman will be UPSET and pissed off when a man goes cowardly and runs. Even if it HURTS you, he needs to tell you he don't want you or at least don't want to have a relationship. He is afraid! So just leave him be and let him be afraid. It will only upset your balance.

It's interesting you say this because quite recently similar thing happened to me so I'll give you an Aqua perspective on work gossip.

I love gossip! I don't talk about it nor to I think too much on the actual gossip but it's interesting for me to gauge into social interactions between two people when they are with each other and without in the workplace. I take anything said to me with a grain of salt even coming from my best friend. It's not that I don't value what other people say but it's their version of the 'truth'. How people act and say or how they really are is completely up to me. What I tend to hate is when the said coworkers try to get me to agree with them.

Deep down inside yes it does sort of affect how I view people depending on what people have told me, I believe nothing can really help this but in understanding psychologically how gossip spread and how group mentality works it's much easier to just forget about what people say.

I gather you must've sensed some mistrust coming from his end and my advice here is to either ask him about it or not (unless he told you outright). It may simply be his way of dealing with the information he's received. You're right though because it does break the trust you had in someone. I think in cases like these it's more what you're willing to do rather than hanging on what the other person wants to do but that's just a personal opinion, I'd rather not let others dictate my feelings or decisions even if I do think about them.

How's this for a work rumour: Virgal I hooked up with a year ago from work who I fooled around with but figured out I couldn't do the deed with her spent some time with my pisces girl. Know for a fact now that the reason why my pisces girl went quiet for a couple of weeks was because the Virgal had said I manipulated her into sleeping with me then dumped her because it's who I am and how I am with girls. And to think I had nothing but good things to say about this Virgal! What I CAN understand is how my pisces may be affected by this, but I just have to believe she'll work her shit out, I'm not about to go changing my attitude on the basis that she may think poorly of me because she hasn't said that to me yet (infact quite the opposite). She did fish for answers and I simply said "You can think whatever you want to think of me, I can't change how you want to define me but there's only the one side of me that I'm showing you and that is me".

I think what it boils down to with gossip is how you respond to it. That says more about your character than what is actually being said. You can't control the action (gossip) but you can control the reaction.

If you're not concerned about it and keep trucking along, other people will realize there's most likely no truth to it. So just ignore it. Just live right and proper during those days and keep your nose to the grindstone.

Like Metoo said, the more you try to prove your innocence the more guilty you are going to look. It will appear as if you were covering all your bases as you went along so you could eventually bail yourself out when you needed to. I hope that makes sense.

As far as gossip goes, it is the one creating it that is the immature fool. I have always believed that when you KNOW someone is talking about you (and this is good practice for work relationships anyway), always give complements and talk good about the person who is stabbing you in the back. Make it sincere so it doesn't come out fake. Then, when they go talking about you, people think "well, she (you) only has good things to say about you (the gossiper)" and it makes the gossiper look petty and unprofessional.

Then, there are times, when gossipers have to be stopped and things can get dramatic. This is when my scorpio placements and instincts come in useful! lol!

Thank you for your advices 🙂

I were thinking a lot about this Aquarius man recently. I just couldn't understand.
He was really open to me. He shared stories about his life, family, problems of his family, his plan and his dreams with me. He even cried in front of me when he broke down. He told me he's happy to be with me. He made plan which includes me in it. He said he knew me. But in the end, he believed in rumor about me (that rumor said that i'm a 2 faces person who slept around with all the guys in the office).

I don't care about the rumor. All I care about is that I finally opened up myself and shared things with him. Then, he broke my heart. He said he will make it up for me. And the question in my mind is all about if it's another lie.

Maybe, he stopped "liking" me from the first rumor already. Should I ask him if he still likes me? Should I just walk away? Or, give him another chance? Will it be another chance for him to prove himself or it will be another chance for him to break my heart again?

😢 I'm sorry about this..

*hugs funkygal* Apologies are for when you think you've done something wrong and I don't think you did in this case.

I hold a great deal of empathy for you given what I just went through and it might be our difference in tackling the issue. I felt all the things that you did. It really disgusted me to learn what people can say for whatever reason and it made me reflect on my own actions but what was important is that I was very disappointed with the person that may or may not have believed the rumour that it shook whatever trust I had in her.

Maybe I did want to see things through rose-tinted glasses. All my intuitions turned out to be right and she proved this when she opened up about it much like what your aqua is doing now. The fact is because my feelings for her were so strong that I felt I had to be consistent, even if I felted I was wronged I need to prove to her that what I've been showing her all along was the real me and I stuck to it. I just had to make myself believe that she wouldn't think that I was some kind of manslut and after evaluation of my own actions I can say without a doubt I never came across to her like that.

I guess my perseverance worked and she did apologise. In my trusting of her and letting her decide I was able to feel better because I made the right call for myself to trust her and there's my advice. For him to gain your trust back you must believe he can do it otherwise no matter how you dice it any actions of his can always be perceived as dishonesty.

Thank you, aquasnoz 🙂

I decided to give him a chance. His work has been rough recently, that made me feel bad when I were be hard on him about those rumor. 😢