DOes this cancer want me or NOt? Jeez!

Thanks to any who can respond!

I absolutely fell in love with a cancer guy a year ago.(used loosely b/c I was falling for him..not completely on the ground!) But we spent sooo much time together...talking on the phone, spending the night with eachother,(well more time spent on the phone!), but once I asked him if he wanted to be in a relationship w/me, he told me he just wanted to keep things simple! and here I am thinking we already are acting as if we are in a relationship! ONE CATCH: there was no sex involved due to my beliefs of waiting until marriage and he loved that! "he could wait to sleep with me"-per his words!
But after he told me about keeping things simple, I backed waaay off mostly b/c I was hurt. I didnt hear from him for a while, but I thought of him a lot. He called me on a holiday, I listened to the message and waited 2 weeks to call him back..(that took a lot out of me, but I really wanted to play the "not be available", thats what cancers like right?!)
3 months past,nothing! he didnt remember my b-day! very sad! but a little after that, I was on a beach vacation I decided to take a chance and start a convo with him via text mess. I told him there was a guy hitting on me at the pool and that the guy reminded me of him..which made me think of him and want to text him..Haha! to my shock, which completely threw me off, his response was "are u ok? hes not trying to touch you is he?" Im like, what the hell?! where did that come from? we havent talked in 3 months..and he was acting like a jealous bf?

ALl this time Im thinking if he really wants me, why doesn't he just call me and just spill it out?? write a letter! something!

Last thing...after that we didnt talk for another month and a half..."I" sent him another message and told him I always thought about him when I was out with other guys and I missed him making me laugh all the time...and I told him to tell me to stop thinking about him..haha,good test right?! he responded with "no, I dont mind you thinking about me"...

Then a couple of days ago I sent him a message first(as always!) and asked how he was doing, and another shocker, he said his job took him to another state and he would be there for awhile, and then he asked me "if I had been to this very expensive french restaurant lately?" Im like what the hell again?!! that really came out of nowhere..it was restaurant I picked out, a very romantic quiet place where we both tried french cuisine for the first time, we had a great time! but that was when we were both so happy with eachother! Im like why would I go there, it was only with you! I didnt say that, but thats what I wanted to say.
Okay sorry so long! so does anyone know what could be going on this guys head!!? Maybe he just wanted space and now since hes had it he doesnt know what steps to take to ask me out again? are these subtle cues that are going on, typical of an uncertain cancer??

ooohhh, you have alot of spice in your life. I'm totally jeolous!

hehehe isn't it exciting - could be boring u know, he could jus pay too much attention and be all over u and callin u all the time - lol come on this adds some fun to it!

on a more serious note:
i think u should be totally upfront wit him - i'm a cancer girl n i like ppl sayin what's on their minds to me - maybe he doesn't want to rush into anything too fast (i am like that sometimes n will step away from a situation jus to get control of my feelins - but that's me) - he seems to like you.

i think cancers like to be true to themselves and others (i do) --i don't like leading ppl on unless i'm playing games but even then if someone asked me seriously how i felt bout them i would give them an honest answer - so my advice is jus to come out and ask him exactly what's going on - that's u best bet in my opinion - just cut to the chase

The easiest and fastest way to resolve this is for you guys to have sex. How can a cancer and pisces spend this night together and not have sex? Surely the thought was there??

Thanks so much guys! SRG.......YESSSS, the thought was there ALWAYS!! but I have to say mostly on his part(girls are more in control, right?!!)! there was one time we had went out and I wanted to stay the night with him..and he told me no b/c he really had to get up the next morning..and then me being the sweet girl I am, batted my eyes at him and made a sad face...he gave in and while we were walking to his car he says "but you HAVE to sleep on the right side of the bed!" (I had awaken one morning on his side and I think it was too much for him 😉!!
I actually made a joke to him about a month ago...I asked him if he just wanted to hook up and have casual sex(since we werent together, we never got a chance to when we were talking, right!)and it would be b/t us! (but I really just wanted to see if he would say..yes lets do it!)..but no he didnt even respond to that...and I dont know if I was more sad b/c of not getting a response or if he would have said yes I just want to have sex w/u! But in a way I was glad I didnt get one..2 days later, I said I was only kidding, and I hope he knew that!

BUt I get being upfront and honest with my feelings..but Im so scared of being rejected again...b/c I took so much pride in "ignoring" him for months, I was and am really proud of myself that I didnt fall into the desperate female trap! and he got to see he was not a top priority for me and I had a life!(And that he is not all that! haha!)
Now I feel like if I ask him anything about his feelings toward me, what if Im wrong about his "subtle clues" and he thinks "wow this girl is still thinking about me like that, she is so sprung and a loser, she hasnt moved on, now I will really ignore her!"
Crazy, huh! The part that I keep rationalizing is that he ONLY made those comments after I said something to him first, like "how are you". He never(on his own) would just text or call me first, its like I have to be the first one to do it...IS this how Cancer men are, if HE's the one afraid of rejection..that would make sense...

Wow.. you guys must have had some incredible self control if you spent the night in the same bed and didn't have sex.

Personally, if a girl I liked "jokingly" proposed having casual sex.. I would have done my best to make it happen. I don't know about your friend but I would take a comment like that pretty seriously.

Anyway, overthinking and overationalizing is pointless.. you guys should have had sex a long time ago - it would have made both your lives easier now.

picesgrl,

The more I read these postings about Cancers, the more I am convinced that they aren't initiators. They will sit back and just observe, probably forever. I have never known one to make the first move when it comes to feelings of the heart. Even if they are feeling something towards someone, they will rather give a show of aloofness. In my past experience with Cancer guys, they will charm you till you fall into the emotional soup and can't get out. My take on this...why— Why do they do this? I think that it is better to show him that you have an exciting life with or without him. This will pique his curiosity more. Give it a few days and/ or weeks, and you will see another side unfold. Insecurity, maybe...but I think Cancer or no Cancer, if a guy is interested, he will find his way to you no matter what.

Someone write me a list of all these cancer perpetrators.. so many people unhappy with us..

Ldybg377, I have a Capricorn moon with Leo rising. I like my chart because I have double of every sign.