Ever had to lock up love to maintain friendship?

This Libra thing from my other post is bugging me. I know I value the friendship but at the same time I hate how I have to lock up love to do it. I didn't have walls for him because the foundation of the relationship was from our friendship. (I was naive of course). Thus, I allowed myself to feel, show, tell my emotions without inhibition or doubt. UNTIL, of course the infamous fickle nature of Libras that everyone loves talking about. I know myself quite well, that in order for me to even consider his request to be friends, I must really care for him. I usually cut all ties when rejection or betrayal happens to me in any relationship (friendship or romantic relationships).

Has anyone ever done this? I've never had to do this-- and it's a pain in the butt. I don't know If this post even makes sense--my emotions are just all whacked out right now. 😢

I couldn't do it.if I were in love,and it was not a situation where it was reciprocated and we would be together I'd have to cut him loose.Even with my Pisces moon,I don't like torture.😉

I am sorry you're going thru this though.it sucks 😢

If I love someone, they know it. And like Bells, I would take so much of it before I had my fill. Only hurt for so long before the ice crept up and I cut things loose. The pillow can only hold so many tears.

I think it depends on the person and circumstances. I can be friends w/exes; however, there DOES need to be a reasonable amount of time that passes. With that being said, there are only 2 of my exes that I'm friends with (one is my ex-fiance' since we know so much about one another). As GemTaur, I'm good at cutting people out of my life. Not saying that's a good trait, but I'm very proficient at it! I don't care who it is - family, friend, ex man, they can go buh' bye! It may seem heartless but once it gets to that point, trust me, they aren't even worth holding on to for friendship sake.

Seeing Red, since you are still in the beginning phases of this situation, I think you should distance yourself from this person. I KNOW it will be hard, but it sounds like you will need to do that in order to move on. And, just an fyi, almost every Libra I know can NOT stand to be ignored/silent treatment...just food for thought 😉

I suppose I'll test drive it. But if it becomes unhealthy where I let it consume me---I would have to concede to my normal acts of cutting people off. That would be quite unfortunate, since he was a very close friend. My inner close circle of friends would dwindle to a meager 2 people (ahahah).

Posted by USCTaurusGal
And, just an fyi, almost every Libra I know can NOT stand to be ignored/silent treatment...just food for thought 😉

I know this. Many of my friends are Libras. 2, including him happen to be my close friend out of 3.

Although playing that game is tempting--- I'd rather he seek me with his own will and not because I've orchestrated a mind game for him to play.

Posted by SeeingRed

Posted by USCTaurusGal
And, just an fyi, almost every Libra I know can NOT stand to be ignored/silent treatment...just food for thought 😉

I know this. Many of my friends are Libras. 2, including him happen to be my close friend out of 3.

Although playing that game is tempting--- I'd rather he seek me with his own will and not because I've orchestrated a mind game for him to play.

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OH NO, I wasn't suggesting you play any games at ALL! I was just saying that when you leave and/or stop talking to him he is gonna go crazy, because they just can't stand that! No, I prefer no games. I'm too old for games, and I really try not to prescribe to any games - even though I know it's a natural part of some peoples dating process; it doesn't work for me. I was mainly saying that while you are feeling like crap right now, that trust me if you start to move on and are not accessible and/or ignore him to strengthen YOU, he will not be able to take that!

Cuttiebullie---What I meant by test drive is that I would test drive this whole being friends even though I love him. I don't like mind-games; it's too much mental work to do. But, I did a lot of thinking today. Here's what I posted in the Libra forum lol:

"I'm going to stand my ground and decided that the way he handled the situation was a douche bag move. I'm not saying he's a douche bag and I don't hate him. But I have to be fair to all my close friends and do what I would do if it had been another close friend, which is keep myself at a distance. Go M.I.A-status on him. If he wants friendship, then he must initiate it. Friendship in my case must be earned and proven because I know the extent I would go for for a close friend.

So thank you all for your insights. He became fickle, somewhere in the timeframe he became uncertain. And right now, I don't need to be with someone who is uncertain of what they want when I am certain of what I want, at least currently."

I didn't think it would be fair to give him preference over my other close friends who work very hard to continue being my friend because I love him. =)