Taurus woman has this Sag guy up all night

So, as you can probably see by my username, I'm a sag guy, and I've been reading this site for about a year now, learned a lot of valuable things, definitely glad I found it!

Anyway, my personal life has been pretty eventful the last two years, but I'll try to keep on topic as to this specific post (should be hard for a sag right). Just about two years ago, September 2010, I met a Taurus woman who actually happened to be the GF of one of my better friends. I had actually never met her or gotten to know her, we each knew who the other was but that was about it. Well, we got to know each other as friends for a week or two, then one night out with a large group of friends, while fairly intoxicated I might add, we swapped numbers, and I thought nothing else of it. Sent her a quick text the next day, some kind of joke about a hangover, and ever since then it's been a rollercoaster ride. Proceeded to just talk to her as friends for the next 2 weeks before I realized they had broken up the night we swapped numbers. Strange. Also, I had noticed that we talked almost all day every day, and the connection was amazing...it was like we were separated at birth. It was almost scary. I tried to back off when I knew they had broken up, but that didn't go so well. We continued to talk, and being a Sag, the flirting was almost unavoidable. One night, after inviting me to hang out with her close friends, we ended up kissing in the car before I got out of the car to get back to my place. Immediately after, she disappeared emotionally. Next day, saw me and acted like I wasn't there. We were supposed to hang out that weekend, but she ditched me, lied about why she left town, found out she went to hang out with someone else, slept with him, and 24 hrs later they were "FB official", I was dumbfounded. Since then, communication dropped off, I went through a couple other girls, met someone I thought was my soulmate, until she left me almost out of the blue last June. Well, a couple weeks later, who should send me a BBM during the day but the Taurus girl. We hadn't literally talked in almost 5 months, but it was like we never stopped. We started right back where we left off, until one night she admitted to me that she made a mistake picking her current bf over me. I had been waiting for this for a while, as the guy she's with now (a taurus) is really just a loud, lazy, cheat. More in second message, promise only two haha.

So anyway, this continued for a couple months, it was definitely cheating on her part if only in emotion/verbally. But she seemed so happy, we literally talked all day every day, could not get enough of eachother. Everything clicked (almost) like I've never felt before. Until one day she tells me she can't do this anymore. I understood, but I tried to get her to make a choice. That was a mistake. There was a fight, and about a week of silence. This happened a couple more times, with us trying to not flirt/be just friends, but it always ended up in both of us admitting feelings, me getting mad because she couldn't make a decision, and her disappearing for a week. The last time it happened, she said, look, not right now, but maybe in the future when we are both graduated and ready for it. Ok fine I said. We stayed friends, had a wonderful lunch date shortly before Christmas, then she disappeared for months. Wouldn't respond to anything. Finally wrote her a letter back in June, we reconnected, and have been better than ever since. Thing is, now she talks about moving in together when I get off of school, talks about going places together, travelling Europe together, and things like that. We still talk all day every day. Things are progressing like last time. And again, my feelings are strong and I can't ignore that. She constantly tells me I'm the only one she can stand to talk to for any amount of time. Either way, she seems very interested in a future together, and VERY together at that. Who just wants to live with someone they have repressed feelings for? Help? I can't take this much longer! I care for her deeply, we have a connection unlike I've ever seen, but it's getting to be too much out here without something more. A sag that wants commitment? Now you've seen it all!

what was her excuse for disappearing?

and why did she come back in june?

Well, at the time, I didn't know anymore about astrology than that it was something in the part of the paper I dont read. So none of the reasons made sense...it was very, idk, it seemed not genuine. She said basically, that he was there, and he was a known variable (my words.) and she knew him for like half her life, and so it was just easy. It wasn't that she didn't have feelings for me, but she just felt that it wasn't the right time, with her ex being a friend of mine and her living so far. In my head I heard "I took the easy way out cause I was scared", something I've heard too often from earth signs in general. She came back because, like I guessed all along, she missed me, she was always extremely attracted to me, and wished she had picked me. So its gone back and forth several times now. In fact, as I write this shes now giving me the silent treatment. Last week she was on vacation, no phone service, so we emailed each other every day. They were the most funny/flirty/heartfelt/generally entertaining things I've ever read, if you read them you'd think we were together for years. And just like that today...gone. And no of course there isn't a problem, she's perfectly fine. It's painfully obvious but I'm not going to play into it. She has a temper like no other....

Lots of coming and leaving she doesnt seem to spell out long term material. Talk to her and get to the root of her back and forthness at the end of the conversation make sure she does more staying then leaving.

I'm trying not to rock the boat at the moment, but that's the plan eventually. We also happen to be, whether for good or bad, each other's best friends, so I don't want to lose that in the meantime by bringing it up again. The problem is, she won't tell me the truth about anything in our relationship, I have to practically push her to tears and then maybe I might get the chance to pry it out with a crowbar. So I'd rather not go through that at the moment, I'm trying to gauge the situation and see what I can do. I would love if she stayed for once. Do Tauruses really value security that much?

Ever since returning from her trip, she's been very distant during the day, almost not there. Last night though she came back for a little bit. She told me she has one thing that's been on mind lately that she can't get rid of and she's trying to work it out. Won't tell me what, I have a feeling I might know. I've read that if a Taurus woman is trying to make a decision about you she won't talk to you, is that true?

Do they want security: Do not ask dumb questions

I've read that if a Taurus woman is trying to make a decision about you she won't talk to you, is that true: I've seen most need the space of thinking as the cold world tends to pile up on there warm-ish hearts.

As far as your relationship continue with the "plan" but also ask do you need space to think or can you work it out as is. Tell her what you feel as well come to a agreement minus the negativity.

As far as asking about security, I should have been more clear, thought it was implied. Basically, are they willing to forgo something they think might be better, even a lot better, if it's slightly riskier? That was kind of what I heard a year ago from her, she literally told me that her current situation was the easy choice, and that's why she chose it. Seems to go against the main point of a relationship, but I've gotten used to it. As a sag of course I don't see the point in a so-so relationship...either its amazing or its not happening. If there's something better why not do it. But I know that's opposite of how a Taurus thinks. In regards to needing space, I tried to crack that last night, and it backfired badly. As I mentioned, she's been distant as hell, and last time she did this she disappeared almost for good. I wanted to make sure that didn't happen, so I asked if I had done anything, and apologized ahead of time for it. I had felt bad because I was with some friends and wasn't responding to her as quickly as I wanted to. Well, that was a stupid idea. She got mad that I thought she was upset. I think she took it as "you don't text me enough" which is 100% not true. It's the kind of communication that we've been having that worries me, not the amount. She basically told me off, and suggested I should never do it again. Ok then. We resolved it, kind of. Obviously there's a rift. The problem is, telling her how I feel at this point might not be a wise decision, I'm worried it will push her away for good. Basically, how much influence do I have on her decision making? I feel that whatever she decides will be what she wants, and nothing I can do will change that. I've honestly never expressed my feelings for her, they've always kind of been implied by both of us. We both hate to talk about it, but it's always obviously there. Should I do it finally? Or should I just let her alone and risk her just drifting away again to avoid the whole thing? Seems like a lose-lose here. I'm tempted to do the first, just not yet.

You have allot of stuff your going to do "eventually" fear of whatever is a plug stopping you. One day you'll have to face it whether it drifts away if you don't or if it corrects itself doesn't seem to be in your hands. It's in you it seems but it keeps backfiring she seems either at her wits end, a game player or something else happened to make her this way non concluded in this thread. To come this far and have questions and answers to back them up plan wise either make a move or do not. This is up for you to gauge being that you are inside the relationship. There are numerous of things I would do but you or not me and vice versa. Choices.

It's true, I agree. She's been like this as long as I've known her, and any emotional conversation seems to exasperate her. I think this honestly is probably because it's hard to talk feelings when she's in a relationship with someone else. I know I have to, I guess I'm sick of being in limbo (my perception, not necessarily hers). Obviously she's a stubborn bull, so that makes all of it much harder. She's the type that's bad enough to tell you to your face you're wrong and don't bring it up again even if she's bleeding inside, much less if she's mulling something over in her head. So, that's discouraging. I just tried to talk to her on the phone just now, she blew up and hung up on me. So, I feel like this might be the turning point that I've faced so many times in the past but been too scared to take advantage of. I feel, at this point, I either let her know how I feel, which could be disastrous, or I just let her be and let her come back. Again. Which she will do. I guess my original question still stands...does her behavior warrant me taking a chance with this friendship like this? I feel that the things she said and the way she's acted have been definite signs that there still might be a chance, but as she said before, maybe not now. Might have to just wait it out some more, as badly as I don't want to, it's killing me.

Like I just stated in another thread patience and tolerance only last for so long. All I see are choices this is someone you love when its this serious there is no confusing youve been with person for awhile and you know them in depth. Eithier leave or go, why is it that people have a problem leaving there relations but can stay around for mothers cuddles. Eithier you're going to pour your heart out or not do shit/fallback. When a person locks up you better search with all your might for a key that reaches them. This is love the question is are you still in love. The whole thing is corny I wish you were standing here because then Id smack the hell out of you and tell you to be a man regardless if its hard stand up.

At this point, I don't know. We haven't talked since Thursday when she blew up at me for being sorry for apologizing? Who knows. I get sick of being the bad guy only to have her come back a week, a month, a year later to apologize and say I was right the whole time. When it's good its very good. When it's bad it's very bad. I guess as a sag, I'm always optimistic, and I don't hold grudges. However, I never forget. It amazes me how one day she can be spending her whole day talking to me, saying things like I want to move in with you, let's go on a trip to Europe together, let's ride motorcycles together, etc., to screaming at me for apologizing for something and hanging up on me the next. I can't really handle that. I can't ask what she's thinking when it's in flux between those two places because she'll lie and say nothing and close herself off. Might be a lost cause. I would hate that but it might be true.