Stressed to the MAX!

Profile picture of BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
@BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
15 YearsPisces

Comments: 2 · Posts: 56 · Topics: 6
Ugh....
The day, that I am worry-free, stress-free, aniexty-free, debt-free, problem-free, just free!
I felt the feeling of having this today.
Goosebumps arose.
I saw the beautiful ocean.
I was free.
Now, that thought/feeling has passed.

Today, was just not the day.
Not the day for me to be doing ANYTHING BUT RELAXING & RESTING.

(Rewind 2 months ago)
June 1, 2011- ENOUGH IS ENOUGH AND IVE HAD ENOUGH.
I kicked out my "friend"/roomate. Leo. Thinks the world is his. Thinks that all he has to do is show up & hi converation and companioship is enough. Thinks everyone likes him. Has absolutely nothing to talk about. Horrible roomate & way too self aborbed for me.

Anywho, gave him the boot! Yay!

:::Man down:::

Also, June 1 2011
Broke up with Libra BF. Thinking of him really makes me sick. WTF, was I thinking. Obviously, I wasnt.

Reason why I fell for this fool.
- lonely
- wanted attention
- needed affection
- wanted someone around.

Wrong MOVE.

Libra- great in bed. pretended to have things going. very sneaky. not affectionate. not attentive. no goals. excuses. playing basketball with friends.

EWWW.

Anyways, ::: Man Down:::

I decided On JUNE 1 2011 ALOT NEEDED TO CHANGE.
In order for change to happen, I had to cancel whoever contract that had no value.

Gosh, as a pisces we put up with soooo much shit for people. why? because we dont like to hurt peoples feelings. Fuck that, look what they are doing to you. I had to adopt another attitude.
If you have nothing to offer than kick rocks & shit bricks.
I was tired of carrying others weight for what?
I was tired of the excuses.
I was tired of the take take attitude.
Tired of people walking all over me.
Tired of people using me for what i could provide.

So sick of these so called friends. Thinking becaue i got, they do.
Nope. Wrong move.

Ive been through alot, lost my sister when i was 18 & moved to NYC when I was 20 alone.
IVE BEEN THRU HELL & BACK, I CAN HOW YOU VOCHURES. Came to nyc to persue my dreams & quickly got sucked into another world.
One of unhappiness, partying, drinking, drugs, & in the end lonlieness.

Meet a taurus guy, who, at first, rocked my world, that was until, i gave up all power and control and moved in......
OH BOY DID HE MELT MY HEART.
WITH: jealously,hate,envy,abuse...

Hmmm, he "saved" me from my partying days & made me a better stronger woman.

Thanks BITCH!

:::Man Down:::

Anywho, today all these past



Profile picture of BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
@BeautifulPiscesDollNYC
15 YearsPisces

Comments: 2 · Posts: 56 · Topics: 6
ANYWHO: all these past emotions came to the surface today.

I COULDNT DEAL.

I needed someone bad.

Called Mom, no answer.

UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Thoughts: I have no real friends who dont use me, who actually get me. I wish my sister alive, here with me, life would be so perfect. I need to be successful. I need to be a millionaire. I need change. I cant keep living like this. I need oppurtunities. Something has to give. Someone give me a chance. Pleae help.I need it. Please. I want to be free.

Why hasnt he called?
Why am i so hard on myself?
When is it going to happen?
How?

I finally calmed myself down then that's when I had that ocean vision. The feeling of being free.


Loved it!!!!!

I need to accomplish it.
First i must stop stressing.

Have you ever wanted something so bad?
I do. & It kills me that i am not as successful a i should be.
It kills me to worry.
It kill me to not be free of all negavative thingss.

Im totally into postive thinking=positive results.

but TODAY.

WAS NOT THE DAY.

IM OK NOW.
I JUST HOPE & PRAY THAT ALL MY DREAM ARE MET NOW, LIKE RIGHT NOW.

ARE PISCES IMPATIENT?
I'm trying to get to know myself.

WHAT ARE PISCES PEOPLE LIKE?
I OFTEN LOOK UP FAMOUS PICESES SO I CAN DEVELOPE THE AME TREGNTH THEY HAD TO SUCCEED.

GOD, I NEED CHANGE.