Hello brajs and brajettes! PG13

Let me preface this by saying I am not sure if this is the right place to post this... seeing as I am a Virgo. Honestly Im usually a lurker and read up on my own laughable experiences here and learn through others.

Just so you have some info - b/c of course this is a guy question (sorry if you rolled your eyes here....) - he is a super DUPER watery Gemini (Aquarius rising, Gem sun, Scorpio moon and Cancerian venus) and Im a somewhat chill airy Virgal (Aquarius rising, Virg sun, Leo moon, Libra venus) if you all want the houses and all that, I have that too.

We met the beginning of January and got tight very fast. Hung out everyday for the majority of the day. I was passive towards him bc I wasnt sure what would happen status wise (I just ended a relationship, well I guess not JUST, it was Halloween/early November w/ a clueless Aries) so I just wanted someone to go out with and take it from there. We met online. The swiping app...yeah you know the one.

I thought this would be a cas badaboom kind of deal and progress into friendship....I was a little skittish at first bc he won me over with his charm and I didnt want to be confused. I settled my mind and decided that I wanted to go full throttle if you know what I mean.... so we hung out at his place and things for the first couple weeks got hot and heavy and my hesitation was that I was properly "groomed" but the make outs were A++++. I get that under control and Im ready ladies and gentleman but suddenly... he pauses in the makeout and physically ices over but opens up about himself. I was not expecting this and was kind of thrown off my game bc Im used to guys moving forward once Im in their bed. So we talk and learn more about each other and then after awhile.... I go home? Confused but ok. This becomes our routine, we go out, we cuddle and then talk.

He takes a business trip. Brings me back a souvenir. Our lines get crossed and something happens with both of our phones where I think he thinks Im ignoring him but Im not. We move passed that. I start doing things with him non-sexual that I typically dont do - facetiming, which I hate, initiating texts and calls (Im ok with this if I like someone) and showering with him but still SEX DOESNT HAPPEN.

At some point I think he perhaps wants me to be more vocal or communicative so I start saying what I want and touching him and asking him what he wants me to do to him and to have him show me etc and still...nothing. I know hes turned on bc hes hard and breathing hard so what. Is. Up?

Now I kind of feel meh. The convo is passive now. The hanging out has gone down drastically but as far as I know our schedules are still the same. He tells me that his work life shifts & that his mom is kind of going through something so I fall back. We both still reach out but its not like it was.

I am beginning to seek out others but I still want him. I called him out on it & he says he likes me & wants to be fair to me bc he ended an awk engag

Awkward engagement. We talked about feelings etc and Im TOTALLY all right with no labels and just seeing where it goes but I feel like hes more in like with me than I am (not trying to humble brag) but I want him to know that Im ok...on Wednesday we hang out and Im thinking, yes! Its going to happen and NO it does not and he says its bc he doesnt want to hurt me (paraphrasing) in case I start liking him more and thats something he expressed would maybe be an issue.

So basically Im wondering if anyone else has had an experience like this or has insight bc although I like him and want to see what happens, Im kind of confused why hes told me now about three times that he likes me, different occasions and different conversations, but now hes pulled back.

I told him that I like him as well and in my mind Im like ok great! Now we've established that lets bone and see what happens. ... He seems to be hesitant and Im wondering if HE doesnt want to fall hard if its GOOD and now hes back in his feelings (thinking of the Cancer Venus here).

As I stated he ended an awkward relationship that was a failed engagement with other drama that he shared with me and prior to me he was fooling around with a MILF but that ended awhile ago.

So if there are any words of peace or insight, again, they are more than welcome! How can I show him that Im a pretty cool chick (though this has been established by him and myself haha) and would basically go with the flow....not gonna lie sometimes I would pause with his advances bc Im an overthinker (Virgo.......ugh) but that was only bc my ladybits werent to my liking for intimacy when he was coming on strong so I would stop him from going into the abyss... (ladies thats a warning to always be prepared...haha) so that may also be giving him pause and making him think Im being more emotional than I am/was....my subtle and shifting awkwardness dammit! I prefer a more aggressive partner which he seemed to be at first but now isnt showing those same signs. Ive also mentioned this to him and he has no response.... anyway....

Thanks Gems!

Maybe he has a tiny dick and has stage fright.

Posted by LadyNeptune
Maybe he has a tiny dick and has stage fright.

*Howling with laughter* Oh no.... Ive seen it & played around with it! Is it an Anaconda? Heck no, but it is nicely shaped and a decent size. Nothing to cry about.


Good one lol

Posted by Kjk62
Of course! He's a gem sun scorp moon...
Well you got your work cut out for ya.

Based on your icon I see a Scorpio moon..... YOU above all others need to help me sir!

Also to add - hes a Taurus/Cusp baby.

Posted by Kjk62
I kinda got lost in that long original post... lol
What exactly am I helping with?

Ha! Im gonna hope that thats a good thing lol.

I guess I just want to know why would you, lets say hypothetically, come on strong to a gal and then back off. Mind you, all the while telling her that you like her and that you want to be fair to her and her feelings but also that you I guess are emotionally vulnerable?

Thats kind of what I pick up with him. Have you ever done that to someone? Hes still communicative but not as much as before. Some days hes super chatty Cathy and others its meh so I dont know how to ... react? Should I fall back or keep on keeping on? What would essentially make you trust someone I guess is the ultimate question. Since you seem to have the same placements. I get that hes had a crappy experience with someone he thought was gonna be the One but that clearly didnt work out....but I wasnt expecting to delve that deep with him. It just happened *shrug*.

Posted by Kjk62
I can understand the whole hot/cold charade that's going on though. Casual flirting and talk dating is a great outlet for me when the gem in me wants to chase girls but the scorpio moon doesn't like being too close where you become too "vulnerable". ,
I feel like I've definately put girls in your situation in the past.It's kinda embarrassing, I remember in highschool there were multiple times that I would just be like "ehh fuck it"
Straight cold turkey stop talking to a girl that had the impression we were dating.
Personally, I chalk it up to 50% (to my shame) I'm an opportunist … and 50% free spirit.

Damn lol thats rough! I told him I think last week "nevermind" because I felt I was doing the most and felt like we had a disconnect so I wasnt going to carry on a charade with him. I had deleted him from my phone, all photos etc and then a bit later he responded back that he liked me but just didnt want to confuse his feelings because of his last relationship that he was relatively out of. I didnt know what to say to that honestly but I replied that I understood bc I also had just left a relationship with an Aries that was SUPER just NO. No words even for it. We started up again but as I previously said it wasnt like it was before. He seems... reserved more so now or distant but still kind of there.

Meh thats why I was reaching out here because there's definitely something about him that has be a little hooked!

Posted by Kjk62

Posted by Q_AiryVirgo

Posted by Kjk62
I kinda got lost in that long original post... lol
What exactly am I helping with?

Ha! Im gonna hope that thats a good thing lol.

I guess I just want to know why would you, lets say hypothetically, come on strong to a gal and then back off. Mind you, all the while telling her that you like her and that you want to be fair to her and her feelings but also that you I guess are emotionally vulnerable?

Thats kind of what I pick up with him. Have you ever done that to someone? Hes still communicative but not as much as before. Some days hes super chatty Cathy and others its meh so I dont know how to ... react? Should I fall back or keep on keeping on? What would essentially make you trust someone I guess is the ultimate question. Since you seem to have the same placements. I get that hes had a crappy experience with someone he thought was gonna be the One but that clearly didnt work out....but I wasnt expecting to delve that deep with him. It just happened *shrug*.

Hmm... it's a tough code to crack. Scorpio moon gives the depth emotional and the gemini sun broadens thise horizons. Safe to say, he's fairly sensitive and values the alone time. Lol.
What are the houses?

click to expand

Give me like 5 minutes and Ill have it.