Nyxx
@phEnyxBull876
11 YearsTaurus
Comments: 0 · Posts: 477 · Topics: 17
When a Taurus women orbits the Cancer man planet..
Thank you Hotbeefy!! Always love to read your insights 🙂
your posts sounds like the libra moon talking🙂 I like this calm attitude I should say
post*
Posted by TxOgal
your posts sounds like the libra moon talking🙂 I like this calm attitude I should say
You are so right! I struggle with my Libra moon a lot.
Posted by phEnyxBull876
But now that we live together, we're together in the same room, but not mentally on the same page. I can see him retreating, doing what he needs to do. So how does one handle that? Personally, I tend to ignore, do my own thing. But then he sort of still wants to connect with me, chit chat, etc, and I naturally go on the defensive. Even though I KNOW KNOW KNOW it's not about me.
He's withdrawn to charge himself back up but since you live together he can't have that physical space... but you already know this.
So while you are giving him that mental/emotional space he chit chats with you to stay connected. It's also a thank you for being understanding mixed with his own guilt of having to detach like that. Cancers really do feel guilty about not being able to give you what we know you want.
I do this with my kids, it's a constant struggle. I'll spend a couple of hours with them playing or talking. Then I have to be alone or I get irritable. They always want more, or want to continue what we're doing because we're having fun but I'm all out of energy. They can't understand why I NEED to stop. After 30 mins of alone time I feel guilty and go to check on them or make light conversation to let them know I'm still here... I can be in the same room as long as we are sharing space doing our own thing but if they start to be demanding of me to fully engage, I have to cut out again.
The Taurus gets it, he's got a 12th house Sun/Mercury so he's alone in his head within a crowd. The Gem tends to think if we're not stimulating each other I find her boring. If I articulate my feelings of why accompanied with lots of hugs, her Cancer Merc/Venus gets it. She's starting to understand that 20 mins alone in your room is not a punishment and has started to seek out that refuge herself when she starts to get crazy.
Thank you so much, Shell! The responses from your kids is especially helpful. I don't normally relate to my Gem rising, but her reaction is exactly how I feel. I'm at odds with feeling guilty, like I've let him down, and bummed because maybe I'm boring in that moment. And then I have the aha! moment where I (i.e. as the taurus rational introverted mind) know he just needs his space, but I can't check that gut reaction. I'm definitely working on this. 🙂
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I know when a Cancer is securely in his shell time, the best way to handle is just let them be, and they will return. Which is quite easy to deal with when you don't live together, and he can go to his own space and have his alone time and then return when he is ready.
However...what if you DO live together? Short of physically removing yourself, how do you give Cancer man his space in a shared environment? The following is a snapshot of the downswing in the mood cycle.
We recently had a few GREAT days. But right on schedule, after those great great highs, we're struggling with the "okay, I've had enough of you, give me my space!" :-p And I can tell he's going into his shell, focusing on projects and friends and family more because we've come out of our hibernation hole. This is all well and good. And normally, I could steer clear of taking that sudden shift of attention personally because out of sight, out of mind. But now that we live together, we're together in the same room, but not mentally on the same page. I can see him retreating, doing what he needs to do. So how does one handle that? Personally, I tend to ignore, do my own thing. But then he sort of still wants to connect with me, chit chat, etc, and I naturally go on the defensive. Even though I KNOW KNOW KNOW it's not about me.
Basically, it's like, he wants me in, but he doesn't want me in. I'm orbiting, waiting on the peripheral for full contact. LOL. How do I get a handle on that? Tips and tricks of the Cancer trade, please. It would be AMAZING to get specific Taurus feedback, someone who understands how we are when it comes to possessiveness, short tempers, etc. Or from a Cancer who has successfully been with a Taurus woman, and what's worked best for them.