cancer man and insecurities

I've had my fair share of run ins with cancers, but Cowboy (yes, I gave him a pet name) sure stands above the rest in this area. He consistently fishes for affirmations thru random comments, whether he's looking for a personal comment or learning about me, likely both, but too much can be overkill. Sometimes these comments can be so left field that I wonder if he's actually looking for an answer or if he's really that insecure.

We met online, so I didn't think much of it when he asked if I've been on many other dates from the site that we were matched on. It was the first question he asked in the first phone call he made after our first date, as well as our second date. He doesn't say A date or ANY date, he asks if I've been on LOTs of dates or MANY dates with the notion that I am dating a slew of men. This question question sticks out like a sore thumb, making it hard for me to not wonder what it is he's really questioning. Is this a question of Credibility? Confidence? How available I am making myself? It's what I have narrowed the possibilities down to, or is it something else?

I am a very direct communicator when things need to be said. In the beginning however, I seem to have to understand a person's motive before I feel safe enough to open up, even then, it is in doses. He's even mentioned that I am not sharing as much about myself as he is. I've also noticed that he's not completely comfortable with being asked direct questions. As soon as I caught onto that, I've been hesitant to say much. Is there a placement for communication? His mercury is in cancer, moon in aquarius.

How do I answer any of his questions without being too direct? How else can I show him that I like him? Or do I tell him? haha my feathers are ruffled by this boy and I don't want to accidently say or imply anything that might put a wedge in between us. I have to mention that I laid it out on the table for him on or by our first date that I don't cook or clean. I don't plan on having any more kids, and intend on living in The City in my foreseeable future. He's dear Cowboy, who plans on raising his kids in the country when they come along. I am very tickled that he continues to talk to me and vaguely mentions that we will possibly have future encounters. haha. We are different people.

I enjoy the dxp forums, especially this cancer forum. Thanks!

oh, I'm also having trouble with him initiating any dates. He was pretty persistent with the first one, and we've had two more. He doesn't keep me antsy too long calling every 2-3, maybe 4 days, and I've initiated 2-3 calls in the 4-5 weeks we've been talking. I think there's a good push-pull there. We haven't hung out on weekends, he drives about an hour away to see his sister and her kids and goes hunting. He calls either friday before he leaves, or on monday when he's back.

( back to previous post) Or is he telling me I should be seeing other people?

Confusion!!

Lady Aries, I would suggest you forget your Cowboy and move on. As you've said yourself, and the impression I get from reading your post, is you two aren't that compatible together. Aries and Cancer aren't really the best match. You need to have patience with Cancers, and it sounds like you will have trouble giving Cowboy that patience. Also, you want different things in life. Why even pursue a future with him? The push-pull will turn from playful to hateful.

There's always exceptions to the rule, but generally Fire and Water don't mix, unless your other placements are very favourable.

HIS .... I don't know his ascendant.

Sun Cancer
Moon Aquarius
Mercury Cancer
Venus Gemini
Mars Libra
Jupiter Scorpio
Saturn Libra
Uranus Sagittarius
Neptune Sagittarius
Pluto Libra
True Node Cancer


MINE

Sun Aries
Moon Scorpio
Mercury Aries
Venus Taurus
Mars Aries
Jupiter Sagittarius
Saturn Scorpio
Uranus Sagittarius
Neptune Sagittarius
Pluto Libra
True Node Gemini

Ascendant Scorpio


I'm entertaining the idea of what could be, but moreso, I am trying to learn his communication style . All my friends and close acquaintances male or female are either cancer or has cancer as a major placement, and we are all in it for the long haul. I can't be too wrong. I enjoy the idea that this cancer has interest in me to any degree. It's hard to catch any, but what's funny is they seek me out. 😉

I am sorry, but what makes you think an Aries-Cancer relationship will work?

Oh come on guys, stop with the negative. I know so many aries/cancer marriages (there's actually 3 in my family) that are working out quite smoothly.

Trying to understand the most misunderstood creatures of the zodiac and merely enjoying the company of oh-so-sweet cancers while I am at it. 🙂 Like I said, they are the persistent ones, not I, I'm just in for the ride.