Cancer update

My cancer friend and I just parted ways just now. We actually stayed out all night (we haven't stayed out this late in a long time). Does this mean she's starting to like me in a romantic way? We went to about 3 places and then when we were driving home we were passing a field and she jumped out and took her shoes off and her dress off and started running in the cold ass rain. WHOA. I just followed through and did the same thing. I really feel like we were having a moment. Were we having a moment or am I delusional? She said it was a teachable moment and she wanted to teach me how to be more than human and allow my spirit to drive my body instead if always having my body drive my spirit. Why do you think she did this? She's usually this way with everyone even strangers but something just feels so right about all of this. I want her so bad. I want her to officially call me her man and be able to protect her and care for her and soothe her in ways I can't do as just a friend. But I feel like I can't pass her barrier. She's very open but yet very mysterious and private and I want to break that barrier. I asked what she's gettin into tomorrow and Sunday and she said she'll be "unavailable". Why these choice of words?

Also I noticed she could never spend more than one day with me back to back. Do cancers disappear because they like their space or could there be someone getting her attention?

And what things turn on a cancer woman sexually and romantically?

Are cancer women usually wild and crazy chicks that play the field? In all my years of listening to her dating stories, she'll tell me details but not enough details to know if she's really a player or just a freedom loving hippie that spreads her love to everyone. Because most people would say she's a player and I think she has more game than the worst players out here but she never agrees with me with this. She says genuinely does nice things for people because she cares for people and humanity so being good to people means being good to humanity and becoming a better human. And she actually loves doing things for people. Major things that most people will never do for someone else and minor things. This trait about her confused me and causes me to question where she's at with me. But looking at myself I'm exactly her type. I'm Japanese, I make good money, I have a good job and I'm into a lot of the things she's into.

I can't take this limbo anymore and I need to pop the question but I'm so nervous about the outcome and I have no clue how she might take it. When it comes down to moment when I try to tell her just how much I'm in love with her and be brutally honest about the intensity of me feelings I get tongue tied and the words won't come out. I get all sweaty like I'm in middle school or something. And when I get tongue tied and she's looking at me with those bright eyes waiting for my words to come out I just lose it and keep it in. Plus she tough as nails. She's very feminine and loving and warm but she's also very masculine and stoic. And she very intelligent and usually rips me a new one in our arguments and I'm sort of intimidated. But I'm tired of fucking around with these other lame ass broads, trying to find someone like her. It only makes it worse for me. I'm tired of going out with her and watching dudes throw themselves at her. I'm tired of watching her beautiful ways and not being able to share them in a closer more intimate way with her

Arielle you make a lot of sense. But times she says she's not available after we have a good night I ask her at the end if the weekend what she did and usually it's something that is major an takes a lot of energy and staying up late. ? Maybe she can't take too much of me at one time. But can you tell me more about your freedom loving ways and why you're like that? And you can stay committed to one man? And is her freedom loving ways the reason why she doesn't bug me or initiate often?

Whatever you do, don't make any direct moves on her. Just slightly imply that you wish you had a gf like her.

I used to have a friend that I trusted a lot. And we would go crazy together kind of like this. But I sensed that he thought I was 'easy' or that I did what I did just to flirt with him.. which killed the magic. Who knows something could have happened between us if he had just let things be..

So I say, go with the flow !