Insecure cancer guy

Hello lovely cancers of DXP

This is my first post in this forum. And I am looking for some help here. I have been dating this cancer guy for more than an year now, well long story short this is the history of our relationship

-we met 2 years back when he had a gf. We went on 2 dates n ended things because he was not able to break up with her.
-after 9 months he contacted me, we met again and started seeing each other.
- and after 5 months he ended things with her.
- so after 16 months we finally became official and we have been going strong ever since.
-I moved in with him last summer and it was amazing.
-I moved out and joined uni to finish my post grad.
-and now we are in a long distance

well thats it. I have left out a lot of details the real story was actually complicated.Now the problem is this same guy who used to be so cool about everything has become insecure and controlling in the past few weeks. Last month I went on a trip with one my girlfriends for about a week and he constantly kept checking on me either accusing me or taunting me of cheating on him. And when I would confront him he would just tell him he was joking.At first I took it in a light way but it got too much. I asked him do you trust me? he said ya and he was like I just care about you. I told him I have never cheated on anyone. And I don't fool around with other guys. I was just meeting my school friend after 5 years and he started putting her down saying stuff about her.

I am so repelled by his insecurity. He has never been like this before. We have nt spoken for days now. I don't feel like talking to him.I told him so many times there is nothing to worry about. But I really don't know how to deal this.

So my question is how do I deal with this in a mature way? We have been through a lot together. But I feel so distant. I don't want to hurt him. But am I being unreasonable?

So you had an affair with this guy before luring him away from his girlfriend. And now you're looking for love advice? He's insecure because a) he knows he cheated on his ex b) he knows he chosen a woman who will be a party to a triangle and c) said woman is now at uni and can see/screw around with any guy she likes. He doesn't trust you. Neither do I. What you did was violate girl code and "what goes around comes around."

And just because you *really* wanted to fuck him doesn't make what you did right. No woman wants those tables turned on her. And when it happens to you, it will hurt like hell b/c you'll know you earned it.

Hey hey hey... No No No. We went on one date he told me he was seeing someone but it was not serious. Second time we met co incidently while I was on a trip and I asked him again. He had not broken up with her. We never had sex. We lost contact for 9 months. I told you I left out a lot of details. He did not cheat on her with me. But yes he was seeing a few other women while he was with that girl.

Okay fine but waiting in the wings is still creepy. And he dated others in addition to screwing her & buttering you up. Yeah this guy sounds like a real winner.