Meow. I should get used to internet tough guys. To answer maybe and to see if anybody else had something crazy happen to them.
As a Cancer I screwed up big time!
Yikes, good luck! At least you have the balls to honest, after the fact.
So.. FWB is gross.. but cheating isn't? Gotcha.
I've never cheated on anyone before because I think that's a crappy thing to do and yes it's gross. Wow high horses in here. Can we just delete this thread. Obviously nobody here has done anything wrong and are great perfect beings.
Posted by nyx
I've never cheated on anyone before because I think that's a crappy thing to do and yes it's gross. Wow high horses in here. Can we just delete this thread. Obviously nobody here has done anything wrong and are great perfect beings.
I am kind of amazed that a cancer girl cheated. It's so uncharacteristic that I don't really know what to say.
Posted by incandescentcancerPosted by nyx
I've never cheated on anyone before because I think that's a crappy thing to do and yes it's gross. Wow high horses in here. Can we just delete this thread. Obviously nobody here has done anything wrong and are great perfect beings.
I am kind of amazed that a cancer girl cheated. It's so uncharacteristic that I don't really know what to say.click to expand
One of my best friends, a Cancer girl cheats all the time. She has plan a b c s..and these are guys who think theyre in a relationship with her. Indecisiveness is also a Cancer trait right?
Posted by nyx
Meow. I should get used to internet tough guys. To answer maybe and to see if anybody else had something crazy happen to them.
BTW.. something crazy didn't happen TO you... you got drunk and cheated on your boyfriend of a year and a half... with his friend... not only that, but HE'S (the friend, not your bf) been having this "gross FWB thing" with a girl who you say is YOUR friend.
To me, the funniest part was your drunk ass telling your bf's buddy how you aren't that kinda girl, you don't sleep around or do one night stands... so he tells you he's always had a crush on you.. and BINGO.. you hop into bed with him!
Then you sit here spilling your garbage, agonizing over whether or not you should tell your boyfriend and your friend.. that you ARE the kind of girl who's clearly just a few tequila shots away from falling onto a penis, regardless of relationship statuses all around, and who can't be trusted.
This crazy thing didn't happen TO you. You DID this thing, and them come here acting like you have no fault, blame, or even responsibility for your own actions.. and then expected warm hands to pat your head and comfort you and tell you.. what, exactly? That it's okay to cheat? Give opinions on whether or not to tell the 'injured parties', which you won't listen to cuz you've already decided what to do and are only seeking support and validation for your choices.
What exactly did you think you'd find here?
i like when Nefer comes for a visit 🙂
Posted by xxnightbynight
It's too bad females get into relationships and then cheat. Why get into a relationship? Enjoy being single. If you can't help yourselves... just be single and not worry about feelings getting in the way.
My dear lady, you deserve a medal. I have been saying this forever and have even mentioned it here many times. Enjoy being single and don't bring pain to your and other people's lives. The trouble is more than half the water signs have this unhealthy obsession to be with someone plus they pretend to be so into feelings when in reality they only care about THEIR feelings, result they fuck over everyone else. I wish there were more people who were confident enough to be like you, we would all be so very happy!
Posted by minata
One of my best friends, a Cancer girl cheats all the time. She has plan a b c s..and these are guys who think theyre in a relationship with her. Indecisiveness is also a Cancer trait right?
To be very frank, I am saddened to hear that. I have known several cancer women and my last long term relationship was with a Cancer woman, I only know them as loving gentle souls. I haven't come across cancer women like this one here who got drunk and fucked over atleast two people. Indecision? Are you kidding me, wild horses couldn't stop a Cancer from doing what "feels" right. What kind of Cancers have you been meeting??
Posted by xxnightbynight
It's only because I've experienced it first hand... several times. - I just came to terms (and this will be an on-going thing for the rest of my life) that I'm selfish and I want my feelings met as well... so I attract people like myself into my life and then when I fall for them I don't understand why it is that they aren't ready to be in a relationship or WANT to be in one with me... it's because I am the same way... but... it was all felt on an unconscious level... now I realize it... but I attract YOUNG guys into my life... and I dont think they're ready to face their demons and see what I see... I dunno. I can't explain it. - There's a lot of emotions and feelings that go into what I'm trying to say... but i can't put it into words. *le sigh*
I understand what you're saying very well. You got to be selfish and take care of your needs first, you can't be useful to someone else when you aren't useful to yourself. However you got to avoid the risk of co-dependent relationships, that could very well be the reason you attract these young men. They somehow see you as an older version of themselves and are trying to learn from you however you don't get anything in return there. If you link that to the selfishness we talked about earlier, you're still not selfish enough! You're giving up too much without getting enough in return, it's a bad deal. You can't save others, you have to see people as who they are rather than who they can be (have mentioned this in earlier posts to others).
I am trying to do this for the past few years and perhaps it will be helpful to you too, make sure that you know what you don't want. People always say you should know what you want but that is very difficult and requires a lot of experience, so it's easier to start with eliminating what you don't want! I think human beings are inherently good at knowing things they don't like or find unpleasant and I consider that my starting point for figuring out what I do need. This way perhaps you will meet men of the right age who have something to contribute to you rather than just take from you. I understand the conflicted nature of the overwhelming feelings that you have. Feel free to talk to me about it if you wish.
Posted by xxnightbynight
- I do feel conflicted because I feel like maybe if I try and "save" these guys from themselves they can in turn try and help save me. - It's weird... it's not healthy. I need some serious soul searching.
The very basis of codependency. It will never work, just because you try to save them doesn't mean they will appreciate or reciprocate. A good relationship can only be between almost equals. If either party has a significant upper hand, everyone gets screwed. Think about that as you soul search 🙂
Posted by xxnightbynight
" you have to see people as who they are rather than who they can be"
^^^ so true.
For some reason you being brave enough to admit this sort of turns me on.....
- I do feel conflicted because I feel like maybe if I try and "save" these guys from themselves they can in turn try and help save me. - It's weird... it's not healthy. I need some serious soul searching.
I meant to say THIS turns me on.....🙂
I meant to say THIS turns me on.....🙂
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