Cancer man and polygamy

So i have been seeing this cancer man for about 4 months now and we have devleloped and strong love for one another. We are not commited because of the different beliefs we share. To try and make a long story short, When i met him i wasn't exactly physically attracted to him but throughout the months i learned to love him. He's everything i want but... he believes that a man should have more than one woman. Within those months, i met a pisces, i had a 1 week stand with this pisces. I told the cancer a couple of days after it happened because althou we weren't fully commited i felt really guity that i did it. We decided to make it work anyhow but now he is giving me two sides of him. We talk alot about his views on polygamy and he feels that if a woman does it she is considered selfish because men out weigh women in numbers. I totally believe that is true to a concern extinct but this is 2009 and we now have the gay communties and more children and babies than adults so the numbers r altered, in my opinion. I told him he needs to stop living in the past and i believe that any woman he finds i don't think they would go 4 that. I have decided to let us go because i don't believe in wat he believes, the problem is now we love each other to death but neither of us want to change beliefs. I'm really hurt at the fact that i fell in love with him and now we can't be together. *Note that i didn't know his beliefs until later in the relationship. I just want some opinions on this matter..someone help😢

Damn, i would say just leave, you cannot change a person.You find someone with you beliefs, whats more important....you happy down the road or him?? Make you, your first priority always.

If he believes in polygamy,.. Ok, you believe in polygamy too. It is a fair deal.

Krobe y do say that i believe in polygamy? Yea Moon I have told him that he is cosidered the selfish and greedy one bcuz a women is not allowed to do the same; he feels we r not built that way. It's crazy! but anyway, i told him he has a rigt to his own opinion but his opinion doesn't count if there isn't knowledge about it. just like the senatar who shouted out "you lie" 2 Obama but he hasn't explained what he lied about. Anyway, Yes moon I live northeast here in the states, NYC. Dream, ur so right at da beginning of da day, i need to be happy as well as him so i have decided to cut it as casual friendship, but i don't think he is feelin dat. It is wat it is

Do you want a man or do you want to fight? Meaning, I don't even see the point in telling a man whom your not committed to that you slept with someone else, plus men see through this kind of behavior, the woman feels insecure because the man isn't revealing his feelings so she tries to force him out by challenging him in some way and he has no choice but to friend zone her, send mixed messages because she's too insecure to just be herself and not play these mind fucking head games. He was afraid to lose you so your tactic worked but then he had time to see through your actions and decided he would make things difficult to the point that you would be forced to let him go.

IMO it seems your doing everything you can to turn him off which is more your problem not his, his views and beliefs have nothing to do with why you can't be with him, why you can't date him, when people make excuses why they can't date one another it's usually because one person is not into the other person or one or both people have commitment phobia/commitment issues and will use every excuse to stay out of each others lives.

Men are not stupid, they know when they are being manipulated, maybe not right away but once the realization surfaces they are done, he been through with you yet breaking up is tricky, most men are smart enough to know that it's better to make the woman believe it's her tha is breaking up with him, it's less confrontational and it's easier and they know how to get rid of women they don't want to be with, some do the let's be friends and a huge sum of men passive aggressively push women out of the relationship into the friend zone lane...seems that is what this guy passive agressively forced you to do

God, this is so primitive.
He wants to spread his seed amongst as many women as possible in order to reproduce but he doesn't want the women to sleep with other men because then he can't guarnatee that if they got pregnant it'd be his child.
Even if he's using protection and everything, this is the subconcious message controlling his reasoning - no matter how logical he tries to sound.

Tiki, ur wrong and right at the same time, if that makes since. It was me that kept it in the friend zone and he was the one that wanted the relationship saying, "I feel u r the one 4 me" I told him, "u don't even know me". Well, i kept it there for a while, 2 months r so bcuz i didn't want a relationship until recently. Now it is me that wants a committed relationship but he wants other women as well. He strongly belives in this and still to this day is tryin to let me c his logic. We remain friends but we just cannot be together bcuz of this. He calls me everyday he tells me he loves me every other day but i tell him "don't tell me u love me when u really don't bcuz if u did i would be enough 4 u." He feels like i should confirm to his beliefs I don't c another wrong with his opinion but just don't try to comform others. I told him about pisces bcuz i did feel a extremly guilty for the fact that were shifting into a relationship, maybe to was not a good idea, but it is what it is. Anyway i feel it's best this way anyhow we just don't c eye to eye and i can't let love blind me.

Ok I see, he was in chase her mode for awhile with you, for whatever reason you rejected him by friend zoning him which by the way will make a man chase a woman to prove his masculinity and then for whatever reason you slept with another man and rubbed it in his face by admitting it (I'm sure that dug into his self esteem to know the girl he chase and desire disliked him so much she admits to sleeping with another man OUCH) and now your in deep love (not sure why but your in love but you are) and now that you want a real relationship he's decided he still wants you but he wants to eat some side cake when he feels like it (which means he doesn't TRUST you). I see the conflict you have created day one, you didn't want him when you could have him but now that you can't have him all too yourself your deeply in love and torn...okay makes sense I guess

He demoted you from exclusive relationship to exclusivity with conditions on the side....who needs that certainly you don't

I would have to agree with the people here. Walk away. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and you will be able to find someone who you are attracted to, love, and has similar beliefs as you.

Oh, and 'women out number men' is a really poor argument. Good for you for cutting things off. Stick to your guns.