does scorpio possessiveness=love?

Posted by yofaithful
or are they just possessive in general?

Posted by ceu

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by ceu
Possessiveness is a result of fear and insecurity. When you love someone, you understand that that person is responsible for their own actions and words. That person's life is his or her own.

That person is free to love you and also free to leave the relationship. Possessive people attempt to limit their partners freedom and control their partner's behavior, often through emotional manipulation.

In turn, however, if you love someone who has insecurities, isn't it your duty to allay those fears and insecurities somewhat? That's not to say you need to bend over backwards to stroke their egos, but simple reassurance may be enough? Shouldn't you also examine your own behavior to determine if there is something you are doing to create insecurity?


Certainly at some point too much insecurity is a problem. But before complaining about the possessiveness spawned from insecurity, perhaps one needs to examine why this person is feeling insecure and if maybe you might be creating some of that insecurity.

It's easy to blame the other person and ignore our own behavior.

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In my opinion, it is not anyone's duty to allay the fears and insecurities of another person.

Again, in my opinion, a person's only duties are NOT to encourage those fears and insecurities by behaving in ways and saying things that arouse and feed those insecurities. And secondly, by NOT taking advantage of what is known to be an obvious weakness in the other person in order to harm him or her emotionally.

Reassurance comforts the insecurity and tells the person to feel comfortable in being insecure because someone will say, "no, no it's alright."

Reassurance does not challenge the insecurity and does ask that the person face, head on, their fears. When people are insecure and afraid they hold back and hide. They do not open their hearts fully to you.

Because the insecurity persists that person needs to be reassured time and time again. It is an inevitable cycle. And woe, if it becomes your job and responsibility to reassure him or her. Or if you desire that from your partner.

A person's fears and insecurities are theirs, NOT yours. The work of facing them and making peace is theirs, NOT yours.

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by cunninglinguist

Posted by Rabbit
To be fair though...that's just me. I'm not saying anyone's wrong.

There's like...126.4 and a half billion people on earth...and not one of them knows everything

Btw, good to see you back. We may not see eye to eye on certain issues, but that's just the way the cookie crumbles sometimes. 😛 Glad you seem to be feeling better.

To be fair...children is a subject I will fight tooth and nail over. I will bite your throat out if I have to.

My frustration with that thread was what I perceived as an inability to recognize all the factors that need to be considers before just bouncing.

If you find out its not yours 5 or 6 years down the road, that's a tough call. I'd like to think any man would recognize the importance of keeping a father figure in that child's life. Even if financially you're not on the hook, even if you're not with the mother, I think you stay on that child's life somehow. Besides, is it good to have a philandering man be the only male influence?

On the other hand... Say a black couple get rushed to the hospital and in the delivery room, that baby comes out whiter than Glen Beck in a snowstorm? I have no issues with that dude saying "Uh...bye bye, hoe!"

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Posted by Rabbit
There's always the genetic possibility depending on genes in the past. There was a white couple not long ago that had a black baby too. DNA showed it was in fact their child.

I was trying to add levity.

Posted by Rabbit

Posted by PhoenixRising

Posted by Rabbit
There's always the genetic possibility depending on genes in the past. There was a white couple not long ago that had a black baby too. DNA showed it was in fact their child.

I was trying to add levity.

I know, I guess I was just pointing out that some time still needs to spent to adequately assess what is what rather than just run (sort of agreeing with you--I didn't see the whole thread). I know some men that wouldn't wait for the DNA sample.

Now what if she actually DID give birth to Glen Beck though?

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Posted by Rabbit
There's always the genetic possibility depending on genes in the past. There was a white couple not long ago that had a black baby too. DNA showed it was in fact their child.

I was trying to add levity.