feeling obligated

I have posted this on other boards, but I have a 17mth old little girl with a taurus men we are not together but we still have a pretty good relationship. We never really ended things I guess you could say we kinda just drifted apart and went on with our lives but still keep in contact for visits for the baby and so forth or if he wanted or I needed him to get things for her nothing to major just parenting things. Well Thursday he got from out of town and he lost his wallet which has his ID, debit card and so forth in their so he call me and ask me for a big favor that could I lend him $ 100 until he got his birth certifcate since he was born in texas so he could get a new ID and get all his banking stuff straight, I am the type of person where if I can help I will no problem (taurus Moon) so I told him I would and so I did that for him. So I am currently single since I broke up with a sagg I was dating so yesterday the unthinkable happen we had sex, we hadn't had sex in over a year and I was at home and he txt me to see what we were doing I told him he could come over and then it happen. I know all this time we both still had feelings under the surface but we were trying to move on with our lives so now I hope he doesn't feel like he was obligated to have sex with me now I am thinking how it this going to change things between us.

I had to post this here to see what you taurus think, We are always going to be apart of each other lives but sex complicate things and I am just confuse of what my next step should be...........

Yup, He still has feelings for you. May even still be in love with you.....@ helpplease is right, once we are over you sex is NEVER going to happen again!!! Point Blank

The way he was kissing my lips and neck it was so senusal, I was thinking oh boy this going to mean more than just sex.

Why are you here asking when you can ask HIM how he feels about it? Straight from him is better than wondering and it driving you nuts, no?

Posted by NZAqua
Why are you here asking when you can ask HIM how he feels about it? Straight from him is better than wondering and it driving you nuts, no?

I can, I will, I just needed to get that out and at this point it's kinda weird because I don't know what I want yet.

Posted by helpplease
His actions says it all no point of asking. It will be best if you observe and wait til he questions you about what you both have which im sure it will happen any time soon.

See this is more along the lines of what I am planning on happening, I know we rush last time and if we decide to be an couple again I want all the work to come from him so I can know this is real to him, and not like he feels obligated because I am his baby mother or because if he needs something I will help him.

So it took sex for you to realize your unfinished feelings for him? No judgement here, I'm just saying that's kind of odd.

I think you really need to take a closer look at things. Hey, maybe you have been surpressing feelings for him & vice versa. Or maybe you're like most human beings in that sometimes we easily mistake lust/passion in the moment to be something more than what it really is.

You should have this discussion with him b/c he'll be the only & best person who can really tell you what's going on, atleast from his point of view.

I get what you're saying though. You don't want him to get the impression that you're the typical "Baby mama" who will allow him to come & go as he pleases, play with your emotions or get the "benefits" just b/c you guys are connected through your child.

In his defense though, if sex is not something you want him to continually expect from him, then you've gotta do your part & make sure that sex isn't the very thing you keep offering him. Even if you give it up 5 times a day, he's still NOT entitled to your body, BUT you wouldn't be helping your own case if you kept on giving up the benefits.

Posted by krysrenee7
So it took sex for you to realize your unfinished feelings for him? No judgement here, I'm just saying that's kind of odd.

I think you really need to take a closer look at things. Hey, maybe you have been surpressing feelings for him & vice versa. Or maybe you're like most human beings in that sometimes we easily mistake lust/passion in the moment to be something more than what it really is.

You should have this discussion with him b/c he'll be the only & best person who can really tell you what's going on, atleast from his point of view.

I get what you're saying though. You don't want him to get the impression that you're the typical "Baby mama" who will allow him to come & go as he pleases, play with your emotions or get the "benefits" just b/c you guys are connected through your child.

In his defense though, if sex is not something you want him to continually expect from him, then you've gotta do your part & make sure that sex isn't the very thing you keep offering him. Even if you give it up 5 times a day, he's still NOT entitled to your body, BUT you wouldn't be helping your own case if you kept on giving up the benefits.

Very good points.........

Thanks for your advice, I don't it will happen again until we talk about it.

^^^^ Correction, it will not happen again until we talk about our situation.........