Is this Aqua treating me as a friend or a fool?

I've recently made a new friend with an aqua male and I'm not too sure if he sees me as a friend or his form of entertainment.

He's a very sarcastic person and I've noticed he can come across as mean to other people. He also seems to make fun of people by pretending he likes what they are saying when he actually thinks it's stupid (part of his sarcasm). He's quite often been labled a 'jerk' by others. For some reason I never got this treatment that others seem to get. While observing from the outside I could see how others came up with these judgements but knew there was more to him than that.

Anyway when we first began talking I was very shy; so shy that I hardly spoke a word and yet he would constantly try to get me to say SOMETHING instead of nothing. After a while he began to tease me a little and call me weird nicknames but he was still nice.

At one stage he told me his friend had a crush on me and had said I was hot. He would keep bringing it up and insisting that his friend truly felt this way. I asked his friend myself and he denied it. I instantly decided that maybe this aqua was somehow making fun of the way I look. When I confronted the aqua with this conclusion he said even he himself thought I was hot...but because he's so sarcastic I wasn't sure whether to believe him or not.

He started introducing me to his friends as his mate even though I got the feeling we hadn't gotten close enough for him to think of me that way.

Then he started bringing up the topic of his friend liking me again. When I began to give his friend more attention he all of a sudden went cold. Almost like he disappeared but left his body behind..if that even makes sense... He was very short with me and I honestly thought I had done something to really make him mad.

He's not as cold with me now but he still seems very distant from me. He won't make conversations with me and won't try to keep a conversation I start going.

I've had suspisions all along that I was maybe his toy but I wasn't completely sure. I realise scorpios can be rather possesive, obsessive and sensitive so I don't know if I'm seeing things that aren't there or making things that ARE there worse than they're intended. Is anyone here able to shed a bit of light on this?

look at the post...'what Does He Want'. Sounds exactly the same.

He wants your attention. He's trying to get you to notice him. He likes you. He's trying to draw you out.
He'll manipulate you to do so.
If you ever do show him a sign you like him back, he might run away for awhile. And he'll never treat you the same.
If you showed intest in another, he got jealous because he's not getting what he wanted.

Should you decide you like him, be prepared for a very bumpy ride.

He sounds like the same immature manipulative jealous aqua I know...one who has hurt me over and over.

wsigaf - Don't worry I know what you mean 😛 I had never thought of that before but I guess it could be a possibility. I don't really know aquarius traits so those things you quoted would have never made me think of that as an option on my own. I would have also thought that if he could tell me he likes my appearance that he would be able to tell if he likes more than just that. Mind you, I can tell people they're attractive but it's a whole other thing to tell them I like them more than a friend.

pushit - He is annoying but that's one of his characteristics that I like. I tend to gravitate towards annoying/smart ass people for some reason.

Jules69 - I just read through it. I think these men are quite different. He's never done anything to hurt me, especially not on purpose. His reactions confused me, yes, but they didn't hurt. I mean...from reading about your situation I can definitely keep an eye out now incase he does things like that to me but at the moment the only thing I'm worried about is if he sees me as a joke or as a friend. Maybe he likes me as more but I'm really not sure about that. I think it's safer to assume he's a friend at most.

The one I speak of was just cool and friendly for a 1.5 before he started all his attention getting stuff.
I've known him 2 years now and the friendship has started going down hill from the time I asked him to stop.
Once he had my attention, he no longer wants it. IMO, he got what he wanted. And now he's off to a new conquest.

Guard your heart cause they will manipulate and tear it out before you know what hits you is all I'm saying.

Posted by jules69
The one I speak of was just cool and friendly for a 1.5 before he started all his attention getting stuff.
I've known him 2 years now and the friendship has started going down hill from the time I asked him to stop.
Once he had my attention, he no longer wants it. IMO, he got what he wanted. And now he's off to a new conquest.

Guard your heart cause they will manipulate and tear it out before you know what hits you is all I'm saying.

I'm really sorry that this has happened to you. It's never nice when friendships turn out this way. Thank you, I will guard my heart, I'm just hoping I won't need to.

In fact I guess I already am guarding my heart because of my suspicions. It's not the same kind of guard as you've been talking of, though, so I will keep that in mind too and watch out for any red flags.

"He's a very sarcastic person and I've noticed he can come across as mean to other people. He also seems to make fun of people by pretending he likes what they are saying when he actually thinks it's stupid (part of his sarcasm). He's quite often been labled a 'jerk' by others. For some reason I never got this treatment that others seem to get. While observing from the outside I could see how others came up with these judgements but knew there was more to him than that."

This is exactly what I experienced.
He didn't originally do it to me either.
I ignored it all until the day he crossed the line when he said "You have a face i could slap." and put his hand in my face. And laughed. He did to get my attention and it worked. But not the way he thought it would.
he made the one fatal mistake a man could make with me. The trust is broken.
But in retrospect I suspected he could be capable of violence regardless of what he says, based on some other things I've seen and heard him do/say.

There is no way you will see his true self until you are more deeply involved because he will not reveal it until then.

Posted by jules69
This is exactly what I experienced.
He didn't originally do it to me either.
I ignored it all until the day he crossed the line when he said "You have a face i could slap." and put his hand in my face. And laughed. He did to get my attention and it worked. But not the way he thought it would.
he made the one fatal mistake a man could make with me. The trust is broken.
But in retrospect I suspected he could be capable of violence regardless of what he says, based on some other things I've seen and heard him do/say.

There is no way you will see his true self until you are more deeply involved because he will not reveal it until then.

Hmm what he said to you was degrading. Was he degrading to everyone..is that what you mean about ignoring it all? Because this guy is not degrading. sarcasm is not really the same thing. It's a type of humour that works on 'opposites' like saying "Isn't it a nice day today?" when it's clearly raining and windy. Sarcasm can quite often rub people the wrong way which is why one would get these lables this guy I'm talking about has. And what I meant was I never got this sarcasm. This person is in no way violent in the things he does/says to other people and nothing he says or does makes me wonder these things.

If I truly felt others were justified in their thoughts of him being mean or a jerk I would not just ignore it; I do not and cannot associate with people who cause others pain for no real reason.

Posted by wsigaf
wait a minute..

an abusive person will wait for you to be hooked,
to start showing his true (bad-intentioned) self..

(before that, it's all smiles and faked careness)

maybe aquarius is mad because you aren't hooked yet..

I know you're just throwing possibilities in to the mix, and I appreciate both of you for doing so, but I feel like you two are kind of starting to take this out of proportion. This is not a major issue; all I'm trying to do is understand.

So far he actually hasn't done anything to hurt me. There has been no 'bad-intentioned self' being shown.. He's distanced himself and that's all, I hardly think that's a reason to label someone as abusive 😛

If he got ANGRY at me for showing his friend more attention than usual then yes I would have to agree with the both of you.

And anyway...I don't know much about aquarius but isn't needing your own space and freedom a big thing with this sign?

"It's a type of humour that works on 'opposites' like saying "Isn't it a nice day today?" when it's clearly raining and windy."

yeah they do that.

'needing your own space and freedom a big thing with this sign?'

Big time so if your a needy, clingy person, don't bother.

'Was he degrading to everyone..is that what you mean about ignoring it all? '

His degrading women comments. I pretended I didn't hear him.
He was 'gruff' when he talked to his g/f.
When his g/f wasn't around, he'd do anything he could to get my attention. Towards the end of their break-up, he'd do it in front of her.
He'd do all this in front of my b/f..we're all friends. B/f knew he had a crush on me but it didn't bother him, at least not after he made that fatal mistake.
He has a quick sharp temper.
he was abused by his father as a child.

So I turned the tables on him to get him to stop and it worked. I told him I wanted him. *LOL* It all stopped..just like that. For 2 months, piece. It was a game to 'win me'.

At the moment, its been 12 days since he's called us. he's on his new 'love conquest' I assume. he never told us he has a new g/f(in only 4 weeks after g/f of 3 years broke up with him.)We found out thru someone else who spilled the beans while we were at his house. The other friend said.."So did your g/f call you last night?" he said no and that was all he has ever said about her to us. LOL

If we were friends, why didn't he tell us? We've known him for 2 years.

"so I don't know if I'm seeing things that aren't there or making things that ARE there worse than they're intended. Is anyone here able to shed a bit of light on this?"

You are getting responses but you're already making the mistake of twisting things in your favor. "Ah, he's not sooo bad!", kind of thing.

At this point you have crumbs from him. Only a possible slight indication he might like you. Be the idiot who needs to be hit on the head with the frying pan of love (my analogy-don't freaking steal it! 😛 ) That means he says, "I like you a lot, please go out with meeeeeee?" Hopefully he will be on his knees while he asks yet let it not go too deep into your heart. Wait weeks, months, whilst all the time he proves to you through his actions how special you are to him. Then, maybe you might believe he does really, really like you.

Don't feed on nuances. Only pay attention to blatant, aggressive displays of love & loyalty.

Posted by Mistery
"so I don't know if I'm seeing things that aren't there or making things that ARE there worse than they're intended. Is anyone here able to shed a bit of light on this?"

You are getting responses but you're already making the mistake of twisting things in your favor. "Ah, he's not sooo bad!", kind of thing.

At this point you have crumbs from him. Only a possible slight indication he might like you. Be the idiot who needs to be hit on the head with the frying pan of love (my analogy-don't freaking steal it! 😛 ) That means he says, "I like you a lot, please go out with meeeeeee?" Hopefully he will be on his knees while he asks yet let it not go too deep into your heart. Wait weeks, months, whilst all the time he proves to you through his actions how special you are to him. Then, maybe you might believe he does really, really like you.

Don't feed on nuances. Only pay attention to blatant, aggressive displays of love & loyalty.

hahaha It's a pretty awesome analogy! Don't worry, if I stole it people would be looking at me sideways...I wouldn't be able to come up with something like that on my own 😛

What I mean by saying he's not as bad as he seems is that people were quick to say he was a bad person. Yeah he's a smart ass and could be a little nicer, but he's not an a-hole haha.

I actually don't want him to like me. I paid more attention to his friend because it's his friend I like 😛 I purely like him as a mate but I've just been wondering if he sees me in the same way or LESS. I actually never thought he might like me MORE until I came here...and even now I'm not totally convinced.

But I love the way you explained it. I think that may be something I'll live the rest of my life on 😄

ITA w/ Mistery

Still haven't figured this one out yet 😢