Not so nice!

Do you think it's wrong to be nice to people?
Do you believe, "Being nice = weakness".
Do you dislike nice people?
Do you find difficult people attractive?
How often do you snap at people(outside your family)?

No, I do not think it is wrong to be nice to people.

Being nice = weakness - depends on the situation - if your actions are to please someone else but go against your beliefs, yes because you are not being truthful to yourself or to the other person.

No, I do not dislike nice people = I like everyone actually!

Do I find difficult people attractive? no, not really. Again, depends on the situation and why they are being difficult. If they are being difficult to purposely harm or hurt someone - that is not an attractive quality to me. I see no point in it.

I don't snap at people.


Good questions Mel!

I think so. I'm really nice on the inside, but I at an age where I find that being nice just sucks. I often have to hide my natural tendencies b/c this world or at least my world just doens't allow it. Also, being nice and considerate just amounts to a lot of hurt when others don't reciprocate it. I also think it is perceived as a sign of weakness by the majority of the world. For example, a person who yells at everyone will have the ppl around them being very careful b/c they're fearful of that person's wrath. A nice person will generally be taken advantage of since they never show anger. I am friends with a Pisces, and a mutual friend of ours always asks him for money and he always give it. I was asked once, I said no and the person stopped asking me, which is exactly what I wanted. But, since this Pisces friend can't say no, the mutual friend just keeps asking, asking, and asking... I want to stand up for my Pisces friend and just tell the other person to back off on the borrowing sh!t, but I don't want to over step my boundaries, I mean I'm not his mother/father...

To answer your last three questions:

3) I love nice girls, I am at a stage where I prefer personality over aesthetics. As long as the girl isn't 2 ugly, I'm completely fine with it. I believe if the emotional attraction is there, the physical attraction follows easily.

4) I don't find difficult ppl attractive, although I know so many girls who stay in destructive relationships for reasons that are beyond my comprehension. It's always some BS about invested time, effort, and history. Hey maybe everyone should learn about Sunk costs (as in accounting). Seriously, if something is bad for you, then stop doing it... How f u c k i n g difficult is that?

5) I use to snap at my parents quite a bit when I was younger, not so much anymore... I tend to (although seldomly) snap at selfish ppl who don't do their part in group work. I also snap at ppl who delibrately try to damage my life.

6) This site is truly amazing at filtering words...

1)Depends on if it's a situation that is the persons an a** who's just out to fcuk with people it's okay to be mean.If theres no given reason not to be nice sure it's not wrong.

2)I think it's a weakness to not be nice because of whatever reason;ego,pride,etc.etc.Basically if your not threatened by something why see a problem with being nice.

3)Depnds on what type of "nice" your refering to,if you mean brownnosers no because they aren't sincere and are usually out to get something as a gain of some type and aren't really "nice".A genuinely nice person yeah how just happens to be frindly,outgoing,etc.,etc. is fine though.

4)Depends on what type of "difficult" your refering to.Someone who's always negative without a reason no I don't like;pessimism,mindgames,jealous,possesive,emotionally draining,low self esteem,insecurity causing them to test,etc.,if it's something like they're just shy,cautious or reserved I can work with.Also depends on if I have the energy and patience for that particular person and if there was anything to give me a reason to keep trying=softer side underneath type thing.

5)Not to often but I have due to bad days that I really don't mean or they do something to me and I do mean it.Basically all of these answers are related to underlining motives the people have.I hang out with all different types of people.

Do you think it's wrong to be nice to people? No, it's not wrong to like nice people. But I think it's wrong to eat nice people (without a good Chardonnay ).

Do you believe, "Being nice = weakness".
Being nice is not a weakness. Being nice without common sense is. You can be nice and still know when to give some people a little tough love, or an outright cold shoulder.

Do you dislike nice people?
I think nice people are GREAT (especially with a good Chardonnay). Seriously, I like nice people- but I hate watching some of them get taken advantage of.

Do you find difficult people attractive?
I agree with Tia- depends on what you mean by "difficult". Some people are a little rough around the edges, but have a good heart underneath. Then there are some people who just jerks, and don't know how to treat others. I'm not a fan of the latter.

How often do you snap at people(outside your family)?
To be honest, I don't know. I don't think very often- but my perception of how I am- is different from what others my think. I try not to snap at others because it's not constructive- and if I'm upset- or having a bad day.. it's easier for me to stay quiet..or be somewhat detached.

This topic is very close to me as I hate that people take kindness for weakness...Why is that anyway?

Isn't it harder to give or share with someone your last rather than to keep it to yourself?

Isn't it harder to hold your temper and try to discuss things rationally rather than fly off the handle?

Isn't it easy to say no?

I have always found myself in situations where people do not appreciate niceness because they grew up in an environment with no love or kindness. Therefore it is inherent within them to treat the "kind" person as weak because they don't see the true strength it takes to be kind.

someone asked me one time would i rather be nice or kind? I have a terrible habit of being toooo nice I never say NO, but lately I have been really trying not to do things for people that I really don't want to. I guess kind is only helping when you can and really want to, where being nice is always doing things for others even when u really can't, but still do and U put your own life on hold all the time.
Difficult people depends on why I guess but if that's what their personality is always like then I do not find that attractive in any way.
Being kind isn't being weak, either is being nice just depends on how far you take it, we need kind people in this world wouldn't it suck if we were all selfish and only cared about ourselves.

I don't snap at people very often unless they are really being rude or treating me badly or if they are doing it to someone I care about.

"I have always found myself in situations where people do not appreciate niceness because they grew up in an environment with no love or kindness. Therefore it is inherent within them to treat the "kind" person as weak because they don't see the true strength it takes to be kind."

Perhaps I am one of them. Sometimes I do find very kind people a little stupid. Maybe it is because of what you said "They don't see the true strenght it takes to be kind".