Aries woman confused about Aries man

Profile picture of Glitterz87
Glitterz87
@Glitterz87
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 3 · Topics: 2
I'm an Aries woman of 28. I met this aries man he was 32 at the time. He was with his mom who is a good friend of mine at church . I overlooked him because I thought he was 19 and rather young. A few weeks later my friend his mom asked me if I wanted his number I told her I was in a relationship. About a month or so later I asked his mom if he wanted my number still and to have him text me because I wanted to feel him out after i had left my boyfriend I didn't want it to be all about one thing.The next day we talked on the phone for a few hours because I liked the direction the conversation was going. That night his mom picked me up I spent 2 weeks at their place he made me breakfast in bed and took me out to dinner every night and in between we were in bed together or he was at work and I went to school. He got me a job babysitting his neice and nephews and with his mom. After the two weeks were up he backed away no calls nothing so I decided to move on. I started dating another guy a sagitarius for 2.5 years then my mom passed away a few days later he and I were soposted to get Married he left me at the alter when I called I could hear him and another girl. 3 weeks later my dad passed I called my friend who brought me back to her house her aries son arrived to see me crying and held me, held my hands, kissed my cheeks, wipped my tears away it was sweet. For the last 5 months he and I have been hooking up every so often he said he didn't want a relationship I said ok knowing I wasn't ready to be in one right away either. The last few times it seems as though he's making love to me slow and intimate. The first time it scared me and I freaked out he kissed my forehead and I immediately relaxed. The last time it was aggressive yet very intimate and sensual. He let me do things he never before let me do and held me afterwards which was new. He asked me afterwards if I was seeing or talking to anyone else I told him no I'm not I'm just trying to get my life together. I can be physical with him but opening myself to him has proven to be the hardest thing for me to do and I don't understand why that is. Yet conversation on the other hand as far as what whatever he brings up goes rather well. He has pissed me off a few times and said some mean things but it was straight forward and I respected that and bit my to tounge because I knew he was right I just let it roll off my back. I let him take control of whatever we have going on and the direction of conversation. Mostly what I wanted to know is if he is catching feelings for me because this is going on much longer then the first time or is he just seeing me as his possession or is this nothing more then physical?
Profile picture of AriesJo
AriesJo
@AriesJo
10 Years500+ Posts

Comments: 0 · Posts: 798 · Topics: 55
I'm confused, are you an Aries women or not? Usually Aries women are direct and would just ask the guy? Why not? Anyway my gut feeling is no, he hasn't feelings like that for you and he wants sex, and he's assuming you do too. I think if it was another level then you would be hanging out, and it also sounds like you aren't amazingly comfortable with expressing yourself with each other anyway, so maybe it's better if you do either just see it as sex, or move on. I think you really need to ask yourself how you feel, and what you want. Take what you want and make it the way you want it to be. Don't mess about wondering how he feels about you, ask yourself how you feel about him? Be honest with yourself and listen to your heart. From what you've said, it doesn't sound right, you are in a vulnerable place, and you need to find yourself, put your self first always, don't (and to quote you) "let him take control of whatever we have going on and the direction of conversation" ... decide what you want and take control more. Also from what you said, it sounds like intimacy is an issue, I don't know on what kind of level, but it sounds like it depends whether you are really into it or not, guys act differently if they think the women likes it, or imagine it in reverse, would you enjoy sex if the guy wasn't really in to it? of course you wouldn't, if you are uncomfortable sometimes then he will be different. And relationship in general shouldn't be that hard, don't ask yourself "why" it's so hard for you to open up to him, just accept it, these things happen for a reason, your intuition or you heart or whatever is holding back, and holding back for a reason and maybe trying to tell you something.

Profile picture of Glitterz87
Glitterz87
@Glitterz87
9 Years

Comments: 0 · Posts: 3 · Topics: 2
Thank you ariesjo. Yes im an Aries woman.. After being with this aries man a few times I realized I had serious intimacy issues. He wanted to cuddle and I wanted to do my own thing and didn't want to be bothered. No one has ever wanted to cudlle or be close to me before so I didn't know how to take it freaked me out. he then put his hand on my leg I didn't know what to do so I put mine on top of his.. I've been in and out of many abusive relationships, guys treating me as a their poession/object, i was raped by an acquaintance and molested as a child by a female babysitter. I have a hard time trusting men and women in general the aries man is no exception I don't start off trusting people they have to earn my trust. All I'm able to do with men is have sex and move on until next time it's a vicious circle that is unsatisfying except for in that moment. As of now this aries man he's the only one I feel comfortable being with that's why I keep going back to him. I see a lot myself in him and it's allowing me to find out who I am deep inside embedded somewhere I had never once looked. It may not be in the stars for us to be together but I have learned some about myself just being in his presence. I know he Cares as I care for him but I don't think its anything more then on a friendship level. I figured out why I don't open up to him as I would like to its becasuse I don't think he would care he's never told me he didn't care I just feel that way. why would he want to know and why should I open up if there is a possibility I could get hurt in the end. Being emotionless is easier all around that way I could just leave and move on without thought.