Thought

When you entrust your heart to another human, it is not a light thing. Whether it goes quickly or slowly, it matters not. The heart wants what it wants.
But what do you tell it when it needs reassurance? When your otherwise seemingly placid boat is rocked over, capsized.
How do you damp down the fear, irrational or otherwise when your stomach knots and your blood runs to ice.
All the mental drivel making you feel about all of 17 again and unsure where you stand.
This is not a Taurus thing, this is a woman thing.
This is the underbelly of Taurus though. On the outside we are strong, seemingly pretty much in groove with life as a whole, but inside we are seething and full of doubts. Until we stand on that bedrock, the foundation, and set our roots in deep. To drink the water that is life itself.
I like to know exactly where I stand, that cuts a wide swathe through games and other petty nonsense that I've no time for. If you've no time, say so. If you'd rather not talk, say so. I'm a pretty simple human as far as that goes, but no games. Please.
The intensity at times is almost at a frightening level. Like harnessing the wind or a tornado. You try to focus on being the eye of the storm with everything raging around you and the sound deafening in your ears. You pray, not again, not ever again. To the pain, the mind numbingly weary ache of it. You want to go home. You want peace from it. At times you want to huddle in fetal position and weep with it, and at others throw your arms wide and laugh in the face of it.
I analyze everything to death. Try to come at it from each and every angle and must squash those little niggling fears that tease and taunt. Ghosts of things failed, whispers of mistakes. Each and every thing that makes me human I suppose. Strike and retreat. Thrust and parry. For it is very much like a sword fight.
What do you see when you look at me? There is much to examine. Like a wounded thing I bleed, red rivers coursing down, down like hellish rain. It is much to shoulder.
This is a challenge, gauntlet thrown, for battle. Do you have the guts, do you have what it takes to stand strong. To just be. I do.